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EPISODE 24 – Know Your Worth

September 6, 2016 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

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Episode 24 – Know Your Worth

“I’ve learned that fear limits you and your vision. It serves as blinders to what may be just a few steps down the road for you. The journey is valuable, but believing in your talents, your abilities, and your self-worth can empower you to walk down an even brighter path. Transforming fear into freedom – how great is that?” Soledad O’Brien

48130021 - annoyed upset angry woman plugging her ears with fingers doesn't want to listen — 48130021 – annoyed upset angry woman plugging her ears with fingers doesn’t want to listen

There are way too many people walking around in the world who do not know their worth. They have been hanging on to the message that says “I am not enough.” They may have heard it from their parents, peers, bosses, teachers, or colleagues that they weren’t measuring up but they didn’t have what it took to reach the next level. They may have even been told that their dreams were too big and that they shouldn’t stretch that far. When you listen to those messages or replay them in their mind over and over, you start to believe it the message. You become the story that you tell yourself. You integrate it into who you are. You become afraid to stretch out of your comfort zone and really step into the person that you’re meant to be.

I believe that one time or another we have all had instances where we felt that someone has put us in our place. Sometimes it doesn’t matter how much experience you have in a certain area, knowledge or expertise, there may be someone who doesn’t see what you bring to the table. I’ve had an experience like this personally. When I learned that the person did not see my value, I looked inside myself to see how I may be reflecting that and in a conversation with this person I shared my value because I believe in my capabilities and I also know that I can step into any situation learn and grow as long as I’ve learned to work with my people. Processes can be learned and taught in relationships with people have to be built and nurtured over time. We teach people how to treat us and this is why it was so important for me to express myself when I saw someone didn’t see the worth I saw it myself. Don’t let others define your worth. Ask for feedback on how you need to show up and put the effort in. At the end of the day, I am glad that circumstance didn’t turn out the way I originally hoped because other opportunities were standing bright in my future. Sometimes you have to say no to good in order to experience great.

Recognize Your Strengths

You need to take the time to recognize what your strengths are to help understand your worth. It is about knowing your value and what you bring forth to the world and your leadership style. Do not dwell on your weaknesses, focus on your strengths. It doesn’t matter whether you’re leading your household, community group, an organization, or running a business. If you don’t understand what you bring that increases the value you will not make an impact. What do you do that adds to your competitive advantage? What you offer that others do not? What makes you stand out from the crowd?

If you’re struggling to come up with your strengths, you may want to ask others around you to discover which are known for- your signature. What is it when a project or situation comes up the first person they think of is you?

Create Goals That Challenge You

When you create goals that challenge and stretch you, you realize that you are more than good enough. You are capable of so much more than you often give yourself credit for. When you are fearful or intimidated from trying new things or taking on challenges you are less likely to take any action. Yes, there will be a learning curve. Yes, it will be a challenge. These challenges are meant to help you learn and grow and become stronger and more resilient. The best way to face the challenge is to increase your efforts. The more inspired your action the greater results you will achieve. Those who are most resilient are people who see their current situation or setback as temporary and not a permanent state. They know that if they take action that their circumstance can change. If they do nothing, nothing changes.

Value Your Work

Lou Tice stated,” No matter what you say you want to achieve or become – you aren’t going to do it unless you first believe you deserve it and can cause it to happen.” You need to believe that you deliver value and you deserve a positive outcome whether the monetary or in the form of relationship building. It doesn’t matter if you are putting together a proposal, asking for a raise, or deciding to charge what you’re worth for your product or service, you need to believe you are worth it and know your value. Arm yourself with facts. Keep track of your achievements and contributions and their impact no matter how big or small. Not only are these good for negotiating, they are also important for you to review when you may have a bad day. They act as reminders to let you know how far you’ve come.

You are not the same person from one year ago, three years ago, or five years ago. You have evolved into the person you are now and with that come knowledge, talents, skills, and abilities along with much experience. There is no one like you. Don’t sell yourself short. Demonstrate how you have exceeded expectations and why you are deserving of what you wish to achieve. When you believe it and speak with conviction, others will believe it too. Step into your power.

