Debra Kasowski

EPISODE 133 – Pay Attention to Achieve a New Level of Thinking

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“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” ― Albert Einstein

What we think about influences how we feel and the actions we take. When you think positive thoughts, you feel great and are more likely to take the actions necessary to get the results you want. When you get caught up in negative thinking, you feel frustrated, disappointed, and even let your imagination run wild with all the possibilities of what you think can be occurring. Most of the time, unless when you confirm those thoughts, you will find out you were totally off base. You need to be careful so you are no sabotaging yourself from achieving your own success. If you want to achieve a new level of thinking, you need to start paying attention. Positive change starts with focusing on yourself not looking to change others. What can you do?

Pay Attention to Your Language

Are you using empowering or disempowering language? Are you coming up with excuses or reasons you believe you are not achieving your success? Are you blaming or complaining seeing others as the cause of your situation?

Stop and listen to yourself. What do you hear yourself saying?

Do you look at the “To-Do” list and say, “I have to do this.”, begrudgingly? It sounds like a chore. Do you ever look at that “To-Do” list and say, “I get to!” I get to mow the lawn. It means I own a home where I have my own green space. I get to buy groceries. It means I have food accessible to me. I get to chose food that will fuel my body. Notice when you shift your thinking and statements, you empower yourself with a choice.

Here’s another one:

When you are asked to do something even it could be a benefit to your career or business, do you say “I can’t do it. – I have no time, I am busy.” We all have the same 24 hours in a day. What you are really saying is that you chose NOT to. It is not about capability- it is about capacity. What are you willing to do? If something is important to you, you will make time. When I say make time, I mean, a block of a certain amount of time to dedicate it to your task. You need to start moving things off the “To-Do” list and start moving them into your calendar. You CAN do what you CHOOSE to do.

Are you shutting down opportunities because all you see is one barrier after the next? This focus is called resistance. Why are you resisting? There is more that one way to achieve your goals. Look for all the possible options. When you are solution-focused, you will find solutions. When you look for barriers, you will find all the obstacles in your way. What is one opportunity you have in front of you right now that you may have been resisting? Do you need to stop doing something or start doing something? All change can feel uncomfortable but the results are priceless. Start small – test a solution and adjust the course as you go.

There are many more disempowering words, all you have to do is pay attention to how you feel when you say them. Do you feel uplifted and empowered or do you feel like you are dragged down?

Pay Attention to What is Influencing YOU

There are many factors that influence the way you think, feel, and act on any given day. Some contributing factors are internal influences such as your beliefs, thoughts, and feelings. There are some external influences that influence you such as the people you surround yourself with, the books you read, the music you listen to, and the television you watch.

Everything begins with a choice. You can reframe negative thoughts to positive ones. You can challenge self-limiting beliefs and form new beliefs. You can surround yourself with people who encourage and support you or distance yourself from others who do not. You can read books in business or industry that will get you thinking in new ways and lead to stimulating discussions. You can listen to audiobooks in your vehicle as you drive. Feed your mind empowering content and you will start thinking at a new level. You will start taking actions that get you closer to your goals instead of farther away.

Make choices based on your values, not how you feel “at the moment.” When people are in a high emotional state, they do not think clearly. A part of the brain called the amygdala is hijacked from rational thought so you may say or do things that you will later regret. When your emotions are high, it is best to slow down your thoughts and give yourself some time to calm down before taking any actions. Are you focused on your core values and how you want to be known?

Pay Attention to Where You are Putting YOUR ENERGY & FOCUS

Roy Bennett said, “If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.” If you are focused on your past, you cannot fully live in the present or plan for the future. You have the same story playing over and over in your head of what is possible and what is not possible. Change your story. You are the author of your life write how you want it to go. Do not focus on your current situation as all you will see is what is. Focus on what you want to achieve and how to get there. Energy flows to what you focus on. Focus on how you need to BE and what you need to DO to HAVE what you want.

To start achieving a new level of thinking, you must start with YOU! Pay attention to your language, your influences, and where you are putting your energy and focus as they are all influencing the actions you take and the results you are getting.

What are you going to pay attention to?

Special Announcement – New Book and Format for Podcast!

We would love to have you subscribe to the Success Secrets newsletter on my website at www.debrakasowski.com where you’re going to get my just release FREE e-book about the 21 Habits High Achievers Kick to Achieve Success. I would love to hear about this podcast has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Share it with Your Friends. Give us a 5-star rating!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free e-book download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Episode 98 -The Power of Positivity with Jon Gordon

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Meet Our Guest:

Jon Gordon’s best-selling books and talks have inspired readers and audiences around the world. His principles have been put to the test by numerous NFL, NBA, MLB coaches and teams, Fortune 500 companies, school districts, hospitals and non-profits. He is the author of numerous best-selling books including The Energy Bus, The Carpenter, Training Camp, The Seed, You Win in the Locker Room First and The Power of Positive Leadership. Jon and his tips have been featured on The Today Show, CNN, CNBC, The Golf Channel, Fox and Friends and in numerous magazines and newspapers. His clients include The Los Angeles Dodgers, The Atlanta Falcons, Campbell Soup, Dell, Publix, Southwest Airlines, LA Clippers, Miami Heat, Pittsburgh Pirates, BB&T Bank, Clemson Football, Northwestern Mutual, Bayer, West Point Academy and more.

