Above Mediocrity: How are You Measuring Up to Your Potential?
Do you ever wonder how you are measuring up to your potential? Do you think you’re taking enough action and stepping out of your comfort zone? Do you ever wonder what the secret to success is?
You’re not alone. Many people have studied success for years. I myself have been studying success for over 20 years.
What it really comes down to is a person’s daily habits, attitude, and expectations that they set for themselves. If you truly want to be noticed and stand out from the crowd you cannot settle for mediocrity. People start to get comfortable, complacent, and maybe even a little lazy when it comes to expanding and stepping into their potential. They talk a great talk but they’re not always willing to take the action required to sow the seeds that lead to success.
“The potential of the average person is like a huge ocean unsailed, a new continent unexplored, a world of possibilities waiting to be released and channeled toward some great good.” – Brian Tracy
Complacency creeps in when people stop expanding their social circles and networks, learning and growing in their area of expertise, stop appreciating others because they assume that you already know how they feel, and they put their health on the back burner. Over time, complacency can damage relationships, career growth, and your health. Isn’t it funny that many claim that these things are what matter most?
How are you measuring up?
Is it time to raise your bar of excellence?
Successful people do not strive for mediocrity or being average. They are looking for ways to be a little bit better today than they were yesterday. They are not willing to settle and fit in to what others say or think they should be like. Successful people do great things through small acts with intention and purpose.
You can start raising your bar of excellence by expecting more of yourself and inspiring others around you by the way you live in the choices you make.
Here are some simple ways in which you can start taking small steps to make big shifts in your relationships, your career growth, and your health. Focus on what you say is most important to you and you’ll reap rewards of happiness, health, and prosperity.
Read one nonfiction book per month. If you can read more books, fantastic! Increase your knowledge in your expertise or another area of interest. Commit to taking action on something learned in the book.
Connect with like-minded individuals. Join meet up groups, associations, and organization in which people have a common interest and also push you out of your comfort zone into dreaming and thinking bigger. You probably have heard the phrase that you are the average of the five people you hang out with the most. Surround yourself with people that you can learn from and who inspire you.
Develop your people skills. Many people take developing their people skills for granted. As you climb the ladder of success, the more people will not just focus on your skills and abilities and how smart you are, the more they look at how you interact with others. Learn to become a better communicator. Listen to the people you interact with. Put aside distractions and pay attention to the subtle tones and movements and body language. Always find a way to leave a conversation in which people are better because of your presence.
Become an action taker. Do not become known as someone who just talks about what they say they want to achieve. The most memorable people are the ones who take inspired action. People often hesitate because of the fear of failure; however, if you evaluate your probability of success you can start taking calculated risks. Each small success will build momentum. Success is short-lived by complacency. You will want to continue to challenge yourself and raise your bar of excellence.
“If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves.”-Thomas Edison
Hire a coach or find a mentor. You can accelerate your success by being coached through your challenges or being mentored by someone who has been where you want to be. Learn from these individuals and ask powerful questions to help you become more knowledgeable and resourceful.
Successful people do not try to do everything themselves nor do they try to take all the credit. They work with teams and incredible individuals who make them shine and raise their bar of excellence. When you take time to make these changes in yourself and look after your health, you will become an unstoppable force to be reckoned with. When you start taking one action each day, you will be taking 365 more actions than many people who are wishing for things to happen. Instead of wishing, you will be making things happen. Everyone has the same amount of time in their day but the difference maker is someone who takes action.
DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. She is a contributing writer for Diversity Magazine and Fabulous at 50 magazine. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. www.debrakasowski.com
How to Cultivate the Leadership Skills of Your People
The constant debate of whether or not leaders are born or made is a challenge many organizations face. Many organizations are driven to perform, produce, and profit. After all, you are not in business unless your business is making money.
If you are a leader, you know you cannot motivate anyone to do anything but you can “flick the light switch” for that “ah-ha” moment by askin
g questions and encouraging self-reflection. There are several ways you can cultivate leadership skills in your people.
Create a Strong Vision. If the people you lead can see themselves engaged in your vision, you will have willing participants. However, if they cannot see where they fit into your plan, you may encounter resistance or cynicism. A strong vision gives people something to look forward to in anticipation.
