Debra Kasowski, Author at Debra Kasowski

EPISODE 180 – Unlock Your Greatness

November 12, 2018 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

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“You were born with potential.
You were born with goodness and trust. You were born with ideals and dreams. You were born with greatness.
You were born with wings.
You are not meant for crawling, so don’t.
You have wings.
Learn to use them and fly.”
―Rumi

Everyone is born with the potential to be great. There are far too many people living below their potential – believing that greatness is not theirs. They tell themselves, “I am not good enough. I am not smart enough. Why would they think I am great?” Greatness is for everyone. Greatness is NOT a goal. It is a state of mind.

To be great…you need to discover your compelling “why” – your mission and vision…

Why do you do what you do? People are drawn to your “why” more than what you do. Many people can do what you do. It is your story that creates that personal connection with others.

To be great…you need to determine what you stand for – your core values…

What do you value? What is your personal code of honour? What are the deal breakers? These values are the ones that are your guiding light or moral compass in decision-making. You do not need to sacrifice your soul to please others. If you have struggles or conflict in interpersonal relationships, chances are you do not share the same values with the other person. Before you dismiss them, determine if this is true by asking questions to learn the other person’s values.

To be great…you need to examine your beliefs.

What thoughts do you believe to be true…about money, relationships, communication, men and women, success and failure, leading and following, etc. What you believe you will see. Our beliefs determine our actions and therefore our results.

To be great…you need to acknowledge and take responsibility for your gifts.

Not everyone is given the same gifts. We are all unique. You must take responsibility for your gifts. Learn about them. Refine them. Practice them. Adjust them. Own who you are because of them and what you do with those gifts. This “ownership” is what sets you apart from everyone else.

Hiding your gifts serves no one. I held back on sharing my gifts with others for a long time. I would share my gifts but not fully. As I had the belief, “now was not the time”, I would look like I was bragging, others may think I thought I was better than them, or I was being a show-off. What I learned is by holding back or hiding my gifts, I was not being the solution to the problem or puzzle where my gifts were needed, I was not inspiring others to use their gifts and live to their potential, and I was not letting people know I had the gifts, to begin with. Because of this, I missed out on opportunities.

The right time to share your gifts is NOW.

To be great…you need to focus on the power of the journey and not the destination.

There are many people who focus on the destination as their end goal of success. Once they get to the destination, they feel emotionally let down and say, “It this all there is.” Yet with all goals, you need to overcome your greatest challenges and sometimes travel the road less traveled. You defy the odds. It is the person you become along the journey that makes you great. You have faced adversity, obstacles, and challenges – and survived.

To be great…you need to learn to be decisive.

The Latin word for “decide” is “decidare” meaning “to cut off all possibilities.” Once you make a decision, you can create a plan and make your choice a reality. The more decisions you make, the more actions you take. The more actions you take, the more confidence you will have in yourself to take more action.

With every decision, there is an option…this or that…or many. Narrow down your options, make the pros and cons lists, and trust your gut. Every decision has more questions and decisions that can be made. With every decision, ask yourself, “Am I getting closer or moving away from where I want to go?”

To be great…you need to establish success habits.

Your routines are built from habits. What current habits serve you? What habits are not serving you? What habits do you need to change? What habits do you need to start? Habits can take anywhere from 21-66 days to develop and stick. Be patient with yourself and stay determined.

To be great…you need to develop an attitude of gratitude.

When you learn to be grateful for what you have and the opportunities you have been given, the more you will be given to be grateful for. Start with writing out 3 things you are grateful for every day.

To be great…you need to be gracious and accepting of yourself.

As humans, we are not perfect. Many people have a hard time accepting themselves because they fall short of the vision, they have for themselves. With their disappointment, they may stop taking action or give up on their dream and goals altogether. Do not let past events define you. Your current situation is NOT who you are. Do not let mistakes and failures define you. Learn from them. What can you do differently the next time?

“I was never afraid of failure; for I would sooner fail than not be among the greatest.” ―John Keats

Things do not always go the way we want them to – you need to continue to BELIEVE that possibilities exist and in your VALUE. Now is always too soon to quit! Keep working at it – go after whatever it is you are drawn to until you achieve it. For every problem has a solution. There is a key that opens the door. You just need to find it. Stay focused on your end goal, be open to possibilities, put in the effort, and expect to find success.

Start unlocking your greatness today!

