Debra Kasowski

5 Smart Strategies to Build Relationships and Win Clients for Life

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Success in life and business comes from the relationships that you build. I often hear people saying that they don’t have enough time to connect further too busy. Building relationships take some forethought and some planning. Before you know it time will have passed and you being be wondering where your clients and friends are.
As you develop relationships you will learn that life and business are not separate entities. Business relationships are like friendships. They need your time and attention to learn about other people and what interests them. People need to learn and trust the people they do business with you.
There are several smart strategies that you could be doing to build relationships and win clients for life. Build relationships with people in a way that they become your champion.
Be a Giver. Take time to introduce 2 people to someone in your network who you feel need to connect. You will start helping people build their own networks and opportunities. Take time to network in new places and get to know new people. You build a richer supply of connections to share and give. You’ll become known as a connector and they will want to connect you with others as well.
Create valuable content. Let your voice come through articles, blog posts, and social media posts. Create content that is worth is worth sharing and people find value. Value can come in the form of education, inspiration, and entertainment. Answer questions and offer solutions to people’s pain points.
Keep in touch regularly with your clients and prospects. Let people know that you’re thinking of them with a handwritten birthday card, an article of interest, or a trend that you noticed in their industry. Invite them to social functions, workshops, business mixers, and lunches. Get to know people for who they are and not just what they can do for you.

“Something that solves their problems would be best, even if you don’t own the content.”
from ‘The Secret Collaborative Economy: More Clients, More Exposure, More Profit, FASTER!”
― Marsha Wright, TV Business Expert & Entrepreneur

Exceed client expectations. Do not overpromise on what you’re willing to deliver. Remember the delivery of service alone does not create the wow factor. Keep in mind it’s not a bad thing to meet their expectations. If you want people to start talking about you in a positive way, you need to be able to exceed their expectations.
Be a curious listener. One of my favorite things to do at networking events is to ask questions and watch people. Curious listeners are people who take a genuine interest in others by focusing on asking questions to learn more about who they are, what motivates them, and what they do for fun. These listeners make others around them feel like they are the most important person in the world. It is not based on flattering or as some people would say “sucking up”. It is about taking a genuine interest in another person and appreciating what they have to offer.

The single greatest “people skill” is a highly developed & authentic interest in the *other* person. – Bob Burg

Remember networking doesn’t have to be all about business. You might be surprised that where some networking takes place. It could be in the bathroom, at the gym, your child’s soccer game, the grocery line, a cocktail party, or even on the golf course. Where ever there is a gathering of people, there’s an opportunity to network and build relationships. You need to get from behind your computer and be visible in the community so people can get to know you and see you. You never know where one connection with lead.
Start connecting! Continue to build and nurture your relationships over time and watch what happens! Win the hearts of your clients for life!
Who will you connect today? What content are you going to produce and share? Who will you send a card or invite to? Who will you WOW today?
DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

EPISODE 7: Making the Human Connection

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“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.” Brene Brown

Connecting with people is human nature; we are social beings. With technology, you would think we would be more connected than ever but the opposite is true. People feel disconnected because they are missing the human connection.

Research shows that if you want to make a good first impression it is best to make it in person. Once a person makes the first impression it is often difficult to change it but we need to be careful “not to judge a book by its cover”, they could be your best client. You want to be open and test the reality of your impression by asking thoughtful questions and getting to know the person better. These impressions are often made in 3 seconds and 7 seconds online.

I remember a sales person sharing a story with me about a time when a person dressed in dirty work clothes came into their furniture store right before closing – 20-30 minutes before. Most of the sales people avoided eye contact with the person but he was curious about this person who just came into the store. This individual wanted to furnish his whole house and used this salesman to do it. Imagine his commission – all because her withheld or did not let his judgment influence him.

How do you make a human connection?

  • Start with being yourself.
  • Be Open.
  • Be Confident in Who You Are.
  • Smile – it’s FREE and a universal language!
  • Project a Positive Attitude!
  • Start with small talk and learn more.

Ask questions such as:

  • Do you have a pet?
  • Do you have children?
  • Are you married?
  • Where did you go on your last vacation?
  • What book are you currently reading?

Take an interest in who people are. Be genuinely curious!  There is a saying, “People want to know how much you care before they want to know how much you know!”

Make it about them!

Build relationships that are win-win without going straight to selling your product or service.