I would love to hear about how knowing your worth – knowing your value has changed the way you show up in life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Give us a 5-star rating! Sign up for our Newsletter www.debrakasowski.com

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Time: 10:49 min

Keywords: Self-esteem, self-worth, self-efficacy, believe in yourself, asking for a raise, making a proposal, set goals, goal setting, challenge yourself, resilience, resiliency, leadership, leader, define your worth, not good enough, achieve, achievement

EPISODE 22: Focus on What You Want

August 30, 2016 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

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Episode 22: Focus on What You Want

“If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.”
― Roy Bennett

There are so many things going on in our daily lives that we’re distracted from being focused and being in the present moment. Look around you there are some people who are super focused; they know exactly what they want and are driven to succeed. Then there are others who don’t know what they want to appear to be stumbling through life. Which person are you?

Do not be dismayed if you find yourself being the person with lack of focus. By listening to this podcast you’ll find ways to zoom in on your focus.

Knowing what you want gives you clarity. Everything around you becomes clearer. You know what goals you want and decision-making becomes easy. When you’re unclear, it kind of feels like walking around in the dark where you don’t know exactly where you’re going and can stub your toe. You can get clear by just sitting down and writing out what it is you want. Don’t judge or critique your and writing. Don’t worry about spelling or grammar. Keep writing!

Catch your thoughts and shift. In Episode 13 The Power Of Positive Thinking we talked about how we have 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts in a day and that 80% of those thoughts were negative. When you realize you are having negative thoughts and you are self-aware of them, you have the ability to change thought. You can shift gears or flip the light switch in your thought process. As you notice the negative thoughts, you can either accept it or you can reject it. Reframe the thoughts into something more positive. It really comes down to focusing on what you want and not what you don’t want

What do you think happens when you focus on what you don’t want? Worries, fears, anxiety, self-doubt, and your internal critic pops its head and that’s all we see. As you focus on what you don’t want, your action star reflecting your thoughts and you self-sabotage yourself from getting what you really want. There is so much power in the way you think. I cannot stress enough how much you need to be paying attention to how your thinking. It impacts everything you do. You end up joining the ancient awful club and feel awful. Your mind thinks that’s what you want. Worrying just attracts problems and notice you don’t worry about what outcomes you want. You only end up worrying about what you lack which ends up bringing you more lack.

When you experience resistance, there is often a misalignment with your values and who you want to be. This internal conflict is alerting you to the fact that you’re focusing on the wrong things. You need to start focusing on what you can control versus what you cannot.

Energy flows where your attention goes. What are you paying attention to? The reticular activating system (RAS) is our brain’s attention center. It is the place where our thoughts and feelings interact with their outside world and how we interpret it. If you focus on your past and see your past with regret, your actions will not move you forward toward renewed future.

Esther Hicks said, “A belief is a thought you keep thinking and things actualize around it to confirm that thought.” When you put a spotlight on something, you will find evidence and rationale to make that thought your truth. It becomes your reality. focus perspective However, if you change your focus by looking at other perspectives and choose a reality that you truly want, you will find evidence and rationale that supports that truth. Whatever you believe becomes your reality. You need to lock into the thoughts that you want and get really focused on where you want to go with your thoughts and the actions you will be taking.

You may be telling yourself right now that I don’t like my reality. Your reality may be your present or remember no moment is permanent. You can either accept your reality as it is or choose different thoughts to feel differently and you will start taking actions to match your new belief. You need to believe in your reality and that you can always improve. No matter if it is a positive or negative moment is temporary. Whatever you believe your reality to be will be the story that you share and tell yourself.