We would love to have you subscribe to the Success Secrets newsletter on my website at www.debrakasowski.com where you’re going to get my just release FREE e-book about the 21 Habits High Achievers Kick to Achieve Success. I would love to hear about this podcast has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Share it with Your Friends. Give us a 5-star rating!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free e-book download today! www.debrakasowski.com

EPISODE 179 – Cutting the Chaos with Courage with Stephanie Hayes

November 6, 2018 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

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BIO SPECIAL GUEST:

With over 20 years of experience, Stephanie Hayes helps entrepreneurs, small business owners, and corporate executives who have plateaued or reached the edge of their comfort level to excel. Sought out because of her knack for being able to see the big picture and her expertise to design, plan, and implement the next phase of their business, Stephanie thrives in transforming the fears and struggles of her clients into opportunities and successes. Grab your gift from Stephanie Hayes www.stephaniehayes.biz/millionaire-woman

EPISODE 178 – Overcoming Resistance to Change

October 16, 2018 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

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“Most of us have two lives. The life we live and the unlived life within us. Between the two stands resistance.” Steven Pressfield

The thought of change is uncomfortable for many people. Change represents uncertainty. People are concerned about how a change will impact them. There is an underlying fear that the change will be “bad”. Is it natural for you to resist change? Resistance can make perfect sense for some people. They feel resistance is that “gut check” that maybe things are not as good as they appear. It is a matter of perception. The funny thing is…

People tend to resist change even when it is beneficial to them. Why? We are creatures of habit. We will do what makes us feel good and secure rather than what might be best for us. Change requires conscious action which means EFFORT. Is it that you may need to put in some work?

There are many reasons why YOU may be resisting change:

Lack understanding or lack of clarity about the need for change
Fear of the unknown
Fear of Failure or What Others Will Say
Lack Competence
Not competent
Low Trust – Change is not managed competently.
Temporary – “just a fad”
Not consulted for your opinion or expertise
Poor Communication
Exhaustion – Overworked
Change in Status Quo
Change in Routine
Benefits/rewards are not seen

Are you resisting change right now? Do any of these relate to you?

If you are helping people overcome resistance to change, do the following:

Be Clear on What Change is Taking Place
Align with Your Goals
Determine the Impact of the Change and Resisting the Change
Set a Communication Strategy – it is better to overcommunicate versus under communicate
Provide Effective Training (if required)
Identify and Share Your Support Structure or Resources
Measure and Adjust as You Move Through Change

Change is important and a necessary part of life. It represents progress and growth. Change brings new possibilities and problems.

The opposite of “change” is acceptance. The beauty of life is that it is unpredictable and uncertain. One thing I know for sure is that everything is temporary and nothing is permanent. Everything changes. We need to learn to accept things as they happen and only focus on what is in our control. Do not judge. As soon as you start to judge, you lose out on opportunity.

Acceptance does not mean you are conforming and saying, “It is what it is.” Or settling for average. You can choose to let go of things that are not in your control. There are many times in our lives we think things should be a certain way and they are not. You can fail to accept reality or you can fight it. You cannot change situations by fighting them.

Carl Jung once said, “What you resist, persists.”

Several years ago, I remember my boss telling me I needed to get more experience with managing people. It was not about building and nurturing relationships as it was dealing with and managing conflict. No sooner that the day after I inked a SMART goal did conflict come fast and furious – 3 incidents in fact. They were uncomfortable I wanted to avoid them. However, I knew I needed to face them head on, otherwise, the heat of the emotions would get high. Sometimes you may not understand change, ask questions and be curious about the impact on you, your situation, or environment. Learn what you can about the emotions involved, Any resistance faced with help you understand why some people get further ahead than others, Stubbornness can cause missed opportunities!

What are you resisting in your life right now?

EPISODE 177 – Be the Hero of Your Own Story

October 9, 2018 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

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“A hero is someone who has given his or her life to something bigger than oneself.” – Joseph Campbell

Have you ever wondered about what it takes to be considered a hero or heroine? I am not talking about dressing up for Halloween or the need to don a mask or cape. What does being a hero or heroine represent to you? For me, when I think of a hero, I think qualities and characteristics of courage, confidence, speaking with conviction about a cause, and someone who rises up to the occasion to be their best self no matter what the cost.