TMW_PDFclickhere.fw“If your focus is the immediate sale, you’re going to miss a lot of future opportunities.” – Ivan Misner, Founder of BNI, Business Network International

Learn about the people you connect with. What are their hobbies or interests? What are their personal goals?

Discover common interests – ways you can relate to one another.

Focus on what you can do for them. Introduce them to people they need to know – BE a CONNECTOR.

Connectors are influencers – whatever you put out into the world you will receive back.

Invite clients to be a part of your circle or community by inviting them to lunch or business mixers. Mail handwritten notes of gratitude or warm letters letting them know what you have been up to. Invite them to educational workshops. Email or send them an article that might be of interest to them.

I remember listening to Sandra Yancey, the Founder of eWomen Network share that when she was a little girl her mother told her to remember, “Give without remembering and take without forgetting.”

We need to find time to connect in our busy schedules. When we do connect – we need to actively listen and be present in the conversation.

Truly listen…

Hold back from jumping into the conversation before the other person stops speaking. It’s okay to wait for a pause. Think and then talk.

When I was in my coach training, we had an acronym – W.A.I.T. – Why Am I Talking?

Listen – you will learn so much more!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Time 9:28 min

How to Master the Mental Game to Achieve Peak Performance

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We take for granted the power of our thinking. I was recently talking with my son about his golf game. He was preparing for a golf tournament. I wanted to know how he mentally prepared for his golf game – what was he thinking with every shot? When I asked him, he mentioned that his mind is a clear state. “I try to think of nothing.” How was this possible?

Last year, when he played I noticed that when he was on tournament tour his score was significantly higher than when he was golfing with family and friends. Even though he did not talk about it, I could sense the performance anxiety and the analyzing of every shot. I would talk with him about the power of positive thought and self- talk. Focus on what you want not what you don’t want. Golf, life, and business are all about the mental game.

Recently, he came home from the driving range and stated, “Mom, guess what? My friend asked me the same question you did. What are you thinking before you take your shot?” He laughed and mentioned that I ask him that question regularly – nothing. His friend went on to tell him about the power of positive thinking and how golf was a mental game. I was grinning, “Son, what does your mother tell you and what does she teach others?” Yeah, I know Mom. He said it would change my game if I thought that every shot I take I thought about hitting a great shot. You know what? It works!”

“When the student is ready, the teacher appears.”

Buddist Proverb

Maybe I was not the right teacher. I even talked to him about the Power Poses that Amy Cuddy talks about in her TEDTalk. I asked him to do the “Victory Stance” with his arms up in the air. He teased me, “My mom is crazy!” with his arms up the air beaming ear to ear. Teenagers! It definitely created a positive state. Now his friends have even started doing it. Subliminal messaging may work!

How does apply to life and business? Your mindset directly influences how your act and perform. Your self-talk directly impacts your thinking and ultimately your focus.

Personal Mantras

Golf performance coach, David MacKenzie talks about having personal mantras. Keeping a positive focus is a must. Whether you are on the golf course, selling your products, or delivering a business presentation, you need to keep your head in the game.

The most powerful phrase is… “I am…”

Joel Osteen talks about “Whatever follows I am will follow.”

Make it empowering. Say things like…

I am a great presenter.

I am an effective leader.

I am mentally tough.

I am capable of overcoming any challenge.

The way you speak to yourself does matter. You may not think anything of it but it does. You can be sabotaging your own success.

Focus on the present…be mindful

Take a deep breath when you are faced with a challenge. Deep breathing is not only calming but it helps bring you back to the present moment – the opportunity at hand. Your mind can be freed of the mental chatter clouding your judgment. Whatever challenge you are facing, know that you can figure it out.  Just Breathe.

Don’t Beat Yourself Up

We can be our worst critics pointing out every fault, flaw, or failure. We are harder on ourselves than we are with others. What we say and think about ourselves is not always the realistic. Your thinking can be distorted.

Challenge your assumptions and question your thoughts. Remember you are a work in progress.

Exaggerating. Are you thinking of the situation as the end of the world? This is it – it’s over. If so, you are missing out on the learning and the possibilities that lie in front of you.

Black and White Thinking. There is no room for compromise. If it not a certain way, it is not right. Remember there is more than one way to get to your destination. What else can you do?