The trouble is and that people get caught up in comparing themselves to others through social media and real life. For professionals, many individuals saw social media as a form of showcasing their skills, talents, and abilities and making them stand out from the crowd. Some individuals have used social media to compare their lives to the lives of others. Have you noticed that people post all the great things about what’s going on in their lives? You are comparing yourself to a moment in time and not their whole life timeline. You may see exotic travels, celebrations with friends, and other things that you may long for. This comparison can make people feel depressed if they choose to and they will not take actions that support what they want. When you compare yourself to others you are focusing on another person’s reality and what they believe to be true.

I want to ask you some questions to help you get clear and focus on what you want.

What action will give you your greatest return on investment of your time money and other resources? These are the needle-movers or the game-changers. Are you taking the right actions?

What are the things that are distracting you?

What thoughts are you having? Are you experiencing worry fear and self-doubt? It just means that you’re focusing on what you don’t want. Shift the thought and change your actions.

Here are some things to help you get laser focused and get what you want:

Get super clear on what it is that you want. Write it down.

Accept what is and create the reality that you wish to see. Don’t worry about what everyone else’s thinking or doing. Their opinion applies to them and not to you. People’s advice comes from their own experiences and fears. Choose what you want to accept and what you choose to reject as truth.

Visualize the results that you want.

Prioritize tasks and things you need to get done.

Prepare for what you want and need by gathering resources, accumulating knowledge, and developing your skills and abilities.

Eliminate your distractions and interruptions. Don’t check your e-mail in the morning until you have done some focused work. No e-mail or texting and tell the task is done.

Remove any clutter on your desk or in your space. You may develop the urge to start cleaning it or start working on another project.

Learn to say “no”. You cannot be all things to all people and accomplish what you want to get done for yourself. By focusing on pleasing others, you may lose focus on who you are and what you wanted to accomplish. I’m not saying you shouldn’t help people. There is a difference between helping others and living a life doing what others want for you. By living a life of pleasing others you please no one because other people have different expectations than what you do.

“Focusing is about saying No.”
― Steve Jobs

Take a break every hour for about 5 to 10 min. In order for your focus to be sustainable, you must take a break to recharge and rejuvenate. Your mind does need some time to wander and generate new ideas. You often get a fresh perspective when you come back and look at what you’re focused on.

Take actions that support what you are working toward achieving. You will notice that you will be more productive and efficient with your time, talent and efforts.

Change your focus to what you want and not on what you don’t want – for it will become your reality.

Don’t forget to grab your free DOWNLOAD to help you

get focused on what you want.

I would love to hear about how focusing on what you want has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Give us a 5-star rating! Sign up for our Newsletter www.debrakasowski.com

Time 12:15 mins

EPISODE 18: Secrets to Success and Health

August 16, 2016 by Debra Kasowski

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Episode 18 – Secrets to Success and Health

“If we are creating ourselves all the time, then it is never too late to begin creating the bodies we want instead of the ones we mistakenly assume we are stuck with.”
― Deepak Chopra

Research shows that there is a direct correlation between our health and our success. When I talk about health I am talking about the physical, psychological, that emotional piece and financial health. As many of you may or may not know, I have a degree in nursing and health has played a very important aspect in my life. I have been there when a baby has taken their first breath and I’ve held the hand of someone who is taken their last. I want to impress upon you the importance of how your health impacts your success. Take a moment to think about the people you would identify a successful. What type of person are they? What do they have that makes you believe that there successful? Do they look after their health? I am focused on the physical, psychological, and financial health.

Physical Health

I can talk about this topic for days but I’ll make sure that we streamline and for the purposes of this podcast. It has been demonstrated that people who were physically fit tend to eat better, have better habits, and they missed fewer days of work because they’ve developed a high resistance to illness because their immunity is strong. Physical fitness provides many benefits and it is more than looking good in the mirror. I once read an article about how our brain functions during exercise and as soon as we’re done exercising the blood flow shift to the front of the brain where we are better able to focus and concentrate. So if you have something that requires your focus and attention you may want to go for a brisk walk before or run or some form of physical activity before you jump in to your work. People who are active fit tend to be more accepting and tolerant of themselves and others. They are productive and better problem solvers. They retain information better than those who are not active. They expressed having low levels of stress and fatigue.

