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John Lee Dumas is the host of EOFire, where he interviews today’s most successful Entrepreneurs 7-days a week. JLD has grown EOFire into a multi-million dollar a year business with over 1500 interviews and 1.5 million monthly listens. His latest project is The Mastery Journal: Master productivity, discipline and focus in 100 days. Learn more at TheMasteryJournal.com!
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“The victim mindset dilutes the human potential. By not accepting personal responsibility for our circumstances, we greatly reduce our power to change them.”
― Steve Maraboli
Personal accountability is about acting in alignment and doing what we say we’re going to do. It truly is about taking 100% responsibility for one’s own actions. By taking personal accountability, you are taking steps to improve yourself as a leader – a leader that people can know and like as well as trust. You can always recognize someone who is not accountable for their actions by listening to their language. People who are not accountable for their actions play the victim role. These are the people who tend to ignore or deny their involvement in the part of a situation. They tend to blame or complain about others as to why they’re not getting the results that they want. They explained all the reasons why they shouldn’t be held accountable for their actions or the results achieved. If you really want to get the results you say you want, your greatest success weapon is about becoming and accountable leader.
Being accountable isn’t always easy. There’s increased responsibility and expectations on ourselves to achieve more. If you are consistent and work hard, you will often end up achieving more than you believe possible. The impossible became possible when people took the necessary actions steps consistently to get to where they want to go. Being accountable can position you to feel unstoppable. You will learn to trust yourself and your abilities for getting those results. The other day I briefly watched a segment of @garyvee (Gary Vaynerchuk) and he said that most people are walking around like they’re coming back. This struck a chord with me. It may be due to my nursing background and having held a baby after its first breath and also holding the hand of someone who is dying and takes their last. Life is too short to not put in 100% effort. People tend to be scared of that accountability factor maybe because they think someone’s checking up on them. The only person checking up on you is yourself and holding yourself to a higher standard.
When you hold yourself accountable, you realize that you need to start making decisions with intention. Every decision you make has an outcome. The results you see around you are based on the decisions you have made so far. If you don’t like what you see, you need to start making different choices. Your choices might include taking a course in gaining more knowledge, reaching out and asking for help, going to a networking event and building the relationships around you, and providing feedback to your team so they can improve. If you hold yourself back from being the best that you can be, you will fall short and may even fail just because you weren’t willing to take responsibility for the actions that you took.
Being a victim of your circumstances is a choice. You can choose to respond or you can choose to react to any situation. Those who play the victim are often reactive by placing blame and getting angry without doing any or self-reflection on their role in the situation. If you catch yourself going into the victim’s state, you can always stop and reframe the situation and choose to become more responsive. In the problem shows up, don’t ignore it and pretend it’s not there think about how you can solve it versus resist it. Is there a chance that you can make a mistake? Absolutely! Maya Angelou said, “When you know better, you do better.” You can always course correct do not let the fear of making a mistake holds you back from making potentially the greatest leap forward.
When you start owning your stuff by being accountable for your actions, you will be able to be successful in pushing through the challenges you face. When you don’t, you begin to resent others and people will have a hard time trusting you. You need to begin by taking charge of who you are and how you wish to show up. One of the things that I noticed is a leader is that often people do not realize that they have the power to be part of significant change because they have a choice to engage or not engage in their environment. Individuals need to realize how much power they actually have to get the results they envision. When they start sharing that vision with others, other people in the group may also offer ideas and solutions to make them become reality. The employee tends to be more engaged because they were part of the solution.
In order to be an accountable leader, you need to be open to a new perspective and challenge your own assumptions. When I teach emotional intelligence, it’s all about becoming self-aware and taking responsibility for our thoughts, feelings, and the actions we take. You need to be aware of self-limiting beliefs as well as your own flaws of perfectionism and even procrastination. These are forms of resistance in preventing you from being accountable for your actions. Perfection can delay results and procrastination may mean that you never get started.