“It’s not what the vision is, it’s what the vision does.” – Peter Senge
Offer Educational Opportunities. Education comes in a variety of forms: TED Talks, Journals, Leadership Books, Case Studies, Audio books, You Tube Videos, Workshops, and Conferences. Encourage book discussions or presentations on a workshop they have attended. When your people are learning and growing so is your organization. Education is often one of the first areas cut when their needs to be a cost savings when it should be the last. You never know what creative ideas your people may come up with when they have new knowledge and develop their competencies.
Make Mentorship or Coaching Available. A mentor or coach can help answer questions and challenge assumptions. They can act as a strategic thinking partner. A mentor can share their personal experiences about how he or she handled a particular situation. Whereas, a coach ask questions that encourage self-reflection about potential next steps. Growth is accelerated when you have this type of support system in place.
Encourage Open Communication. Create opportunities for your people to share their successes and challenges so others can learn from them. Take time to acknowledge their efforts. You create unity among team members when they feel their voice and ideas are heard and considered. When your people know that you value them, they will be more engaged in supporting the vision.
“Leaders who make it a practice to draw out the thoughts and ideas of their subordinates and who are receptive even to bad news will be properly informed. Communicate downward to subordinates with at least the same care and attention as you communicate upward to superiors.” – L.B. Belker
Allow for creativity and calculated risk. Organizations advance when they allow their people to get creative and express their ideas. As a leader, you can ask questions so they evaluate the risks and benefits of their ideas. If you do not allow for creativity, other organizations will surpass your organization.
It is important to tap into the diversity of organization. Take time to learn about the knowledge, skills, and abilities the people in your organization have. Some people may be savvy in social media or have strong writing skills but their current role does not allow for them to showcase these talents. As a leader, we need to discover some of these hidden gems that may propel your organization forward. Working from a place of strength is one of the most powerful ways to grow your organization so that it is performing, producing, and profiting. It begins with developing your people.
DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. She is a contributing writer for Diversity Magazine and Fabulous at 50 magazine. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. www.debrakasowski.com
Are You Punishing Yourself from Being Successful?
Sometimes fleeting thoughts can cause turmoil…
No one ever said that chasing your dreams would be a smooth ride. It is more like a roller-coaster full of ups and downs. Definitely not for the faint of heart but it can be exhausting to the point where you say “That’s it! I give up! If I shut everything down, everyone around me will either back off or be happier if I just stop all this nonsense.”
Before you do, I want you to stop for a minute. Let’s really think this through. Let’s say you do stop due to the pressure of your environment or the belief you have in yourself to make things happen. You may make the choice to do exactly that and accept a different routine as a new normal but eventually you will be miserable and potentially resentful for giving up on your dream or goal. Your unhappiness will overflow into all the other areas of your life: your decisions, the way you communicate with others, and your interpersonal relationships. If you try to please everyone else, you are suffocating your purpose and your passion. What are you teaching people around you? How is quitting going to serve you? Part of you will die.
There is a distinct difference between being no longer passionate about what you are doing and quitting because others do not want you to fail or they are worried about how you will change when you reach your goal. Take notice. Their fears have nothing to do with you! It is their stuff about how they feel about stepping out of their comfort zone and going after their dreams. People want you to succeed and they want to help but they also want to protect you from taking a risk and failing. The greatest thing about life’s failures is that you can get up, learn the lesson, try again or change things up. Surround yourself with people who believe, encourage, and support you and who would not ask you to quit.
You are sabotaging your own success when you step back or worse, stop taking action steps in order to calm the waters of other people’s fears, doubt, or criticism. The number one sign you could be sabotaging your own success is procrastination – basically, doing anything else more pleasurable other than what you need to be doing. Consistency is needed for success to be achieved. It is all the small action steps that set you up for achievement.
People may fall along the wayside for a short time or even longer. They may be caught up in a cycle of envy, unworthiness, or re-evaluation of their own lives. They may compare where they are to where you are. Their imagination could be running wild. They may have realized that they have settled or not challenged themselves or do not wish to do so. They may even think you no longer accept them as they are while you chase your goals. The funny thing is – we do not go after what we want to leave people behind. It is awfully lonely if we cannot share our successes with others.
Stop punishing yourself! Let the way you live inspire others. Recognize everyone is on their own journey. We do not have the same passions or purpose. Holding yourself back to please others does not serve any one. You have set the bar for yourself – do not lower it. Encourage others to raise their own standards of what they expect of themselves. You are not the judge – they are. The goals and dreams you are pursuing are YOURS and no one else’s. If you do not follow your passions and what you believe to be your purpose, we all lose. Punishing yourself to fit into the crowd serves no one.
