Debra Kasowski

When Your Plan to ‘Have it All’ Backfires: How to Balance Your Commitments

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The quest for work-life balance and ‘having it all’ can be a disillusion for many as they work long hours trying to give equal attention to each area of their lives. Not only is this disappointing, it leaves people literally exhausted and feeling over-extended. People are shuttling children to and from activities, cleaning house, buying groceries, making meals, writing reports and blog posts while making meals, and balancing the budget. They have become so task-oriented that they are no longer pursuing and living a life of significance and meaning. What was once a mission to achieve meaningful goals and leave a legacy has now left individuals disinterested and forgetting why they were on their mission altogether.

When everything around you seems to be falling apart, it is time to step back and take a look at what is going on around you and re-evaluate. There are no easy solutions or one-size fits all solutions. You are a work in progress and what works for you may not work for others. You can adjust your plan as you go. What’s most important is that you honour who you are and what you want in your life. Remember balancing your commitments does not mean that you need to give equal attention to everything. Most of the time is comes down to dedicating some quality time versus worrying about the quantity of time you have.

Decide what ‘having it all’ means to you. What do you want to be, do, and have in your life? What are you willing to sacrifice or put aside for the time being as you focus on a different priority?

Know what your “WHY” is. What motivates you to go after your dreams and goals? What is behind your actions? What are you hoping to achieve?

“If you know the why, you can live any how.

― Friedrich Nietzsche

Make tough decisions around your priorities. Even though you do not want to out on a social engagement, you know family movie night is important to you. Sometimes you must miss out on good to achieve the great things that you want in your life. When you are clear on what is important to you; it is easy to make the right decision for you. Make a list of your top 5 priorities. They say you can tell a person’s priorities by what they worry about. What do you worry about? What do you focus on most? Tough decisions are easy when you know your priorities – everything seems to fall into place.
Learn to stand up and speak up for what you want and need. People are not mind-readers; they do not know what you want and need. You need to get in the habit of asking – asking questions to gain more information or asking for help. The most successful people in this world did not do it alone. They have had help along the way.

Delegate where possible. You may say, “But no one does it as good as me!” Although this may be true, are you using your time most effectively? Can you block off smaller increments of time over the week to do household chores instead of spending your whole Saturday cleaning the house and running errands? Can you hire someone to clean house or order your groceries online and then pick them up or have them delivered? Can you ask the kids to help with things that you usually do? Remember you are teaching them great life skills!

“If you want to do a few small things right, do them yourself. If you want to do great things and make a big impact, learn to delegate.”
― John C. Maxwell

You want to be focusing where your strengths lie. If it takes you two hours to hem one pair of pants, wouldn’t it be easier to get a tailor to do the job? No matter what you are doing, you are making these choices based on time, money, resources, and your beliefs about “how things should be.” Is it really how things should be? What if you came up with a “new normal” of the way you believe things should be? Would you be happier or more satisfied?

Make self-care a priority. Eat healthy meals and get regular exercise. The body you have is the only one you got so look after it. Your body does amazing things and gives you the support needed to function but it needs its rest too. Sleep does wonders for us. When you get enough sleep, you deal with life stressors much easier than if you were exhausted. You think more clearly and are not apt to jump to conclusions as easy.

Tap into your support system. When you get caught up in the hustle and bustle of work, life, and family, it can be easy to take what is important to you for granted. Communication is key. Share your goals and dreams with those most important to you. Let them know how important they are to you. Make time to support them with their goals too. They will be more apt to help you as well.

Choose to have an attitude of gratitude. The whirlwind of daily activities and financial strain can leave people feeling helpless and that their world has gotten out of control. They become resentful when things get in between what they want and what is currently happening. Remember that everything around you is based on choices you have made. What can you be grateful for?
There are some external forces influencing some of the outcomes but overall you are responsible for the results you have received. Instead of being resentful, be grateful and trust that you are exactly where you need to be now. Look for the lesson. Do you need to evaluate spending habits? Do you need to get rid of clutter? Do you need to ask for or give forgiveness? Maybe the flat tire you had kept you at home to avoid a major accident on the highway. The missed opportunity made room for a new opportunity that you otherwise would not have been available for.

