Whether you are in the boardroom or having a one on one conversation, building trust and rapport is key in getting someone to open up to you and share their ideas and opinions. People will not disclose anything to you if they do not feel safe. Sharing their ideas and opinions makes them vulnerable and open to judgment. Why would someone want to put themselves out there knowing that they would not be listened to or criticized?

You want to be able to create an atmosphere where people feel safe brainstorming, sharing ideas, and exploring opportunities. When you can do this, you can have deeper more meaningful conversations. You can establish buy-in in the direction you are heading. You can mitigate risks than you may not have seen coming. You will welcome more engagement and participation in strategic planning and meetings. Now, how do you do it?

Pay Attention to How You Say Things   

The way you communicate speaks volumes, particularly in your body language. Body language accounts for 55 percent of your communication, followed by 38 percent tone of voice, and 7 percent words. When someone shares an idea or offers an opinion you do not agree with or have reservations about, do you catch yourself rolling your eyes? Cross your arms or legs? Eye rolling discounts what the other person is saying. Basically saying, “Whatever, like that’s going to work?” Crossing your arms or legs creates a barrier and can be a sign of defensiveness. Keep your eyes engaged with the person sharing ideas. Be observant. Look at their body language as they share and listen to their tone of voice. If you want people to open up to you, you need to be open. Lean in, maintain eye contact (not a stare down), and truly listen.

Put the Agenda Aside and Ask Open Ended Questions

Asking open ended questions to gather a person’s point of view can make person feel important and what they have to say matters – because it does. When you come in with an agenda, people can sense that whatever they say will be disregarded. They know if you have a hidden agenda. Face it we all have agendas. If you want to build trust and openness, you need to put the agenda aside and be open – even if you may not like the answers. You may get feedback that can change your approach to a situation. Put people in the driver’s seat and ask questions like: “If you owned this company and it was your money, what action would you take to get the greatest return on investment?” Or, “I would really like your input on something, what do you think…”.

Be Willing to Be Teachable and Coachable

As a leader, people may suspect you know all the answers. You know you cannot have all the answers; however, you do know how to build a team and gather resources to find the answers. If you do not know the answer say so, do not fake knowing the answer. Humbly admit it and be willing to learn. Ask individuals tell you more about how something works or their next steps. You can gain an understanding of what they are thinking and the actions they are planning to take. You can ask thoughtful questions that offer a different point of view, challenge assumptions, and affirm the direction a person is heading. Admitting to not know everything and being willing to learn or be coached builds trust. This admission makes you relatable and on an equal playing field.

Make a commitment to yourself that you are going to carve out time in your busy schedule to walk around and learn about the people you work in partnership with. Productivity increases when people are doing work that they feel makes a difference. Why not show them that they matter by communicating openly, asking thought-provoking questions, and being open to hearing the responses and engaging meaningful conversation. People will begin to open up and share when they feel when you do not come with a hidden agenda and they feel safe and free from judgment and criticism.

Debra Kasowski, the charismatic host of the thought-provoking podcast, The Millionaire Woman Show, is committed to enriching the leadership potential of her countless clients, essentially guiding them to go within to capitalize on their true personal power, so they can achieve the measurable success they desire in business, and in life. After graduating with distinction, having earned a Bachelor of Science in Nursing, this award winning, three-time bestselling author, speaker and Certified Executive Coach spent many years as a clinical manager exceling in leadership development, before founding Debra Kasowski International, a world-class training and consulting venture focused on helping aspiring business owners and solopreneurs develop the winning “success habits” that transform human potential into sustainable profits.
Clearly, if you’re motivated to move beyond the mediocre, inspired to forge on to the forefront with a proven plan of action, there’s no doubt that the indomitable Debra Kasowski is your solution.www.debrakasowski.com