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EPISODE 22: Focus on What You Want

August 30, 2016 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

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Episode 22: Focus on What You Want

“If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.”
― Roy Bennett

There are so many things going on in our daily lives that we’re distracted from being focused and being in the present moment. Look around you there are some people who are super focused; they know exactly what they want and are driven to succeed. Then there are others who don’t know what they want to appear to be stumbling through life. Which person are you?

Do not be dismayed if you find yourself being the person with lack of focus. By listening to this podcast you’ll find ways to zoom in on your focus.

Knowing what you want gives you clarity. Everything around you becomes clearer. You know what goals you want and decision-making becomes easy. When you’re unclear, it kind of feels like walking around in the dark where you don’t know exactly where you’re going and can stub your toe. You can get clear by just sitting down and writing out what it is you want. Don’t judge or critique your and writing. Don’t worry about spelling or grammar. Keep writing!

Catch your thoughts and shift. In Episode 13 The Power Of Positive Thinking we talked about how we have 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts in a day and that 80% of those thoughts were negative. When you realize you are having negative thoughts and you are self-aware of them, you have the ability to change thought. You can shift gears or flip the light switch in your thought process. As you notice the negative thoughts, you can either accept it or you can reject it. Reframe the thoughts into something more positive. It really comes down to focusing on what you want and not what you don’t want

What do you think happens when you focus on what you don’t want? Worries, fears, anxiety, self-doubt, and your internal critic pops its head and that’s all we see. As you focus on what you don’t want, your action star reflecting your thoughts and you self-sabotage yourself from getting what you really want. There is so much power in the way you think. I cannot stress enough how much you need to be paying attention to how your thinking. It impacts everything you do. You end up joining the ancient awful club and feel awful. Your mind thinks that’s what you want. Worrying just attracts problems and notice you don’t worry about what outcomes you want. You only end up worrying about what you lack which ends up bringing you more lack.

When you experience resistance, there is often a misalignment with your values and who you want to be. This internal conflict is alerting you to the fact that you’re focusing on the wrong things. You need to start focusing on what you can control versus what you cannot.

Energy flows where your attention goes. What are you paying attention to? The reticular activating system (RAS) is our brain’s attention center. It is the place where our thoughts and feelings interact with their outside world and how we interpret it. If you focus on your past and see your past with regret, your actions will not move you forward toward renewed future.

Esther Hicks said, “A belief is a thought you keep thinking and things actualize around it to confirm that thought.” When you put a spotlight on something, you will find evidence and rationale to make that thought your truth. It becomes your reality. focus perspective However, if you change your focus by looking at other perspectives and choose a reality that you truly want, you will find evidence and rationale that supports that truth. Whatever you believe becomes your reality. You need to lock into the thoughts that you want and get really focused on where you want to go with your thoughts and the actions you will be taking.

You may be telling yourself right now that I don’t like my reality. Your reality may be your present or remember no moment is permanent. You can either accept your reality as it is or choose different thoughts to feel differently and you will start taking actions to match your new belief. You need to believe in your reality and that you can always improve. No matter if it is a positive or negative moment is temporary. Whatever you believe your reality to be will be the story that you share and tell yourself.

The trouble is and that people get caught up in comparing themselves to others through social media and real life. For professionals, many individuals saw social media as a form of showcasing their skills, talents, and abilities and making them stand out from the crowd. Some individuals have used social media to compare their lives to the lives of others. Have you noticed that people post all the great things about what’s going on in their lives? You are comparing yourself to a moment in time and not their whole life timeline. You may see exotic travels, celebrations with friends, and other things that you may long for. This comparison can make people feel depressed if they choose to and they will not take actions that support what they want. When you compare yourself to others you are focusing on another person’s reality and what they believe to be true.

I want to ask you some questions to help you get clear and focus on what you want.

What action will give you your greatest return on investment of your time money and other resources? These are the needle-movers or the game-changers. Are you taking the right actions?

What are the things that are distracting you?

What thoughts are you having? Are you experiencing worry fear and self-doubt? It just means that you’re focusing on what you don’t want. Shift the thought and change your actions.

Here are some things to help you get laser focused and get what you want:

Get super clear on what it is that you want. Write it down.