Set clear boundaries of what you can take on and what you will not take on. There are people in our lives who can make their emergencies ours if we let them. You have one life to live – make sure you are doing what you want and need to do for yourself. Help people along the way but don’t just drop everything for fear of people getting upset with you or you feel obligated to. Choose a time that works best for you and does not take you away from your own priorities. Priorities change depending on the given situation; you core values of what you believe in do not.
Live with intention. Make a plan but be okay with adjusting as you need to. Be kind to yourself. Block off dedicated time to work on what you need to get done. Block off free time in your calendar for self-care and separate time for family or date nights.
You can have it all. You first need to define what “having it all means”. Be clear on your priorities and make your decisions based on your priorities. You will not be disappointed. Make plans and take intentional actions to achieve what you want and need. You can have it. And if it backfires, take a step back and re-evaluate again! Stay committed to what you want and need to make an impact and live a life of significance!
DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

5 ‘TED Talks’ Every Entrepreneur Must Watch

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The most successful business owners and entrepreneurs know it is important to commit to lifelong learning to be successful. One of the most accessible curated variety of resources lies in TED Talks. TED Talks are a nonprofit devoted to spreading ideas and they cover a wide range of topics in business, technology, educations and so much more. I was fortunate to attend one a few years ago and was inspired by many of the speakers’ journeys and messages. I hope one day I too will share an idea worth spreading in a TED Talk.

Entrepreneurs think much differently than the average person. They are willing to take risks and can size up a situation quickly. They are open to learning and trying out new ideas. They know that they must shift their mindset at a moments notice when faced with rejection. There are TED Talk ideas that speak directly to the heart of the entrepreneur that every entrepreneur needs to watch.

SIMON SINEK: START WITH WHY

Powerful Quote:
“Very few people or companies can clearly articulate WHY they do WHAT they do. By WHY I mean your purpose, cause or belief – WHY does your company exist? WHY do you get out of bed every morning? And WHY should anyone care?

People don’t buy WHAT you do, they buy WHY you do it.” – Simon Sinek, Start with Why

Lesson: Discover Your Why for Doing What You Do

GARY VAYNERCHUK: Building a Personal Brand Within the Social Media Landscape

Powerful Quotes:

“Legacy is greater than currency.” – Gary Vaynerchuk

“We only get to play this game once. ONE LIFE.” – Gary Vaynerchuk

Lesson: Believe in what you do. Quit doing things you are not passionate about.

SETH GODIN: How to get your ideas spread

Powerful Quote:

“The thing that going to decide what gets talked about, what gets done, what gets purchased, what gets built is, “Is it remarkable?”…worth making a remark about.” – Seth Godin

Lesson: Decide if what you are doing and offering is worthing remarking on. Word of mouth is the most powerful form of marketing.

MEL ROBBINS: How to Stop Screwing Yourself Over

 

Powerful Quote:

“It’s simple to get what you want BUT it’s not easy. You have to force yourself.” – Mel Robbins

“Anything that requires a break from routine requires force.” – Mel Robbins

 “You kill your own ideas because you do not act on it.” – Mel Robbins

Lesson: Write down the ideas that come to you and decide what you are going to act on.

CARRIE GREEN: Programming Your Mind for Success

Powerful Quote:

“Success is NO accident. Living an incredible life is NO accident. You have to do it on purpose. And it starts by knowing exactly what it is you want to achieve. Knowing why you want to achieve it. Knowing the kind of person you need to become in order to make it happen and then programming your mind to make it happen.” Carrie Green

Lesson: Be intentional with your actions. Program your mind with the belief that no matter what comes your way. You will figure it out.

Entrepreneurs need to be connected with their “why” and be able to focus on positive and empowering thoughts so they can get the results they are wanting to achieve. Success is about putting in the work or “hustle” as Gary Vaynerchuk puts it. You must be willing to put in uncommon dedication, commitment, and hours that when you work for someone else that you would not do. It is about making yourself do the things you know you should do but do necessarily “feel” like doing. You need to do it anyway in order to move forward. Stay committed to life-long learning and the application of put new ideas into practice. At the end of the day, you will turn the ordinary into extraordinary and you will become remarkable! People will be compelled to remark on their experience or connection with you.

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

9 Unconventional Ways to Showcase Your Business in the Marketplace

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If you are running a business, you should be spending most of your time focused on sales and marketing NOT on operational functions. We tend to get caught up in the operations making sure that everything is functioning like a machine. It is easy to feel exhausted by the end of the day and then realize that you did not put in the time into your sales and marketing efforts. You need to be doing one action step every day or else you can become irrelevant quickly.

Your marketing efforts do not have to take up every waking moment. It does need to be intentional and you need to create a strategy for execution. No matter what economy you are in, people are buying and selling products and services that meet their needs. It is up to you to share why they should choose you.

Sometimes you need to put a spin on an old marketing strategy and sometimes you need to stick with the tried and true.  Constantly test to see what works and what doesn’t. Ensure that you are measuring your results. What gets measured, can be managed.

