Debra Kasowski

Stop Letting Your Troubles Keep You Awake at Night

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Do you dread getting up in the morning and going to work? Are you having trouble sleeping? Are you tossing and turning trying to get to sleep but nothing seems to work? Are you having trouble concentrating on simple tasks? You have many thoughts running through your head – all going in different directions. Some thoughts may be about how you are going to make ends meet or meet payroll, some thoughts may be about an interaction you have had or that you have yet to have with someone, and some thoughts may be that you no longer have passion or meaning in the work that you do. There can be many different thoughts troubling you. Don’t let them steal your joy, your happiness, or your sleep. You do have the power to change “what-is” to what you want it to be.

Identify What is Troubling You. You need to assess where you are at. What is troubling you? Is it one specific thing? Has your work become repetitive and routine? Do you look around and wonder if anyone else is feeling the same? Maybe you are wondering why you do not enjoy what you are doing anymore or you long to start your own business or jump into your side business full-time. Whatever is it, you do not have to face it alone. If you feel you need to brainstorm ideas or create a strategy, you can hire a coach to help you build an exit strategy or a plan. If you feel how you are feeling is related to anxiety or depression, a counselor or psychologist is the best person to support you.

Reflect on What Brought You Joy that You Stopped Doing. Everyone has things that they have built into their lives that bring them joy outside of work and business that creates anticipation and harmony (which some refer to as balance). Family vacations, listening to music, going for the morning run or partaking in sunrise yoga, or entertaining or long leisurely lunch with friends tend to be put on the backburner when we get consumed with work and family obligations. It is important to bring the things made you come alive back into your life. When you are happy and fulfilled, you not only share that happiness with others, you give them permission to do the same.

Decide What You Really Want. What are you passionate about? What makes you come alive because you have the burning desire to pursue it? The clearer you are, the clearer the path is before you to reach your destination. If you want to be a full-time entrepreneur, what does that look like? How will you spend your days? What is your product or service? How will you expose your product or service to the marketplace? If you want to change careers, what are you changing to? Do you need to go back to school?

“If you have a strong purpose in life, you don’t have to be pushed. Your passion will drive you there.” – Roy T. Bennett

Set a Date for Your Transition or Exit. Write down a specific date in which you plan to resign from your current role. Start planning backward from that date. What do you need to do to prepare for the transition? Do you need to save up a certain amount of money? Do you need to put together a training manual so you do not leave your replacement high and dry without some knowledge or history of your role?

Brainstorm What Barriers, Obstacles, or Roadblocks May Show Up. It is important to have these challenges in your awareness but do not focus on them. Know that there are internal and external roadblocks that may appear and brainstorm ways you may tend to them should they arise. You will be mentally prepared. They do should up.

Design Your Plan and Work the Plan. Write out your plan and create small milestones along the way. Breakdown each part of your plan into smaller tangible pieces; otherwise, you may get overwhelmed by all the things you feel you need to do. The daily actions will start creating momentum and propel you forward.

Celebrate Your Success. When you achieve your goal or reach your milestone, it is important that you take some time to acknowledge how far you have come from where you were. You took matters into your own hands and made decisions for YOU. You do not want to live with regret wondering what would have happened if you only made the leap.

Inject what you love doing into your life. If it does not make you say, “Hell yes!” or “Absolutely”; it means, “Hell No!” or “Not a Chance!” Life is too short to not do what you love and leave your signature out in the world.

What goal have you set that will make you jump out of bed in the morning and go after it?

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

10 Things You Need to Stop Doing in Order to Start Seeing Results

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businessman showing Stop doing what doesn't work words underneath his shirt over blue sky

When people think about productivity and performance, they often think about how many items they accomplished and crossed off on their to-do lists. However, if your total focus is on what you should or could be doing, the list could be endless. It is easy to get caught up on the to do list but we fail to notice that if we spent more time stopping what we should not be doing we could increase our productivity, performance, and start seeing the results that we really want.

Start creating a Stop Doing List:

  1. Stop being distracted by your cellphone; put it away. When you take time to put your distractions away and actively listening to what the other person is saying and paying attention to their body language you will start to pick up clues can learn so much more about the other person. This will help you ask better questions and strengthen relationships. Putting away your distractions allows you to do the work you know you need to get done like finishing a report, making a phone call to a client, or sending out that welcome package.
  2. Stop talking about yourself and your role. Take time to find out more about your employees are your customers instead of focusing on yourself. You will learn more about their needs and their wants and how you can best serve them. People are not interested in you and what you role is and how great you are. They want to know what is in it for them – make the conversation about them.
  3. Stop making rash or impulsive decisions. Feeling frustrated or angry? Step away from the situation get some fresh air. Gather more information. Separate the facts from your emotions. Take some time to assess and weigh your options. Give yourself a specific amount of time before you make a decision, hold a difficult conversation, or invest your money. For example, some people wait 24 hours before making a major purchasing decision. This time frame allows for them to think through their decision before making it final.
  4. Stop blaming, complaining and making excuses. These behaviors are just the deflective mechanism for not taking full responsibility for one’s actions, behaviors, and life. You need to own what you do and what you say and take personal responsibility for what you can influence. When you avoid speaking up when you see a gap or something wrong in a plan, you must accept the consequences. If you want different results, you must speak up and provide information that may be necessary to get the results you need. Complaining does not solve anything; it allows you to vent. Action creates results. Excuses are just reasons why you’re not fully committed to what you said you wanted to do. Personal accountability starts with you committing to what you say you want to achieve and taking the actions necessary to make it happen.Portrait of a beautiful girl showing stop sign with palms isolated on a white background
  5. Stop making assumptions and judgments. When you make assumptions and judgments, you are making them based on your own personal beliefs and experiences. You are painting everyone with the same brush. A better approach would be to come from a learner’s perspective and ask questions to gain more information. Start challenging the assumptions and judgments and discover if they are really true. You may find that some of those perceptions are totally off-base.
  6. Stop making everything a competition where someone has to lose and someone has to win. You will gain greater strides when you start working with people than working against them. If someone is better at something than you are, ask questions and learn from them. Hone your own skills to be better. Leverage your strengths versus focusing on your weaknesses.
  7. Stop putting off what needs to get done. You need to ensure that you are managing your priorities. Focus on where your greatest return on investment of your time, money, and resources come from. Work on what you need to get done first before answering e-mails that often request things of you.
  8. Stop reacting and getting defensive to change. Change represents progress and movement. People often react and get defensive when they lack information and they make snap judgments. Get more information so that you can respond to a situation and communicate your needs and get what you want.
  9. Stop putting in the last word. Everyone does not need your two cents about how great you are and how you are the only one who makes great decisions or is successful. You may be great but you don’t want your last words to linger making others feel poorly about themselves. When a conversation is closed, leave it at its highest point instead of ending with, “By the way…”
  10. Stop making decisions that are not aligned with your values and what you say is important to you. Your life and where you are, are a product of all the decisions and choices you have made thus far. If you want different results, you need to start making different choices. Take time to figure out what is most important to you and ask yourself why you decide to do what you do. When you know your “why”, you will make better choices.

BONUS: Stop worrying about what other people think. Do you want to become what they think of you or what you think of yourself? Seeking other people’s approval is exhausting of your time and energy. Be yourself!

What you do on your to do list is just as important as what you need to stop doing. When you focus on what you need to stop doing, you will realize that you will tend to your priorities and start seeing your productivity, performance, and even profits start to grow. You are in control of your results.

What things can you add to the list?

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. She is a contributing writer for Diversity Magazine and Fabulous at 50 magazine. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. www.debrakasowski.com