As a coach, I have been able to recognize when someone is spiraling into a victim mentality. I always find it interesting that we can see the potential in others before we see the potential in ourselves. The individuals that I have coached are great leaders bursting out and stepping into their greatness. Some of the roadblocks that they face tend to be more internal than external. They have self-limiting beliefs and self-doubt about their ability to accomplish what they set their mind to. Asking for help is considered to be a strength and it helps you examine what needs to improve to get you to where you want to go. Your mindset is a key part of defining some of the actions that you’re going to take. If you don’t believe something is possible, you’re not going to take actions that organize support you and therefore not get the results that you want. If you don’t believe you deserve something, again you’ll find ways to self-sabotage getting the results that you want. Pay attention to what is going on in your mind because it impacting the actions you take.
You won’t be disappointed by taking accountability for your actions. You will gain respect and trust as being someone who walks their talk. You will start getting the results that you truly want instead of looking out toward for success on the outside you’ll realize that success begins with you. The richness of your life and your business or organization starts with you.
“If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month.”
― Theodore Roosevelt
We would love to have you subscribed to the Success Secrets newsletter on my website at www.debrakasowski.com where you’re going to get us free MP3 download 10 Surefire Strategies to Power Up Your Productivity and Performance. I would love to hear about this podcast has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Share it with Your Friends. Give us a 5-star rating!
DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com
Time: 11:08 min
Keywords: holding yourself accountable, accountability, accountable, podcast, being an accountable leader, taking responsibility, victim mentality, coaching, choice, decision making, accountability partner
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[embedyt] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABZiHdyAQ-c[/embedyt]
Robyn’s “Lightening captured in a bottle that zaps you into a new way of thinking…”
Everyday communication is like mixing up chemicals. Sometimes it creates exciting discoveries… sometimes it just blows up!
Robyn Hatcher, communication expert and author, knows successful communication is the life blood of any thriving organization. Robyn’s cultivated a formula to transform weak communication skills into potent business gold.
Her 15 plus years as a professional actress and her experience as a certified Neural Linguistic Programming practitioner, give her a powerful combination of creative tools and scientific research.
Now, as owner and CEO of SpeakEtc., she delivers the brain science hacks that help business leaders command a room; galvanize a team and become a catalyst for change.
Robyn has elevated the communication skills for Fortune 500 companies and noteworthy brands, including Lifetime Television, Jones New York, AXA, UBS, Hewlett-Packard and others. Robyn’s first book, Standing Ovation Presentations (Motivational Press, 2013), contains a unique communication style system called ActorTypes. and was named on Forbes.com as one of 2015’s Top 100 Coaching Books.
Robyn wants everyone to become more powerful, engaging and confident communicators.
Time: 43:23 min
Keywords: Communication, body language, effective communicator, Tone of voice, networking, networking etiquette, language, labels, podcast
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Episode 17 – Harness the Power of Momentum
There are no limits to what you can achieve if you stay focused on what you are trying to achieve. You need to believe the impossible is possible for you. Your results may be better than you expect. Success has no guarantees; each action you take starts creating a momentum. If you stop taking action, you stop the momentum.
“Always work hard. Intensity clarifies. It creates not only momentum, but also the pressure you need to feel either friction, or fulfillment.”
— Marcus Buckingham
During my coaching program, we learned about Creative Tension – It moves us to take action. It helps us get out of our comfort zone and stretch us. Challenge us.
Why do we need it? What does it do?
Momentum helps us:
You are responsible for creating it through consistent actions. A rapid succession of successes and lessons drives momentum. Energy increases; it will be natural for others to want to follow you. You will become magnetic. You will start to inspire others around you.
Momentum is ignited when you have a clear vision – you know what you want to achieve, you are able to articulate and share your vision, and you can enroll others in your vision.
Do you want to get more clarity? Read my book GPS Your Best Life
Believe in your ability to make things happen. Your confidence, energy, and enthusiasm with excite others around you.
You are probably thinking to yourself – but how do I create a momentum – especially when times are tough or you are feeling challenged more than you think you can handle.
I want to share with you some of the ways that have worked for me and some of the clients I have worked with.
Deliver value and look for ways to exceed expectations. You will generate excitement in others and they will be grateful and share their experience with you – with others.Everything will move so much quicker with the momentum.
What happens when you stop running on a treadmill or riding a bike?
You stop moving – you fall off.
Worry and doubt can paralyze you from taking forward action. They drain your energy. Challenge yourself – test your theories. Ask questions. Gain knowledge – but don’t stop unless you know you are in danger.