Accept what is and create the reality that you wish to see. Don’t worry about what everyone else’s thinking or doing. Their opinion applies to them and not to you. People’s advice comes from their own experiences and fears. Choose what you want to accept and what you choose to reject as truth.

Visualize the results that you want.

Prioritize tasks and things you need to get done.

Prepare for what you want and need by gathering resources, accumulating knowledge, and developing your skills and abilities.

Eliminate your distractions and interruptions. Don’t check your e-mail in the morning until you have done some focused work. No e-mail or texting and tell the task is done.

Remove any clutter on your desk or in your space. You may develop the urge to start cleaning it or start working on another project.

Learn to say “no”. You cannot be all things to all people and accomplish what you want to get done for yourself. By focusing on pleasing others, you may lose focus on who you are and what you wanted to accomplish. I’m not saying you shouldn’t help people. There is a difference between helping others and living a life doing what others want for you. By living a life of pleasing others you please no one because other people have different expectations than what you do.

“Focusing is about saying No.”
― Steve Jobs

Take a break every hour for about 5 to 10 min. In order for your focus to be sustainable, you must take a break to recharge and rejuvenate. Your mind does need some time to wander and generate new ideas. You often get a fresh perspective when you come back and look at what you’re focused on.

Take actions that support what you are working toward achieving. You will notice that you will be more productive and efficient with your time, talent and efforts.

Change your focus to what you want and not on what you don’t want – for it will become your reality.

Don’t forget to grab your free DOWNLOAD to help you

get focused on what you want.

I would love to hear about how focusing on what you want has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Give us a 5-star rating! Sign up for our Newsletter www.debrakasowski.com

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Time 12:15 mins

Why Optimism Beats Pessimism

July 20, 2016 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

You are faced with a variety of life events and circumstances every day. Each event or situation can be viewed in a positive or negative way. Your perspective is your outlook on the world around you. According to psychologists, you are either an optimist viewing the world from the viewpoint of a glass “half-full” or a pessimist viewing the world as a glass “half-empty”. For the most part, you are not happy or sad 100% of the time but you will lean more to one or the other disposition predominantly. Which one are you?

“Optimism is a strategy for making a better future. Because unless you believe that the future can be better, you are unlikely to step up and take responsibility for making it so.”
― Noam Chomsky

The Optimist

Optimism is defined as taking on a favorable view of events or circumstances and to expect positive outcomes. Optimistic character symbols are the fish Dory from the Disney Film Finding Nemo with her positive attitude and phrase, “Just Keep Swimming” demonstrating persistence. The Donkey from the movie Shrek does not seem to let anything bother him – everything just rolls off his back. The Disney character Goofy seems to do things without doubting of things with work out; he just does. You may see these characters as overly optimistic but it helps them face any adversity that comes their way.

Optimistic people look for the good in situations and believe that most people’s actions are filled with good intentions. They have a “can-do” attitude and see negative events as a temporary setback and see these hardships as learning opportunities for growth. They persist when faced with adversity. An optimistic person practices gratitude and acknowledges what is going well. They are positive and are confident in their abilities. When optimistic people share the events of their day, they tend to focus on sharing good events over negative ones. Uncertainty does not throw optimists off track; they see unscheduled or unplanned events as an opportunity and adventure to be seized.

The Pessimist

Pessimists are in the state of mind of expecting only the worst outcomes. These people have similar characteristics to the characters of Chicken Little who created a widespread panic that the sky was falling when it was only an acorn that fell, Charlie Brown was full of dread, negativity and worry, and Eeyore who was full of doom and gloom. People with these pessimistic characteristics can wear on the patience of others and suck the energy out of a room.

Pessimistic people believe that negative events were caused by them. What power they have! They believe that one mistake leads to a Domino Effect of mistakes. If something positive was to occur to them like a promotion or winning a prize, they would attribute these successes to luck, chance, or a fluke accident and the likelihood of it ever happening again was nearly impossible.

A pessimist can cause habit in the marketplace, business, or organization. They can negatively influence their employees, colleagues, and co-workers. I have watched this happen and it can move like wildfire. They start demonstrating poor work habits, carelessness, and lack of motivation. They become distracted and disengaged with the people who they are serving. Stress increase as these individuals gossip and complain. Others start to dread coming to work. They see setbacks as permanent and they are less flexible in challenging their perspective. There is increased fear, worry, and anxiety about the future which in turn impacts productivity and performance and thus the bottom line – profits.