Heroes are not just the people you see featured as sports stars on the news or celebrities in the movies. Heroes do things to change the world. You do not need to change the “whole” world to be a hero. You can change one person’s world for a moment and be a hero. You can even be a hero in everyday activities. You can help someone balancing many bags or parcels cross the street so they do not drop things. You can put extra money in a meter so someone doesn’t get a parking ticket. You can bring a cup of tea or coffee to someone you are meeting up with or pick up the tab of the person behind you at the drive-through. I am certain you can come up with more ideas. A hero knows you need a network of people or a tribe with resources to make an impact. Share your ideas.

Heroes inspire us by example. We are in “awe” of their actions and decisions. They connect with us on an emotional level. What is it about them that creates an “awe” factor? The AWE often comes from:

Accomplishments and accolades
Placing their lives in danger for us
Being courageous
Defending and protecting
Willingness to step up and act
Concern for others in need

You can be an everyday hero or heroine. Learn from your heroes or heroines. What are their successes? Failures? Be inspired by their efforts and learn how they stayed strong in front of challenges. Be prepared to sacrifice and put others needs in front of your own. Many Moms and Dads out there are doing that every day providing for their families. Share your ideas and dreams with others. There are opportunities to be a hero or heroine all around you.

You can get started today by letting go of any ego. Focus on what you need to do rather than receiving praise. Plan your actions around being the change you wish to see. Rather than wait for others to make a positive change, you can initiate it. Don’t be afraid to ask someone if they need your help. They might not be asking because they feel they are imposing.

Know your purpose. Share your vision and make thing happen! You are the change – make it great.

“A hero is an ordinary individual who finds strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.” – Christopher Reeve

EPISODE 176 – Fear, Success, and Sabotage

October 1, 2018 by Debra Kasowski Leave a Comment

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“The ego mind both professes its desire for love and does everything possible to repel it, or if it gets here anyway, to sabotage it. That is why dealing with issues like control, anger, and neediness is the most important work in preparing ourselves for love.”

– Marianne Williamson

Have you ever felt a deep passion for what you do and why you do it? A passion that the thought of not doing it brings you to tears. Knowing your purpose in life is one of the most amazing experiences in your life. Yet it is easy to get detoured away from your true calling. The lure can be well-intended individuals in your life who think they know what is best for you. They are the ones who want you to play safe and stay small because of their own fears and insecurities. It is bad enough we have our own self-doubts we do not need others to confirm those beliefs to be true. These people do not want to see you fail; they want you to play safe for, “What if you fail? Will you be okay?”

What is actually happening is that they are fearful of their own potential failures. They are mirroring this onto you. They are afraid to take chances and your courageousness scares them. You look bold and aware, and fearless. They believe they cannot measure up to you. They get scared, “How can you possibly grow, stretch and reach for your greatness without me?” They start to sabotage your progress with neediness, control, or even anger. They need your attention on them, not on your goals. There is a shift that happens when they realize you are going to achieve your goals and you’re not afraid to fail along the way. You are confident and reassured. Do not let the fears of others dictate your actions.

You have fears, you just don’t allow FEARS to dictate your reality. When you operate from a place of fear, you get anxious, scared, and worry about things. Your imagination takes off. Your mind does not focus on the rewards and the great things that are going to happen to you. No! You think about all the worst-case scenarios. Things that usually never happen. Fear and love cannot exist together. When you are in a state of fear, you do not act or behave the same as you do from a state of LOVE. Love is trusting. It focuses on positive outcomes, whereas, fear spirals into a world of negativity and self-destruction. Choose love.

You can sabotage yourself when you start comparing yourself to others – wanting and desiring what another person has. You never think you are good enough, smart enough, deserving enough but why? You see one moment in time and envy’s ugly head appears. I bet you would not want to wipe out all your memories to live in another person’s shoes or lifetime.

Regret is worse than failing. I often think about all the things I want to achieve in my lifetime. I think of not doing what I am doing and it brings me to tears. When I am eighty years old, I do not want to have regrets saying, “I wish I would have… or If I only…or I should have…” This focus of energy is unproductive. Keep your focus on the goal or dream in front of you. If you feel overwhelmed, think of all the small steps you can take to get closer to your goals and dreams.

Challenge yourself to become better than yesterday. Look for ways you can constantly improve. Take risks. Move forward. Maintain a positive attitude and do not allow yourself to give up!

If you are passionate about something and it makes the world a better place to be, by all means, pursue it! Go after it. The world needs more of it. Imagine if everyone was focused on living out their purpose and giving their best. Wow! We would be amazed.

Are you allowing others to sabotage you or are you doing that job yourself?

Albert Einstein said, “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

What are you going to do differently?