No one is going to jail or getting hurt or killed in the process chances are whatever happens you can course correct.
We all start somewhere. There have been many successful people who did not start with any resources – no network of people, no money, no knowledge, did not know English or a language of the place they settled in. They built it and so can you.
“Always do your best. What you plant now, you will harvest later.” — Og Mandino
Success is not about how many resources you have; it is about being resourceful and leveraging your resources in the most effective way. Focus on taking action and over time a compound effect with occur. If you are focused only on short-term activities to get immediate results, you will lose momentum quickly especially if you do not set a new target that stretched you.
Your efforts make a difference in how you feel about your progress and what you are going to achieve.
Let your efforts multiply!
Success comes from taking the initiative and following up…persisting…eloquently expressing the depth of your love. What simple action could you take today to produce a new momentum toward success in your life?
— Tony Robbins
You need to continually set new challenges to learn and grow. Acknowledge how far you have come. Reflect on what you can do better and work to improve.
DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com
Time: 16:31 min
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EPISODE 16 – Challenges Make You Stronger
Challenges are a part of everyday life. A challenge is something that pushes you out of your comfort zone. It can be something you challenge yourself with such as a goal or it could be something presented to you such as learning something new, getting a handle on finances, acquiring your next client, or seeking a promotion. Some challenges are easier than others. Some challenges knock us down for the count. Think about how many times you get up to face a challenge – that will determine whether or not you will push through it.
If you let the first time you knock you down; you will be paralyzed. I remember the first time someone unsubscribed to my newsletter. I was just devastated because of the one subscription. In that moment, I had forgotten about the hundreds of people who were subscribed. Maybe it was not the right fit for them. What I realize now is that people come into your life for a certain amount of time, a reason or a purpose and some people fade away. Understand that when we face those challenges not to take it so personally and feel defeated. It is about being able to rise up and embrace the challenges and move forward.
It was once said by someone that, “Challenges make you more responsible. Always remember that life without struggle is a life without success. Don’t give up and learn not to quit.”
Challenges make a person more resilient. You recognize your emotions that arise in different situations and how to manage them to become a better communicator or influencer. You become more self-aware of what you want and what you do not want. You develop clarity. You learn from mistakes. Don’t punish yourself. You are growing and stepping into the potential of who you are meant to be.
You can either let a challenge pull you down or you can use it to rise up.
There was a personal challenge I faced when swimsuit shopping with my daughter. I had sent my daughter to go and purchase herself a swimsuit for a surprise trip. I was unable to go with her. She came home a tossed the bag to me and I did not think anything of it. She did not even show me what it looked like until we were leaving and then I realized that there was a $200 + price tag to this swimsuit. I was like, “What?” I am sorry I do not understand what 16 year old needs a two hundred dollar swimsuit. Anyhow, we ended up going on our trip and did not end up going swimming anyway but I knew a swimsuit you cannot return.
We had come home and we were leaving in a couple more weeks to go on vacation. We ended up going back to the same store where she had purchased the swimsuit. As she was trying on bathing suits, I could feel myself boiling inside even though the staff was wonderful to her. I was thinking to myself, “Why would anyone want in in a suit that makes her so much older that she did not feel energized and excited in?” She did not even feel comfortable in it. We ended up going swimming shortly after our surprise trip and she discovered that the suit did not fit properly.
As I was standing there, I could feel myself boiling inside. It is about being able to recognize those emotions. It was a challenge for me to think about how I was going to manage these emotions. It was my problem. The people in the store do not know what is bothering me. As it was getting close to closing time, the staff was being very patient and had no problem waiting for to finish trying on another suit. We did not end up buying a suit. [We had gone to another store and paid $20 for a swimsuit and going on our vacation. She was youthful, energized, and loved the suit that she had.]
Meanwhile, I was quite frustrated as I was waiting for my daughter to finish up so I started to talk to the clerk. I proceeded to tell her about how I was feeling and how I was boiling inside. If I felt this energy, I could not imagine how and if they felt it. I began to share the story of what happened when my daughter had come for a swimsuit. The young lady at the till was phenomenal. She said “You should not have had that type of experience that is not how we work here.” She took my information. I informed her that we were leaving the next day on vacation. I told that I would not be able to deal with this right now. She said that it was okay and that she would speak to her manager to see what she could do for me.