When I talk about being physically active, it’s about choosing to do activities that you enjoy. They may be done individually or as part of a team. It is recommended that everyone participates in some form of physical activity per 30 to 60 min. a day. I encourage many of the clients that I work with to keep their running shoes in their car so that they could fit in a brisk walk in between clients. It is important to take care of yourself so that you can serve others with your mission and your message. Without your health, you will be unable to achieve the level of success that you desire. If you require accountability, enroll a friend to get active with you or hire a personal trainer. Learn what it takes to be in your top shape. Don’t let your health slip with long hours and poor eating habits. Skipping exercising and grabbing a doughnut will not serve you.

I grew up on a farm and I used to carry 5-gallon pails to help my parents with the chores. I develop a strong upper body. My swim instructors used to tell me that I had a very strong upper body they need to do to work on my legs. When I was first introduced to working out or going to a gym, I was an able to do 10 pounds on a weight machine. I started small. I started with using my own body weight and built up to it. I can proudly say that I can do close to 70-75 pounds. I now enjoy kettlebells, TRX, and competing in triathlons. You can to and one of the easiest forms may be by just going for a walk.

Build exercise as a habit into your day and if possible do it in the morning so that you get it out of the way and you don’t find reasons not to do it. Develop the self-discipline to go after your fitness health as much as you do in other areas because how you do something is how you end up doing everything.

Sleep and Hydration

Ensure that you are hydrated and that you are getting enough sleep. I used to have a phrase that I used to say, “I will sleep when I’m dead”. If you overwork yourself and don’t take care of yourself that day may come sooner than you think. Plan to get at least 6 to 8 hours of sleep per night if possible. Develop a routine before you go to bed. Turn off the TV and electronics at least 30 min. before going to sleep so that you can calm down your mind. You will have a sharper mind and think much clearer about the decisions that you have to make on a regular basis.

Financial Health

One of the greatest sources of stress in society today and in marital relationships is financial health and usually, the lack of. When your finances are in order, everything around you seems more manageable. When your finances are out of order, there is an increase in stress, tension, and relationships, increase in illness such as heart disease and high blood pressure, and you may be short-tempered. There is a greater risk for misunderstandings and saying things that you don’t mean.

Learn how to manage her money and set a budget. Knowing the amount of money you have coming in and going out makes a big difference. You will be better able to make decisions about your finances and what you can and cannot do. Save for what you want. Instant gratification is not always the answer. There are many people who have clothes in their closet that still have a price tag on and have never been worn. Balance your cheque book and check your numbers daily if you can otherwise weekly and monthly. Assess what is working, what is not working, and what you can do to improve. You will start noticing the little things that you can be doing to make a big difference. It could be that you skip the latte or take a lunch with you in the car. De-clutter your home and sell things that are no longer of use to you. You will start to notice that as you relieve this weight on your shoulders that you will have the opportunity to think more clearly and see the possibilities around you.

We all face challenges in life some of these challenges are more demanding than others. It all depends on how we choose to either respond or react to the situation that affects their outcomes. In the past, research has shown that success is what makes people happy, but in recent studies according to the American Psychological Association, it is happy people who set goals, find the resources, and surround themselves with happy people who achieve success.

Success is a Mindset

Success is truly a mindset. It is who you are and what you choose to become. Commit to

lifelong learning. Learn new skills and develop your abilities. Learn to be mindful and be present in the moment. Be grateful for everything that you have and soon enough you will have more to be grateful for. When it comes to psychological and emotional strain, it often comes from misunderstandings and mindset. People will come from a place of judgment or who have fixed mindset are not open to learning perspectives of other people and their way is the only way. They are in a constant debate trying to defend their viewpoint. They react to situations versus response causing great tension. I encourage you to develop a learner mindset one in which is open to learning different perspectives, flexible and adaptable to new situations and sees feedback as an opportunity to learn and grow. By choosing to be a lifelong learner about the world around you, you will have less stress and be able to live more in the moment. Leave the past behind you for you cannot change the events. Learn to forgive yourself and others. For people who know better, do better and if they have learned from it let it go.