Ultimately, optimism beats pessimism. Optimists live longer healthier lives. They have lower stress levels because they do not allow situations and life circumstances to dictate their happiness. They tend to be more successful and have increased productivity. Optimism impacts your overall well-being – it “feels good” to be positive and uplifting.

“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.”
― Mahatma Gandhi

Way to Beat the Doom and Gloom of Pessimism

Challenging assumptions by questioning your thoughts (Is your thought true?)
Reframe negative thoughts into positive thoughts
Learn from mistakes and adjust your course by doing it again until you get it
“Act as if”; be who you need to be now to achieve what you are trying to succeed at. Do not wait to be in the leadership role to become a leader.
Look for the good and what you have to be grateful for. The more you are grateful for, the more that will show up in your life to be grateful for.

Each day we have a choice. Which perspective will you choose – the optimist or the pessimist? At the end of the day, optimism beats pessimism. You cannot help wanting to be a part of the positive energy; it contagious. What attitude do you want to spread? How full or empty is your glass?

I believe it is not how full or empty your glass is what determines the quality of your life; it is about the people you meet, the places you travel to, and choices you choose to fill it with. Seize the opportunities live life to its fullest and drink up!

EPISODE 6: Boost Your Productivity and Performance

July 5, 2016 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

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“If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done.” – Bruce Lee

Productivity and performance can be a total game changer. We all have the same 24 hours in a day but some people seem to get more accomplished than others and others say, “I don’t get it. How do you get to do all that?” The secret lies in the sauce.

Boost productivity and performance is about blocking time. We cannot make more time. We all have the same amount of time but how do we structure the time that we have. How are we using it more effectively?

I have an awesome downloadable – Infographic for you!

DOWNLOAD HERE

There are many Time Tracking logs or apps out there. I have used time tracking for those people who claim that they are “so busy” and we hear people use the buzz word “busy”. I do make the attempt to track my time anytime I catch myself saying that I am busy. Busy is that buzz word but it is almost like an excuse for people not doing things. It is actually saying, “I do not want to do that” or “That’s not important to me.”

When you start tracking your time, you can start seeing where you are spending your time. You can do the same exercise by tracking the amount of water you drink, the workouts you want to have, or anywhere you want to make a change. If you start tracking it, anything that you track you are able to manage better. Start tracking your time for 3-7 days to see where you are actually spending your time and then you can adjust accordingly.

One of the great things I like to recommend to people is scheduling 30 minutes in the morning to start to plan your day and another 30 minutes at the end of the day to review and plan for the next day. You will be forward thinking, you are making the plan, and have an intended direction of where you want your day to go.

Make a list of all your priorities. What are the A-game changers where you are going to have the greatest return on your investment? This is where you need to be focusing your time. Focus on your priorities first.

Set office hours to eliminate distractions and interruptions. It is so easy for people to pop by and say you are working at home today or you don’t have office hours I can just pop in and have a casual chat. If you are in the middle of working on something important that you have a deadline, these interruptions can really suck some of the time that you have. Consider that when you are working on a big project there may be a time of the day where you just need to close your door.

Turn off notifications and email alerts on your smartphone and computer. BING! Every time you see one of those, it is a bright shiny object! BING! BING! BING! Or SQUIRREL – anything that takes you attention to a different place!

Block out time on your calendar to focus on high priority tasks. Block off dedicated time. Use a timer. You would be surprised how much you can accomplish in 20 minutes when you are trying to beat a clock.

Develop a system for managing information such as paper and emails so you only deal with it once if possible. Consider creating folder or filters to help sort emails. Do not hang on to emails that do not require a reply or that you can get the information somewhere else.

Delegate to others who have the knowledge, skills, and ability to get a task done so you can focus on high priority tasks requiring your expertise. I know sometimes we like to be in control and be the boss. If you want to be a smart boss you need to delegate some of that out. If people have the knowledge, skills, and ability, let them do the work that they love to do. You can focus on the work that is a high priority and you can focus on your expertise. Everybody is using their skills more effectively on a team.