Jon is a graduate of Cornell University and holds a Masters in Teaching from Emory University. He and his training/consulting company are passionate about developing positive leaders, organizations and teams.

Episode 93 – Silence Your Inner Critic

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Each of us has an inner voice. Some people refer to it as the inner voice of knowing- but does it really know, especially when the negative thoughts rear their ugly heads. Isn’t bad enough you wonder what other people are saying about you or the efforts you put out? You don’t need any extra judgment as you already are your own worst critic. There are times you say things to yourself that you would not voice out loud and direct at anyone else. Why? The inner critic is not compassionate, kind, or respectful. If you wouldn’t say it to anyone else, why say such mean things to yourself. It’s not that you are wanting to get rid of the inner voice, you are managing the negative thoughts.

When you are in a negative state of mind, you will take actions to support your thoughts and feelings, ultimately, impacting the results you are getting. You need to stop the critic because it crushes your self-confidence to take essential actions required to achieve results. Think of your radio dial; you can tune into music and messaging that you choose to listen to. Many of the messages in your mind have been forged from the past and no longer serve the current situation. It may have come from criticism or advice. You may hear the voice of your mother or father commenting on something and you have hung onto to it. Now in the present something comes up and you think it must be true because someone else has said it even it does not even fit the current situation.

You want to be able to silence the inner critic, the chatter, you hear in your head. Managing the thoughts, you are having is not as difficult as you think. Your mind is flooded with over 50,000-70,000 thoughts in a day with many of them being negativity. Most of these thoughts are unconscious until you bring them into your awareness. As soon as you bring a thought into your awareness, you can make a conscious choice whether you want to keep the thought or reject it. Unfortunately, you may grab a single negative thought and play it in your head like a broken record. It does not serve you – it is time to manage your thoughts and toss those negative ones away altogether.

“If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month.”
― Theodore Roosevelt

It all begins with…self-awareness.

What thoughts are you thinking? Once you can notice your thoughts in the moment, now you can change them but before you do, why are you having them, to begin with? Is your self-confidence low? Is fear coming up? Even though negative thoughts come up and their many have been moments that you tell yourself, “I am stupid.”, you need to stop and remember there also have been a time you have shined and felt on top of the world. You are not stupid – your behavior or action you took was not the right one now.

When you catch yourself saying a negative thought, STOP and take notice of it. You can say, “Cancel, cancel, cancel”. Your thoughts are powerful. Your thoughts influence the actions you are going to take. If you are in a bad mood, you may react to a situation or say things you would later regret.

REFRAME the thought into a positive thought. Positive thoughts lead to positive actions. Positive actions will get you closer to the success you are looking for. The reason people do not achieve the success they are looking for is often because the get caught up in the stories they tell themselves.

Get into a positive state of mind. When I studied the morning routines of successful people, I learned that they put themselves into a positive state. To get yourself into a positive state, you can pray or meditate, exercise, write in a gratitude journal, or read a book that gets your mind primed for the day. The morning is not the only time you can do this. You can change your state by simply thinking of a time where you felt unstoppable and you felt at the peak of success.

Your inner voice is not a bad thing…it can warn you or alert you to doing your due diligence. It is a bad thing when you allow thoughts to take root and sabotage your efforts. You need to remind yourself that you have greatness within you – everyone does. Holding back on your greatness serves no one – if you hold back – it is a tragedy. Everything in life is interconnected. If you do not fulfill your purpose, others are impeded from fulfilling theirs.

Make a choice. Your imagination can run wild if you let it. Telling you stories of disempowerment. You need to harness your thoughts and empower yourself. You can break down your stories and examine the words that you use. The word “Can’t” places limits on what you believe is possible and what you think you are capable of doing. Yes, there are somethings that you can’t do such as swim without oxygen in the depth of the sea or fly above the mountains like an eagle. There are things you can do and you are stopping yourself from doing them.

Can’t is a choice. You are choosing not to. Do you notice when you have a choice you suddenly have empowered yourself and taken control of the actions you are taking? What CAN you do? Stephen King said, “you can, you should, and if you’re brave enough to start, you will.” Focus on what you can do versus what you cannot.