Start disciplining yourself and focusing on what it is you want to achieve. Make a commitment to yourself today that you will start looking after your health to ensure your success – a success that you will be around to enjoy.

“I promise you nothing is as chaotic as it seems. Nothing is worth diminishing your health. Nothing is worth poisoning yourself into stress, anxiety, and fear.”
― Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience

Time: 13:35 min

EPISODE 17: Harness the Power of Momentum

August 11, 2016 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

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Episode 17 – Harness the Power of Momentum

There are no limits to what you can achieve if you stay focused on what you are trying to achieve. You need to believe the impossible is possible for you. Your results may be better than you expect. Success has no guarantees; each action you take starts creating a momentum. If you stop taking action, you stop the momentum.

“Always work hard. Intensity clarifies. It creates not only momentum, but also the pressure you need to feel either friction, or fulfillment.”

— Marcus Buckingham

During my coaching program, we learned about Creative Tension – It moves us to take action. It helps us get out of our comfort zone and stretch us. Challenge us.

Why do we need it? What does it do?

Momentum helps us:

Push through and overcome obstacles. You may have heard about runners or even swimmer pushing through a certain distance to push forward what they may not have thought possible exclaiming, “What else can I do? What else can I do?” What else is possible for you?
Increase your motivation and confidence in your abilities. It helps you to try new things!

You are responsible for creating it through consistent actions. A rapid succession of successes and lessons drives momentum. Energy increases; it will be natural for others to want to follow you. You will become magnetic. You will start to inspire others around you.

Momentum is ignited when you have a clear vision – you know what you want to achieve, you are able to articulate and share your vision, and you can enroll others in your vision.

Do you want to get more clarity? Read my book GPS Your Best Life

Believe in your ability to make things happen. Your confidence, energy, and enthusiasm with excite others around you.

You are probably thinking to yourself – but how do I create a momentum – especially when times are tough or you are feeling challenged more than you think you can handle.

I want to share with you some of the ways that have worked for me and some of the clients I have worked with.

Challenge yourself – Be committed to continuous learning, stay curious and have a learner mindset. Try new things regularly.
Make a rule to quit complaining, blaming, and stop making excuses. You either get results or excuses.
Reduce your distractions. Declutter your space or your email. Clear whatever is in your way.
Be grateful for what you have; the more you will have to be grateful for.
Celebrate your successes – little things lead to big things! It will drive you to take more action. Breath in and acknowledge the successes before moving on to the next thing.
Deliver value and look for ways to exceed expectations. You will generate excitement in others and they will be grateful and share their experience with you – with others.
Do you least favorite activity first – EAT THAT FROG – Brain Tracy

Everything will move so much quicker with the momentum.

Set Milestones – You create anticipation. You may even meet goals quicker.
Measure your outcomes – what gets measured gets managed.
Fake it until you make it – take the actions you need to get to where you want to go. Who is a leader you admire? How can emulate some of the actions that they have taken to achieve success – do your homework. If you want to be a great leader, start being one now.
Make a plan – Work the plan. Otherwise, you will be chasing butterflies. Do you due diligence and your resources.
Don’t forget to dream – Sometimes when people are too realistic to the bone, it drags people down. Dreams can propel you further rather than looking at your current circumstances.
Follow up with people you have met at events or make inquiries – you will be surprised when you connect with others. They energy rises and people take an interest in what you are doing.

What happens when you stop running on a treadmill or riding a bike?

You stop moving – you fall off.

Worry and doubt can paralyze you from taking forward action. They drain your energy. Challenge yourself – test your theories. Ask questions. Gain knowledge – but don’t stop unless you know you are in danger.

No one is going to jail or getting hurt or killed in the process chances are whatever happens you can course correct.

We all start somewhere. There have been many successful people who did not start with any resources – no network of people, no money, no knowledge, did not know English or a language of the place they settled in. They built it and so can you.