Emotional Reasoning. No matter what you are thinking, you can find proof to demonstrate you are right even though it may not be the what is actually going on. “I think and feel it is true. I can find evidence to prove it.”

Mindreading. You are assuming what others are thinking or saying about you without even knowing the truth. If you really want to know ask. Otherwise, remember the saying, “What other people think of you is none of your business.”

Reframe & Replace

Pay attention to your self-talk. What are you saying to yourself? We have 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts in a day and the majority of thought is said to be 80% negative so it is very important to pay attention to what you are thinking and reframe and replace it with positive thinking and words.

If you are saying…

“The presentation (meeting) was awful.”  Change it to… “I can do better on the next one.”

“I am a failure.” Change it to… “I am learning and growing.”

“I will never get it right.” Change it to… “I will take a different approach next time.”

Drop words like always, never, and can’t from your vocabulary. Shift your thinking from thinking things are impossible to possible.

Positive thinking impacts your performance. When I work with my clients, your mindset is a key piece that we focus on. Utilize these strategies to develop mental toughness and confidence so you can master your mental game and achieve peak performance. As the saying goes, “What you think about you bring about.”

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

EPISODE 6: Boost Your Productivity and Performance

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“If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done.” – Bruce Lee

Productivity and performance can be a total game changer. We all have the same 24 hours in a day but some people seem to get more accomplished than others and others say, “I don’t get it. How do you get to do all that?” The secret lies in the sauce.

DKI_Episode 6 Time_Management_StrategiesBoost productivity and performance is about blocking time. We cannot make more time. We all have the same amount of time but how do we structure the time that we have. How are we using it more effectively?

I have an awesome downloadable – Infographic for you!

DOWNLOAD HERE

There are many Time Tracking logs or apps out there. I have used time tracking for those people who claim that they are “so busy” and we hear people use the buzz word “busy”. I do make the attempt to track my time anytime I catch myself saying that I am busy. Busy is that buzz word but it is almost like an excuse for people not doing things. It is actually saying, “I do not want to do that” or “That’s not important to me.”

TMW_PDFclickhere.fwWhen you start tracking your time, you can start seeing where you are spending your time. You can do the same exercise by tracking the amount of water you drink, the workouts you want to have, or anywhere you want to make a change. If you start tracking it, anything that you track you are able to manage better. Start tracking your time for 3-7 days to see where you are actually spending your time and then you can adjust accordingly.

One of the great things I like to recommend to people is scheduling 30 minutes in the morning to start to plan your day and another 30 minutes at the end of the day to review and plan for the next day. You will be forward thinking, you are making the plan, and have an intended direction of where you want your day to go.

Make a list of all your priorities. What are the A-game changers where you are going to have the greatest return on your investment? This is where you need to be focusing your time. Focus on your priorities first.

Set office hours to eliminate distractions and interruptions. It is so easy for people to pop by and say you are working at home today or you don’t have office hours I can just pop in and have a casual chat. If you are in the middle of working on something important that you have a deadline, these interruptions can really suck some of the time that you have. Consider that when you are working on a big project there may be a time of the day where you just need to close your door.

Turn off notifications and email alerts on your smartphone and computer. BING! Every time you see one of those, it is a bright shiny object! BING! BING! BING! Or SQUIRREL – anything that takes you attention to a different place!

Block out time on your calendar to focus on high priority tasks. Block off dedicated time. Use a timer. You would be surprised how much you can accomplish in 20 minutes when you are trying to beat a clock.

Develop a system for managing information such as paper and emails so you only deal with it once if possible. Consider creating folder or filters to help sort emails. Do not hang on to emails that do not require a reply or that you can get the information somewhere else.

Delegate to others who have the knowledge, skills, and ability to get a task done so you can focus on high priority tasks requiring your expertise. I know sometimes we like to be in control and be the boss. If you want to be a smart boss you need to delegate some of that out. If people have the knowledge, skills, and ability, let them do the work that they love to do. You can focus on the work that is a high priority and you can focus on your expertise. Everybody is using their skills more effectively on a team.

Don’t schedule meetings unless they are necessary and they have a targeted agenda. Sometimes I think people throw up meetings just to have a meeting but then they get there, there is no focus or direction and they feel that people are just wasting their time. When they could be focusing on what is really important to them, what has pressing deadlines, and where they are going to get the greatest return on their investment? Ask yourself whether or not you can do a meeting over the phone versus driving to somewhere or taking up a lot of time. Sometimes it can be addressed in an email. Consider how you can respond so you can get to the meat of the matter very quickly.