Don’t schedule meetings unless they are necessary and they have a targeted agenda. Sometimes I think people throw up meetings just to have a meeting but then they get there, there is no focus or direction and they feel that people are just wasting their time. When they could be focusing on what is really important to them, what has pressing deadlines, and where they are going to get the greatest return on their investment? Ask yourself whether or not you can do a meeting over the phone versus driving to somewhere or taking up a lot of time. Sometimes it can be addressed in an email. Consider how you can respond so you can get to the meat of the matter very quickly.

FOCUS on ONE activity or task until completed…then REWARD yourself and CELEBRATE! It might be a stretch break or getting a coffee or a cup of tea giving you a small reward so you are focused on one activity. “If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done.” When you start doing too many things or multi-tasking, it divides your attention. Put your intention and attention to the place you want to get your results.

Try these 10 things and you will be boosting your productivity and performance and watch what happens to your results.

Be an implementer!

Email me at Debra@debrakasowski.com and let us know what you would like to be featured on the show. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Give us a 5-star rating!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Time 9:11 min

3 Ways to Establish Boundaries in Business

July 3, 2016 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

Sometimes the term “boundary” receives a negative connotation due to a meaning a limit and restriction. Boundaries are necessary in business in order to be more effective and productive with their time, money, and resources. Business owners often think that potential and current customers will be read held by a company or organization that has boundaries; however, this is not true.

“Time is the most valuable coin in your life. You and you alone will determine how that coin will be spent. Be careful that you do not let other people spend it for you.”
― Carl Sandburg

Here are three ways that you can get started by establishing boundaries in your business:

Set office hours. An open door policy is great but it can also take up a lot of time when conversations are more social rather than about business. Connecting with people is important however consider having a time limit on the social aspect and focus on the business at hand. For anyone working from home, boundaries are important because many people who see you working at home think that you are either not working or have the flexibility to change her schedule at a moment’s notice. Even though you may have the flexibility, you don’t want to fall into the habit of changing up your schedule. You need to stay committed to the time that you block off for yourself and the people you serve. This time blocking technique can also be used to the time set aside for spending time with family and friends and exercise.

Boundaries to consider:

Are there any days you block off as days of rest?
When do you check and respond to emails?
Do you check voicemail messages and answer them on the weekend?

Business is business. Friendship is friendship. You have grown your business to where it is now. You put in long hours may have spent a lot of money and time on training and suddenly people want to start picking your brain and they’re asking for extras. I learned a long time ago that this devalues a person’s worth. Even though you want to help a friend, you do need to set boundaries. You’re in business to make money and not to give away your content and knowledge for free. Chances are the other person will not be sharing or providing their service or product for free. There has to be a win-win otherwise people will take advantage of you. There are ways to create a win-win through volunteering or trading services. It is up to you what you want to share and help with. Remember your worth and value in the marketplace. Teach people how to treat you and when you’re in business you are there to serve but also to make money otherwise is just a hobby.

“The most important distinction anyone can ever make in their life is between who they are as an individual and their connection with others.”
― Anné Linden, Boundaries in Human Relationships: How to Be Separate and Connected

Boundaries to consider:

Is sharing your knowledge creating a win-win situation?
Are you in business to make money or is it a hobby?
Have you set clear expectations between friendship and business?

Learn to say no. You need to set clear expectations about what you are willing and able to do in your business versus what you can do. Just because you have a skill set that doesn’t mean you should be doing it all. Delegation is a key strength to increasing productivity and boosting performance in business. Not only are you saying no to things that you need to stop doing, you are also saying no to activities and tasks that do not utilize your strengths. Focusing on your strengths improve your business.

“if you want to live an authentic, meaningful life, you need to master the art of disappointing and upsetting others, hurting feelings, and living with the reality that some people just won’t like you. It may not be easy, but it’s essential if you want your life to reflect your deepest desires, values, and needs.”
― Cheryl Richardson, The Art of Extreme Self-Care: Transform Your Life One Month at a Time

Boundaries to consider:

Is there anything in your business you need to stop doing or delegate?
Are there any clients that are not the right fit for your business that you need to let go of?
What activities and have are you willing and able to do to best serve your customers or clients?