Facebook Live – Allows you to interact with your audience in real time. You can make your business come alive versus people just seeing a traditional advertisement. Don’t be afraid to showcase your business by offering tips, tricks, strategies and solutions to common problems. Share milestones and celebration by allowing people to be a part of the action. Better yet, the low-cost marketing phenomenon with boost your credibility and your presence in the marketplace.

Host a Charity Event – Giving Back to the Community is one way to build your reputation as a go-giver.  There is no better PR than sharing what is happening the in the community and who is – doing good!

Collaborate with Others to Cross Promote – If you are selling candles, you may want to collaborate with someone who sells bath bombs and soaps to create that “spa” experience for your customers. Discover ways to create win-win solutions.

Sponsor a Local Event – Supporting your local business mixer gives you an opportunity to take step into the spotlight. Sponsors of events of usually receive public recognition and they are advertised in the marketing of the event.

Write An Article Or Blog For Your Website. Showcase yourself and position yourself as the expert in your field and the benefits people will gain by working with you. People are always asking themselves, “What is in it for me?” ask others to share your post with their audience.

Offer an Information Night. Find a sponsor or a low-cost space where you can share information to your audience on a pressing topic. By doing so you are giving people, a way to sample your work. You building rapport and the “know, like, trust” you factor before anyone will do business with you.

Volunteer at Conferences or Networking Events. Volunteering is a great way to meet new people and learn about what your audience is involved in and doing. You can make some great connections by being a part of the team putting on the event. The community is already there for you to start connecting with people and building those relationships. It is also a great way for you to step out of your comfort zone and do something new.

Build Your Online Persona. Get known as the go to resource for information. Share your articles, blogs, and ideas. Share curated content that is relevant to audience. Don’t be afraid to comment and offer tips and valuable information when responding to comments, posts, or online forums.

Offer Testimonials or Give Provide Referrals to the People Your Do Business With. What a better way to promote your business than promoting the people you do business with. Building and nurturing relationships are important in business. There is nothing more powerful than social proof and getting results.

Thanks to creativity and innovation most of the unconventional ways to grow your business are low-cost and can make a big impact. The biggest obstacle is that you could be getting in your own way by thinking you need to follow traditional marketing and sales strategies. Sometimes all it takes is trying out something new and see where it takes you. Exposure is the way people get to know about you and your business.

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

 

Are You Giving Away the Farm?

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How much is too much? As a business owner and entrepreneur I have asked myself this question over and over. In my mind the voices battle it out saying, “Don’t be too salesy. You are a teacher at heart.” When it is right to sell and when is it right to educate?  How much should I be sharing?

I say…give it all away!

No, I am not talking about giving away all your products and services for free!

I am saying you need to be sharing your best stuff! Your best information, tips, and techniques!

I can hear you from here…What? Has she gone mad?

No I have not gone mad!

I want to share with you what sharing your best stuff does!

Breakdown Barriers and Build Trust – As people see you interact online, read your articles or books, or hear you speak; they get to know you, your personality, and what matters to you. Ensure that you are sharing content that speaks to your core values and about what you stand for. People get to know, like, and trust you when you share content that resonates with them. It can about anything from the challenges you face whether it be creating engaging teams to your personal journey of empowering yourself at the gym. They want to know that they can trust and believe in you to do what you say you’re capable of doing. That is when they will consider working with you. Building the connection and relationship is important.

Establish Credibility – When you write articles, speak on stage, write a book, or share information with others even one on one, you are building your credibility. You are perceived as someone knowledgeable and helpful. If people implement what you share and get results, BOOM! You create loyalty. They will want to tell others about you and the VALUE you provide. You never know who you may inspire.

Extend Your Reach. Ideas are abundant. You will be continuously coming up with more awesome high value content. If your content helps people take a leap in the business or take the next step in their career and get the results they are looking for, don’t you think that they will want to share what your information, tips, and techniques have done for them? They will be champions of yours and want to share your content. The more people who have your content, the more chances your content will get shared with others. Be sharable!  At some point, you may put out an offer and people may jump at the opportunity to work with you directly because they have gotten to know you and the social proof is already there.

The question comes back to selling versus educating…

It is important to meet the emotional needs of your clients by sharing information with them that will help them make an informed decision. Is that selling or educating? There is a fine line. Can you do both? Absolutely! Pay attention to how you feel in the process and take note of the body language and how your clients appears to be feeling. If you notice that they seem disinterested or they are turning their body away from you, you may have given them too much and they are overwhelmed or you are not meeting their needs. You will know if you hit one extreme or the other.