“Always do your best. What you plant now, you will harvest later.” — Og Mandino

Success is not about how many resources you have; it is about being resourceful and leveraging your resources in the most effective way. Focus on taking action and over time a compound effect with occur. If you are focused only on short-term activities to get immediate results, you will lose momentum quickly especially if you do not set a new target that stretched you.

Your efforts make a difference in how you feel about your progress and what you are going to achieve.

Let your efforts multiply!

Success comes from taking the initiative and following up…persisting…eloquently expressing the depth of your love. What simple action could you take today to produce a new momentum toward success in your life?

— Tony Robbins

You need to continually set new challenges to learn and grow. Acknowledge how far you have come. Reflect on what you can do better and work to improve.

Time: 16:31 min

EPISODE 12: Epic Ways to Seize Your Happiness

July 26, 2016 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

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EPISODE 12 – EPIC WAYS TO SEIZE YOUR HAPPINESS

What does happiness have to do with leadership, business, and human potential? When you are in a happy state, you change the actions that you take. You change the way you approach things. You change your perception of different things, when you’re in a happy state of mind.

“For every minute you are angry you lose 60 seconds of happiness.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

I really don’t want you to lose out; I want you to become the leader that you were meant to be. Lead a fulfilling life and work business and at home. We are going to talk about the ways to seize your happiness so you might want to grab a paper and pen and if you are you driving in the car listening to this podcast you can go to the show notes and download your epic ways that you can seize your happiness.

Train Your Brain. Start with training your brain. Happiness is truly a state of mind. To be able to practice mindfulness and to be in a place where you are able to recognize smallest of things that contribute to the world today. When we talk about mindfulness, it’s not just about sitting in meditation and clearing your mind you so you have this blank slate. By being mindful, it is being able to recognize the small things: the breath that you take, the smell of a flower, to interpret someone’s emotions way when you’re having a conversation with them – being able to be perceptive of what’s going on around you.Some of the ways to practice mindfulness are meditation. There is prayer – by being able to feel like you’re connected with the universe or God or whatever that being is for you – something greater. Some people practice mindfulness through yoga, through just doing some deep breathing exercises, and recognizing how their body feels and being able to recognize these things around you – how you interact with your environment.

Getting Enough Sleep. Many people are running on so little sleep. I use to say this phrase that “I would sleep when I’m dead.” However, when you really think about it if you wear yourself out by working 60 to 80 hours a week how long will that be sustainable? Are you truly showing up in giving your best self?What happens is when you are exhausted, your fuel tank decreases. You’re not able to fully give the full horsepower of what your engine of who you are is able to give. When you get enough sleep, you actually less triggered by the events around you so when something does not go right you are able to be more responsive than reactive. Our bodies do need to rest to allow our minds and cells in our body to actually repair from the work of the day. By allowing yourself at least 7 to 8 hours of sleep, you’re giving yourself a way of clearing any mental fog that “brain fog” so you can think clearly and make decisions well while being able to assess information and facts before you.

Practice Gratitude. People take for granted that we have all the things that came into our lives. Take a look around you everything you have in your life change your life by choice. By saying by choice, the more you are grateful for something, the more that happens to show up in your life, more things for you to be grateful for.There is a book that I read too long ago called, 365 Thank Yous: The Year a Simple Act of Daily Gratitude Changed My Life by John Kralik.He changed his life. This book is about this individual is kind of a grumpier kind guy stressed out and he decided that he needed to change his life. What he did every day for 365 days of the year, is that he sent out the hand written a letter of acknowledgment to different people who are impacted or his life in some way. His whole life shifted. Part of it was his attitude and how he viewed things. Now he started to recognize the things he was grateful.
I recommend to clients that I work with that when you stop and recognize some of the things that you are grateful for, you start to notice more things. The list gets longer but I do recommend you at least acknowledge three things that you are grateful for each day. Make as simple as a smile, someone held the door open for you, or you just recognizing that someone complimented you today. We often move onto the next thing and failed to recognize, some of the small things that really have enhanced our lives. This goes back to being mindful but being able to recognize how all the small things really contribute to the bigger picture – the person who you become and who you have yet to be.