FOCUS on ONE activity or task until completed…then REWARD yourself and CELEBRATE! It might be a stretch break or getting a coffee or a cup of tea giving you a small reward so you are focused on one activity. “If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done.” When you start doing too many things or multi-tasking, it divides your attention.  Put your intention and attention to the place you want to get your results.

Try these 10 things and you will be boosting your productivity and performance and watch what happens to your results.

Be an implementer!

Email me at Debra@debrakasowski.com and let us know what you would like to be featured on the show. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Give us a 5-star rating!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Time 9:11 min

3 Ways to Establish Boundaries in Business

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Sometimes the term “boundary” receives a negative connotation due to a meaning a limit and restriction. Boundaries are necessary in business in order to be more effective and productive with their time, money, and resources. Business owners often think that potential and current customers will be read held by a company or organization that has boundaries; however, this is not true.

“Time is the most valuable coin in your life. You and you alone will determine how that coin will be spent. Be careful that you do not let other people spend it for you.”
― Carl Sandburg

Here are three ways that you can get started by establishing boundaries in your business:

Set office hours. An open door policy is great but it can also take up a lot of time when conversations are more social rather than about business. Connecting with people is important however consider having a time limit on the social aspect and focus on the business at hand. For anyone working from home, boundaries are important because many people who see you working at home think that you are either not working or have the flexibility to change her schedule at a moment’s notice. Even though you may have the flexibility, you don’t want to fall into the habit of changing up your schedule. You need to stay committed to the time that you block off for yourself and the people you serve. This time blocking technique can also be used to the time set aside for spending time with family and friends and exercise.

Boundaries to consider:

  • Are there any days you block off as days of rest?
  • When do you check and respond to emails?
  • Do you check voicemail messages and answer them on the weekend?

Business is business. Friendship is friendship. You have grown your business to where it is now. You put in long hours may have spent a lot of money and time on training and suddenly people want to start picking your brain and they’re asking for extras. I learned a long time ago that this devalues a person’s worth. Even though you want to help a friend, you do need to set boundaries. You’re in business to make money and not to give away your content and knowledge for free. Chances are the other person will not be sharing or providing their service or product for free. There has to be a win-win otherwise people will take advantage of you. There are ways to create a win-win through volunteering or trading services. It is up to you what you want to share and help with. Remember your worth and value in the marketplace. Teach people how to treat you and when you’re in business you are there to serve but also to make money otherwise is just a hobby.

“The most important distinction anyone can ever make in their life is between who they are as an individual and their connection with others.”
― Anné Linden, Boundaries in Human Relationships: How to Be Separate and Connected

Boundaries to consider:

  • Is sharing your knowledge creating a win-win situation?
  • Are you in business to make money or is it a hobby?
  • Have you set clear expectations between friendship and business?

Learn to say no. You need to set clear expectations about what you are willing and able to do in your business versus what you can do. Just because you have a skill set that doesn’t mean you should be doing it all. Delegation is a key strength to increasing productivity and boosting performance in business. Not only are you saying no to things that you need to stop doing, you are also saying no to activities and tasks that do not utilize your strengths. Focusing on your strengths improve your business.

“if you want to live an authentic, meaningful life, you need to master the art of disappointing and upsetting others, hurting feelings, and living with the reality that some people just won’t like you. It may not be easy, but it’s essential if you want your life to reflect your deepest desires, values, and needs.”
― Cheryl Richardson, The Art of Extreme Self-Care: Transform Your Life One Month at a Time

Boundaries to consider:

  • Is there anything in your business you need to stop doing or delegate?
  • Are there any clients that are not the right fit for your business that you need to let go of?
  • What activities and have are you willing and able to do to best serve your customers or clients?

Setting boundaries not only teaches people how to treat you. Boundaries help you establish guidelines for yourself for what you are willing to do and what you’re not willing to do. Therefore you’re not compromising your core values. The clearer you are on who you are and what your company represents, the more respect you earn.

Although this seems a bit stringent, you will find that more people will actually be attracted to your business and find it more appealing because you offer structure, you have rules in which everyone will be treated the same, you abide by core values, and you are professional and respectful in your approach.

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com