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t—you’re right.”
― Henry Ford

You have more power than you give yourself credit for. When you pay attention to what you are saying and how those words make you feel and the thoughts you are having, you can start taking actions that support your success rather than sabotage it.

Be Aware -Notice and Understand It.

Stop – Cancel the thought.

Reframe It.

Get into a positive state.

CHOOSE – what you are going to say and do that will empower you!

We would love to have you subscribed to the Success Secrets newsletter on my website at www.debrakasowski.com where you’re going to get us free MP3 download 10 Surefire Strategies to Power Up Your Productivity and Performance. I would love to hear about this podcast has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Share it with Your Friends. Give us a 5-star rating!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

 

 

 

 

Why Your Attitude Matters

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Although skill, ability, and having the right opportunity seem to be stepping stones to success, the one game-changing quality that makes the biggest difference is a person’s attitude. A person’s attitude will determine their altitude in achieving success. If someone needed a tiebreaker in determining the best-qualified candidate for the position, the selection would come down to a person’s attitude. Your attitude is how you approach life.

“Life is 10 percent what you make it
and 90 percent how you take it.”
― Irving Berlin

Attitude Awareness

Attitude is one of the most important predictors of your success. Your perspective on life will determine how you cope with trials and triumphs of life. Your attitude awareness impacts your thoughts and how you feel. How you feel you translate into your actions. If you are feeling positive and upbeat, you are more likely to greet people with a compliment or a simple, “Good Day!” instead of responding negatively, “What makes it a good day?” People are attracted to positive energy; they want to be around people who uplift them and make them feel good about themselves and the world around them.

When you recognize the attitude that you are portraying, you can adjust it accordingly when you notice that it’s tending to the negative. Negativity as well is positivity can permeate the environment around you. As a leader, you want to ensure that you bring forth a positive attitude so that the people who follow you do so in turn. This impacts the people that you serve not only each other but who you’re ultimately there for.

Attitude Determines Your Resiliency

Your attitude is a foundation to your success. Although we would love for life to stay at the all-time high, we know that everyone in life faces challenges. It is how we move through that challenge that makes the difference. Attitude is a choice. Sometimes you may forget that you have a choice as to what attitude you wish to have. When you realize that you have a choice, you can then get on the right track. You become more resilient when you choose a positive outlook because you will be open to possibility and opportunity. If you choose to have a negative outlook on life you will be inclined to focus on problems, not solutions. Seeing the possibilities encourages creativity and innovation and allows you to move through challenges more quickly.

Attitude Conquers Fear

Developing a positive attitude means that you are developing an attitude that is stronger in faith than the fear. When people make decisions or take actions based on fear, they often make the wrong choices and do not get the results or outcomes that they hoped for. When you are able to maintain a positive attitude, you are not driven solely on the emotion you are able to look at facts, and you’re able to think clearly about what direction you want to take. Your attitude will determine how persistent you will be in the face of obstacles and you will be able to trust yourself and your ability to move through them. You have faced obstacles before. Think about the patterns and your approach to how you face those obstacles in the past. They will help you determine some of the actions that you need to do moving forward when making decisions or taking the next steps. Be open to new information that will support you in reaching the outcomes you want to achieve. Let your faith in yourself and your people be stronger than the fear of uncertainty or failure.

“We cannot change our past… we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you… we are in charge of our Attitudes.”
― Charles R. Swindoll

The attitude that you choose to have can take you on the ascent of new heights or can pull the rug from under you and descend you to the beginning. Your attitude is a choice. A choice to rise above any challenges you face and to persevere knowing that you will achieve what you go after.

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Debra is the host of The Millionaire Woman Show podcast focusing on helping people live rich from the inside out through leadership, business, and human potential. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

EPISODE 22: Focus on What You Want

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Episode 22: Focus on What You Want

“If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.”
― Roy Bennett

There are so many things going on in our daily lives that we’re distracted from being focused and being in the present moment. Look around you there are some people who are super focused; they know exactly what they want and are driven to succeed. Then there are others who don’t know what they want to appear to be stumbling through life. Which person are you?

Do not be dismayed if you find yourself being the person with lack of focus. By listening to this podcast you’ll find ways to zoom in on your focus.

Knowing what you want gives you clarity. Everything around you becomes clearer. You know what goals you want and decision-making becomes easy. When you’re unclear, it kind of feels like walking around in the dark where you don’t know exactly where you’re going and can stub your toe. You can get clear by just sitting down and writing out what it is you want. Don’t judge or critique your and writing. Don’t worry about spelling or grammar. Keep writing!