Focus on People NOT Stuff. Focus on building and nurturing relationships and not on material goods and things. When you focus on the relationships, you add a whole new richness to your life. You learn about people. You learn what motivates them. Zig Ziglar had a saying that if you help enough people get what they want, you will get what you want. You will accomplish your goals as you help them.Don’t focus on the stuff. Stuff can be purchased. Relationships are not something to be purchased. They are something to live, to enjoy and to share.

Set Meaningful Goals. Many people out there don’t set goals. Only the top to 3% of people, set goals on a regular basis. When you set goals for yourself, you want to use the SMART goal method which is: S – Specific, M- Measurable, A- Achievable, R- Realistic, and T for Timely. When you use this, what you trying to do is be specific, what is it that you want to achieve, what you want to achieve and by when the timestamp because without that it becomes a wish; it becomes a dream. It something that you’re not actually working toward so we will be able to measure it; give it a timestamp as to when you might want to do this by. It’s commitment. The next one is achievable. Is this achievable within the time frame that you are trying to do this? Is this something you can actually do? Is this realistic? Is it something you can do within the time frame you provided for yourself?R is for realistic. People say why not lose weight in 24 hours. As you can see that’s not very realistic unless you’ve undergone some type of surgery. It’s about thinking about if it is realistic in the time frame. Maybe you need to adjust your time frame or test it out and then re-adjust- it happens. Timely, we want to be able to measure it. We want to go back to the time date stamp as to when you’re going to achieve it. Some people set goals that you cannot actually measure it’s not something they can measure per se.What I like to recommend is using a rating scale of 0 to 10, 0 (lowest point) is about how you’re feeling about a subject and 10 is that you are at the top of your game. Let’s say you are at a 5/10, and then you decide what actions you are going to take to go from a 5 to a 7/10 two weeks from now. Thinking about those strategies and what you need to have in place and who you need to connect with. These are how we say to breakdown and chunk down your goals. You have to really stop and think about all the things that can help you get to where you want to go. Work backward, so if you know where you’re going in the time frame, what are the steps you need to take? Break it down into smaller pieces thinking about the resources, how much time you need to a lot to it, and how much money might need to go into it. What are the resources? What is your grit power? What is the work that you need to put in to get this done? Maybe you are going to achieve it earlier and need to set a new goal to up your game or you might need to adjust some of the strategies.
Think about the strategies. Who else do you need to get involved in helping you get to where you want to go? What happens, when set meaningful goals, is that all of a sudden you create this excitement; you create energy around you because you have something that gives you momentum something you look forward to achieving. I was sharing with people in my newsletter that I had a friend who challenged a few people to set a swim goal and I had set it for 4000 m 10 weeks down the road. I figured 400 m per week was reasonable because I like to participate in other activities. I thought I usually the average about 300-400 meters then I am out of the pool. I became so excited so focused on how my rhythm was or how my stroke was that I achieve that goal within four weeks and then my son said to me, “You know what Mom, I don’t think you’re working hard enough” my mouth just dropped.” I replied, “Okay, you’re not the one who’s swimming so I decided that I would up the game. I had six more weeks to go so I thought I can swim 6000 m more. I finished again a little bit early because of the excitement of it and I pushed myself to do something that I haven’t done in over 11 years is1500 m in one stretch to conquer the 10,000. It felt phenomenal to be able to achieve something that I haven’t done a long time but to set that goal. When you do this, you are really able to create a momentum in your life and it increases your happiness because you know that you’re reaching these the small milestones along the way.