Ask questions to make sure you are on the right track in meeting their needs. Find the right balance for each conversation you have and have them coming back for more of your great content!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

 

 

How to Get Rid of the Fear of ‘Putting Yourself Out There’ Once and For All

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Anyone who wants to grow in their business or in their leadership skills has to learn how to put themselves out there. Putting yourself out there doesn’t mean exposing yourself and every little intimate detail of your life. It is about getting out amongst people and learning about the world around you. The secret sauce is about being curious about what matters most to people and putting yourself out there.

“Believe that if you make courageous choices and bet on yourself and put yourself out there, that you will have an impact, as a result of what you do. And you don’t need to know now what that would be or how will it happen because no one ever does.” – Dick Costolo

Does thought of networking make you queasy?

If you’re shy and feel uncomfortable in networking situations, you might find yourself hiding behind your computer with every excuse why not to go to a networking event. You tell yourself you don’t really like to meet people. Although this may be true, the greater truth may be that you’re more afraid to fail in front of others or say the wrong thing. You may also be afraid to succeed, for the fear of the unknown and how your life will change. Uncertainty can hold you hostage and you may sabotage yourself by letting your imagination go wild with all the “what if” situations that would not support you. You are in the people business. You need to connect with people.

Imagine what it would be like to meet like-minded people who could introduce you to other like-minded people to ensure that your pipeline of clients is consistently filled forget the promotion you have been longing for. How would that feel?

Pretty amazing I bet!

People don’t know how great you are and until you show them. They want to know how you will help them. Don’t let your own fears hold you back from providing value to others.

Focus on providing value instead of focusing on your fear. Every person does not like to be put in the spotlight as they feel exposed and vulnerable. You may worry about what others will think of you or wonder if people will like you or your ideas. You may fear being rejected as the expert you see yourself to be. When it comes to your clients, who knows more about your subject matter than you? Most people are wondering what you are thinking about them and their ideas.

If you want to grow and being known as the go-to resource for expert, exposure in the marketplace if necessary. You have to take the risk of putting your ideas and opinions out there.

No, you won’t appeal to everyone but that’s the beauty of it.

This is the exact reason why there is such abundance in the world. Each individual cannot serve everyone and they may not appeal to everyone and that is okay. There is more than enough business to go around for everyone.

“You put yourself out there in the truest way you can and hope others do the same. You’ll connect or you won’t, but you did what you could. “ – Chris Crutcher

Shift your thinking from self-promotion to self-expression. You may think that self-promotion is bragging and conceited. Self-promotion is about promoting oneself and it doesn’t have to mean that you’re arrogant or that you’re better than the next person. If I’m hiring you to do a job, I will look for the person who can best represent themselves and what they stand for. It will come down to how they express themselves. How you express yourself and what you stand for and how you take interest in others will demonstrate your core values and what you believe in.

Whether you’re putting a post on social media or writing your bio for an article, you want to be able to express how you provide solutions and can help others along their journey. Your expression may be in the form of photos, comments, or sharing a little bit about yourself in order to make yourself relatable to those around you. Think about what you’re expressing and how it may help others. Does it inspire? Does it encourage action taking? Does it help people reflect and think about their own situations?

Take action now. Too many people talk themselves out of taking action because they feel that they’ve missed the opportunity but what they’re really doing is coming up with an excuse as to why they haven’t taken action. You can always find evidence for whatever you believe to be true as it is your reality. It is never too late. If you’re waiting for everything to be perfect, you will miss out on those opportunities. New opportunities will arise for you to take action on. Remember that your work in progress in you can adjust your course along the way.

Every successful story from Eleanor Roosevelt to Oprah Winfrey required that they put themselves out there regardless of their fears to share their voice. Their circumstances weren’t perfect. They grew and learned along the way and put new knowledge into action. As one action didn’t work they would try another while they stayed focused and determined to move forward.

You can create your success story by taking the actions required to put yourself out there even when you are afraid. Know that you’re never alone as the like-minded people around you are often experiencing the same thing that you are but never have had the courage to share it with you. As you put yourself out there, you’ll quickly learn that many feel the same as you and you can be reassured that the courage that it takes for you to push through your fears, shift your thinking and take imperfect action, you will be inspiring others to do the same.

Debra Kasowski is an award-winning 2X bestselling author, professional speaker, certified executive coach, and podcast host of The Millionaire Woman Show which discusses topics of leadership, business, and human potential. She has interviewed influencers like Bob Burg from the Go-Giver, Dr. Mark Goulston, John Lee Dumas from Entrepreneur on Fire, and TEDx Speaker Teresa de Grosbois. Debra has the heart of a teacher and certified in the areas of Emotional Intelligence and Appreciative Inquiry a positive approach to change. Her work has been published in a variety of traditional and online media. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com