Setting boundaries not only teaches people how to treat you. Boundaries help you establish guidelines for yourself for what you are willing to do and what you’re not willing to do. Therefore you’re not compromising your core values. The clearer you are on who you are and what your company represents, the more respect you earn.

Although this seems a bit stringent, you will find that more people will actually be attracted to your business and find it more appealing because you offer structure, you have rules in which everyone will be treated the same, you abide by core values, and you are professional and respectful in your approach.

15 Time Saving Tips to Avoid Morning Madness

May 27, 2016 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

Getting out the door in the morning can be a challenge. It seems like there is never enough time to get things done. Why do some people seem to have a handle on this while others struggle?

Many of the time saving tips seem so common. If they were so common, why isn’t everyone doing it? You could be setting yourself up for a focused work day. Time is a commodity; use it wisely.

“I get up every morning determined to both change the world and to have one hell of a good time. Sometimes, this makes planning the day difficult.” – E.B. White

The night before…

Ensure you have gas in your vehicle the night before. Having the yellow light indicator alerting you to an empty tank will detour your efforts to getting to where you need to on time because now you need to plan to stop and fill up.
Put a clock in your bathroom. By keeping an eye on the time, you will have a better idea how much time getting ready is taking you and how soon you need to get out the door.
Set a timer or create a playlist of upbeat songs and set a firm timeline that you need to leave the house by. You should have an idea about how long it will take you to get ready and get out the door to your destination. You may choose to set it 15 minutes in advance so you can leave the house earlier prepared for the unexpected.
Write out your to-do list. Organize your drive time and errands so you make the most effective use of your time for the next day.
Pack your lunch. You are more likely to take a lunch if you are already prepared. If you are running late, you will skip making a lunch and end up having to buy one. It may not seem like much one time but if you did this regularly it could become quite costly. Fill up your water bottle and put together snack size vegetable packs to keep with you in a small cooler or grab an apple or orange to have on standby when needed.
Check the weather for the next day. You can plan your travels and what you are going to wear. You may need to pack an umbrella or a jacket.
Lay out your clothes that you are going to wear. You avoid wasting time making a decision. Some people have a standard uniform they wear to avoid having too many choices in the morning.
Sleep in your workout clothes. You are already dressed to work out and are less likely to bow out of your workout because you are dressed.
Set your essentials such as car keys, your gym bag, shoes, wallet or purse, and your to-do list at the front door. You will spend less time looking for keys to your vehicle and be prepared for your day.
Buy a coffee maker with a timer. If you need your morning cup of java, put the water and the grind in the coffee maker so that it is brewing as you are getting ready.
Put together an easy “on the go” breakfast. Skipping breakfast is not healthy. Your body needs to break the fast and the metabolism working in the morning. Prepare breakfast burritos in advance so that you can heat and go on the run. You may prepare snack size bags of cereal, some berries, and yogurt for a quick breakfast. Smoothies are great for a healthy breakfast for those who are rush. You can place your fruit and yogurt in the blender and keep it in the fridge so it is ready to go.
Go to bed at the same time every night or earlier. Open your curtains to the sun’s natural light can wake you. Your body needs a certain amount of sleep tp feel rested and you will be less likely to hit the snooze button and fall back into a sleep cycle.

“Morning is an important time of day, because how you spend your morning can often tell you what kind of day you are going to have.” – Lemony Snicket, The Blank Book

The morning of…

Wake up early and do the 20/20/20. Spend 20 minutes in meditation, prayer, or journaling to clear your mind and set the tone for the day. Spend another 20 minutes reading a book or article in your industry to improve your skills, knowledge, and abilities. Exercise for 20 minutes to keep your body strong and prepare yourself mentally for the day.
Don’t start responding to emails. Let the morning be your time to set the stage for the day. Keep your devices off. Focus on your needs first. Most emails require a response from you.
Stay off social media and turn off the news. You can get distracted by posts and feel the need to respond. Before you know it, you may be drawn into a video or be compelled to watch the TV just a little longer.

Feeling rushed or being late can set a tone for the day. It impacts customers/clients, co-workers, businesses, and organizations- and YOU! Set yourself up for success!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her work has been published in Diversity Magazine and Fabulous at 50 magazine. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. www.debrakasowski.com