Spend time with family and friends. Surrounding yourself with people who support you. Spending time with people- family and friends sharing in celebrations, birthdays, and holidays really connecting with people and accepting people unconditionally for who they are. One thing I want you to keep in mind, as a leader is no matter of what you are working with her when you are speaking with, remember that they’re all part of their own journey. Everybody isn’t doing the same as you or in the same place as you. They might want to learn from you or be mentored by you. People may say, “Why would someone want to learn from me?” Everyone has someone that they look up to. Think of the kids in school fourth-grader looking up at the sixth-grader thinking that there like a God because they have gone through some of the milestones and journeys and just excited to be a part of it. Spend time connecting with people and getting to know about people. What makes the tick? What gets them excited? What are their hopes and dreams? When you really take time to get to know somebody’s dream that’s when you are ultimately connecting with people

Forgive Others. When we talk about forgiveness, I want to keep in mind that forgiveness is the process. It is not that you’re going to forget what happened to you. By being able to forgive, you build stronger relationships, you’re able to express how you feel, and put you in a greater place and state of mind. Psychologists talk about forgiveness as being a conscious deliberate decision to release those feelings of resentment. There may be anger or frustration.A person I met and the totally adore is Dr. Shawne Duperon. She is a six-time Emmy award-winner. She was nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize for her work with Project Forgive and she uses this in leadership to help teach leaders the importance of forgiveness. The documentary coming out in January 2017 or later in 2017 I believe that is the date it is rolling out. She has researched good gossip is part of her Ph.D. She is an ultimate communicator and public speaker.Her message is on how important forgiveness is. You can learn more about this project by going her website www.projectforgive.com to learn about how you can help support this project because of what it’s doing. The documentary was triggered by a hearing about an accident that happened to killed part of a family. She knew the family that was affected but she also knew the person who caused the accident. What happened is that these people were able to forgive each other and it had sparked is like a domino effect of sharing these stories of how people work to get passed it, and move forward from some of the most painful places in their lives. To be able to forgive – to be able to move forward. They’re not going to forget what happened but they’re going to release feelings that are holding them back from moving forward with enjoying their lives and being happy. It is truly a phenomenal gift. If you get a chance go to www.projectforgive.com, check it out and learn more about this very powerful movement.
When forgiving others, you may not forget but remember that other people make mistakes too. We get angry; it’s like we’re expecting people to be perfect, forgetting that there are mistakes that others make.

Do Things for Other People. You feel greater happiness than you are able to do things for other people; sometimes the best thing to do when you’re wallowing in your stuff and you feel like things are not going the way you want them to is get out of your own space. Go out and volunteer. Go out to places and help people achieve things that they need, whether it’s a women’s shelter or to child center that needs your support, or going to the Humane Society – for those animal lovers listening to the podcast. Get out your own space and do some good in the world instead of keeping that focus on yourself. When you are focusing on yourself, you’re sitting in a space that doesn’t allow you to move out of that space. You keep looking at the problem versus a solution. When you take actions to get out of that space, you are able to clear your head and really see some of the happiness in your day.

Finally, my favorite because it is free to give a smile. Not a fake smile – people. I want your smile to go up to your eyes so your eyes twinkle. You can tell a true smile by how someone’s eyes I look.

There are no shortcuts to happiness. Happiness does not come to you; I want you to remember, it comes from you. You need to take action steps to help you become happier.

“Count your age by your friends, not years.

Count your life by smiles, not tears.”

John Lennon

Pretty Powerful! There are other resources a course on seizing your happiness. There is so much good going on. Make your life great! Make your leadership message your legacy helping people grow. Be a people builder.

Another resource you can tap into is the TED Talk by Shawn Achor with The Happiness Advantage.

There are books on living happy, working happy, really find what you love to do. The ultimate fulfillment is being able to challenge yourself to reach new heights, to become better than yesterday. These are the things that are and help you seize your happiness and grab on to what you truly want. Remember that being happy is contagious! The reason why I want to talk about happiness in this podcast is because when you are happy you performed better and you will also be more productive. You will achieve great results by allowing your happiness to come through you and into the work that you do. The creativity and innovation are going to spark so many more ideas and things that can be game changers for you and others.

What are you going to do to increase your happiness today?

Email me at Debra@debrakasowski.com and let us know what you would like to be featured on the show. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Give us a 5-star rating! Sign up for our Newsletter www.debrakasowski.com

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