Be the best version of yourself by being the person you know yourself to be. Your happiness will flood the hearts of all you interact with.
Please comment and share with others so they do not stop chasing their dreams.
DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. She is a contributing writer for Diversity Magazine and Fabulous at 50 magazine. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. www.debrakasowski.com
Raise Your Emotional Self-Awareness and Eliminate Your Blind Spots
Our emotions play a significant part in the quality of our lives. Self-help author Brian Tracy said that the quality of your life is determined by how you feel about yourself. In business and sometimes in life, you may find it difficult to talk about emotions. People often get uncomfortable with the “touchy-feely” side of interpersonal relationships. People skills, often referred to as soft skills, are a key component in improving the quality of your life. Many people look to external factors to improve the quality and happiness in their lives. However, the one person who can change everything is the person looking back at you in the mirror.
Self-awareness begins with knowing who you are, what’s important to you, and what motivates you. It is also about knowing how you feel about yourself and the actions you will take to move forward. In today’s society, people seem to be moving at warp speed and do not take the time to reflect and learn from their mistakes, about their likes and dislikes, and also set goals for achievement. Some are so driven to succeed they fail to see the impact on the people around them. They have blind spots in which they do not see or understand their own behaviors and how they impact others. Guess what? We all have blind spots.
Chairman and cofounder of Seattle’s Pacific Institute Lou Tice used the term “scotoma” the term that describes the blind spot within the eye’s visual field caused by a physical defect or disease.” In his terms, scotoma is anything that keeps us from proceeding or understanding the truth. Tice explained that we create these” blind spots” ourselves so we can hold onto our version of reality, our beliefs about ourselves and the world. By doing so, we can avoid or ignore examining who we truly are. We tend to accept what we know is the truth; however, we are much more complex.
Blind spots are critical areas of growth. A person’s blind spot develops from an awareness gap between how you see yourself and help others see your strengths and weaknesses. The more you understand how your thoughts impact your behaviors, the better your outcomes will be. Emotions come from within and no one can make you feel a certain way. The way you feel about a situation or who you are will impact the actions you take. Developing or raising your self-awareness is vital in improving who you are and your quality of life. You cannot change what you are unaware of. You could be sabotaging your results by pretending not to see what is glaring to everyone else.
By raising your emotional self-awareness, you can make better choices and become more decisive about the actions you will take. These choices and actions can impact a range of outcomes from who you choose to marry, hire for the position, or improve your health. You will become more present and more aware of yourself and your impact on others.
Pay attention to how you feel throughout your day. Name and claim the emotion you are feeling. When you are able to recognize the emotion that you are feeling, you are better able to manage and understand why this feeling arose. Own your emotions by using “I” statements -this can be very empowering. You can describe your feelings versus placing judgment on yourself or others. For example, you could say, “I feel lonely eating supper by myself.” instead of “You make me feel alone when I eat supper myself.” “You” statements tend to put people on the defensive as they feel like they are blamed or shamed for their actions. Remember people cannot dictate how you feel about a certain situation. You can tell them how you feel and set expectations for future interactions.
Raise your self-awareness by discovering what your blind spots may be and eliminating them.
Start with self-reflection. You can do this by setting aside 15 to 20 minutes a day to sit in silence and think about your actions, who you are, what’s important to you and what motivates you. Why do you do what you do? What makes you jump out of bed in the morning?
Ink your thoughts on paper. Take time to journal and reflect on what is working in your life and what is not working your life. Think about how you feel and how you would like to feel. What do you need to do to feel the way you want to?
Ask for feedback. What are you pretending not to know about yourself? How might you be sabotaging your own success? When you ask someone you know, like, and trust about your blind spot, they can bring it into your awareness and gives you the ability to make a change. This feedback gives you the ability to acknowledge your strengths and improve your weaknesses as well as develop strategies for improvement. You may even choose to ask to be coached when the blind spot surfaces.
Raising your emotional self-awareness allows you to be accountable and responsible for the impact your emotions play in driving your actions. People skills matter. Eliminating your blind spots can improve the quality of your life. You will be more self-aware and can feel better about who you are because you have the ability to make choices and adjust when required. The smallest adjustment or change can make the biggest impact in how you show up in the world. It all begins with you!
DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and certified executive coach. She is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence – EQi -2.0/EQ360. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. www.debrakasowski.com