Catch your thoughts and shift. In Episode 13 The Power Of Positive Thinking we talked about how we have 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts in a day and that 80% of those thoughts were negative. When you realize you are having negative thoughts and you are self-aware of them, you have the ability to change thought. You can shift gears or flip the light switch in your thought process. As you notice the negative thoughts, you can either accept it or you can reject it. Reframe the thoughts into something more positive. It really comes down to focusing on what you want and not what you don’t want

What do you think happens when you focus on what you don’t want? Worries, fears, anxiety, self-doubt, and your internal critic pops its head and that’s all we see. As you focus on what you don’t want, your action star reflecting your thoughts and you self-sabotage yourself from getting what you really want. There is so much power in the way you think. I cannot stress enough how much you need to be paying attention to how your thinking. It impacts everything you do. You end up joining the ancient awful club and feel awful. Your mind thinks that’s what you want. Worrying just attracts problems and notice you don’t worry about what outcomes you want. You only end up worrying about what you lack which ends up bringing you more lack.

When you experience resistance, there is often a misalignment with your values and who you want to be. This internal conflict is alerting you to the fact that you’re focusing on the wrong things. You need to start focusing on what you can control versus what you cannot.

Energy flows where your attention goes. What are you paying attention to? The reticular activating system (RAS) is our brain’s attention center. It is the place where our thoughts and feelings interact with their outside world and how we interpret it. If you focus on your past and see your past with regret, your actions will not move you forward toward renewed future.

Esther Hicks said, “A belief is a thought you keep thinking and things actualize around it to confirm that thought.” When you put a spotlight on something, you will find evidence and rationale to make that thought your truth. It becomes your reality. focus perspectiveHowever, if you change your focus by looking at other perspectives and choose a reality that you truly want, you will find evidence and rationale that supports that truth. Whatever you believe becomes your reality. You need to lock into the thoughts that you want and get really focused on where you want to go with your thoughts and the actions you will be taking.

You may be telling yourself right now that I don’t like my reality. Your reality may be your present or remember no moment is permanent. You can either accept your reality as it is or choose different thoughts to feel differently and you will start taking actions to match your new belief. You need to believe in your reality and that you can always improve. No matter if it is a positive or negative moment is temporary. Whatever you believe your reality to be will be the story that you share and tell yourself.

TMW_PDFclickhere.fwThe trouble is and that people get caught up in comparing themselves to others through social media and real life. For professionals, many individuals saw social media as a form of showcasing their skills, talents, and abilities and making them stand out from the crowd. Some individuals have used social media to compare their lives to the lives of others. Have you noticed that people post all the great things about what’s going on in their lives? You are comparing yourself to a moment in time and not their whole life timeline. You may see exotic travels, celebrations with friends, and other things that you may long for. This comparison can make people feel depressed if they choose to and they will not take actions that support what they want. When you compare yourself to others you are focusing on another person’s reality and what they believe to be true.

I want to ask you some questions to help you get clear and focus on what you want.

What action will give you your greatest return on investment of your time money and other resources? These are the needle-movers or the game-changers. Are you taking the right actions?

What are the things that are distracting you?

What thoughts are you having? Are you experiencing worry fear and self-doubt? It just means that you’re focusing on what you don’t want. Shift the thought and change your actions.

Here are some things to help you get laser focused and get what you want:

Get super clear on what it is that you want. Write it down.

Accept what is and create the reality that you wish to see. Don’t worry about what everyone else’s thinking or doing. Their opinion applies to them and not to you. People’s advice comes from their own experiences and fears. Choose what you want to accept and what you choose to reject as truth.

Visualize the results that you want.

Prioritize tasks and things you need to get done.

Prepare for what you want and need by gathering resources, accumulating knowledge, and developing your skills and abilities.

Eliminate your distractions and interruptions. Don’t check your e-mail in the morning until you have done some focused work. No e-mail or texting and tell the task is done.

Remove any clutter on your desk or in your space. You may develop the urge to start cleaning it or start working on another project.

Learn to say “no”. You cannot be all things to all people and accomplish what you want to get done for yourself. By focusing on pleasing others, you may lose focus on who you are and what you wanted to accomplish. I’m not saying you shouldn’t help people. There is a difference between helping others and living a life doing what others want for you. By living a life of pleasing others you please no one because other people have different expectations than what you do.

“Focusing is about saying No.”
― Steve Jobs

Take a break every hour for about 5 to 10 min. In order for your focus to be sustainable, you must take a break to recharge and rejuvenate. Your mind does need some time to wander and generate new ideas. You often get a fresh perspective when you come back and look at what you’re focused on.

Take actions that support what you are working toward achieving. You will notice that you will be more productive and efficient with your time, talent and efforts.

Change your focus to what you want and not on what you don’t want – for it will become your reality.

Don’t forget to grab your free DOWNLOAD to help you

get focused on what you want.

I would love to hear about how focusing on what you want has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Give us a 5-star rating! Sign up for our Newsletter www.debrakasowski.com

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Time 12:15 mins