She had phoned the very next day explaining that they were going to be doing something for me. I decided while I was on vacation that I would not deal with it until I got home. When I came home I called them, they had offered me a 20% discount. I thought you know it is a swimsuit; they are not going to return it. We already spent $200 in their store for something we were not happy with. She asked me if I was going to pick up the 20% off coupon and I stated, “I am not sure I am going to but thank you very much for your time. We will just take this as a loss.”
Not even 5 minutes later, she had called back. A district manager had heard her talking to me; she had explained that she could not return the bottoms. I stated that I understood based on my healthcare background. If I brought back the top, they would give me a full refund for the cost of the top to purchase anything else in the store. I said that was reasonable and that was something I could handle.
Again I was unable to go with my daughter so I spoke with the young lady that was working with her that I would be unable to be there. My daughter went in and they spent a lot of individualized – personalized attention with her. She came home with a new top to match her bottoms and a racer swimsuit for swimming lengths. She pulled it out and went to try it on to show me right away. She ended up getting two suits in the end.
What impressed me most was the young lady that was working with us. She put in a lot of effort; she was phenomenal. When I speak in front of groups, I talk about this young lady all the time. I went into the store a few days later and I had asked one of the other girls, “Can you tell me who the top person is, that I can talk to in your company? They gave me the President – they gave me all these people. I sent the lengthy e-mail. They are just in the swimsuit industry. They are in the industry of self-esteem, confidence, and help people feeling comfortable in the skin and that they are in.
I find it so powerful to be able to know that you’re doing more than just providing a product – more than a business transaction so I e-mailed a lengthy e-mail. I wanted this individual to be recognized. We were going to recognize her in our own way but we wanted somebody you higher up to realize the potential of this young lady and the difference she was making them from of life. I received an e-mail back from the owner of the company and she had forwarded our e-mail to the whole distribution list of all of their employees to realize that this is what they’re in business for and that they would recognize this young lady and in some way.
My daughter had gone a few days later and handed a little gift to this employee. She was nearly in tears for being recognized for going above and beyond her call of duty. How often do we do that – where we want to go the extra mile for our clients or customers making them feel that they matter?
These challenges that we face make us so much better. They make us so much stronger and we would never realize the impact it can have on other people because what I realized is that if I never speak up when I recognize an emotion that I have, either to clarify something with someone or to express how I’m feeling about a situation, this all would never have happened. When we talk about emotional intelligence, people say, “Oh, that’s the soft stuff!” Even though it is soft, it’s about people and making sure that people matter and how were communicating is a big deal. Think about how you communicate and how some of those challenges have come through communication.
Big Breath! I know that was heavy!
SPONSOR – LET’S BE CURIOUS! www.letsbecurious.ca
It really does amaze me how including me, can take things for granted until we are faced with a challenge. I remember completing a triathlon after not putting in a lot of training several years after I had done the course. Holy Man! I was in awe of what I had accomplished that I never credited myself for. The hard work and dedication it took to take on the challenge and to really acknowledge the sacrifices that went with it. Swim, bike, run. I was never a star athlete. I challenged myself to do what I saw other do. If they could do it, so could I.
One of the biggest challenges I see people face is often self-induced through the comparison trap. Comparing our self to others leads to a no win situation. Your intentions end up reflecting a competition and beating someone versus becoming better and being a natural choice. Start turning inward and set challenges for yourself – each day to become a better version of your Self today than you were yesterday. Become a better listener. Become a better employee. Become a better spouse. Become a better parent. Become a better boss. Hone your skills. Fine tune your strengths. The competition is with your Self. Beat your old self – running your own race.
Stop complaining about your circumstances. There are people who are in more delicate situations that you are right now. Some people are wishing they could walk or even run a race. Some people are fighting for their breath. Some people would love to have the job or business you do; due to health issues may not be able to do so.
Quit making excuses about all the reasons success has not happened for you yet. True success – sustainable success takes time and consistency. Are you using your time productively or are you getting sucked into the vortex of social media? Following blue links or just checking to see if someone just someone liked your post.
Stop blaming others for your position in life. You may hear people blaming their parents, spouse, kids, or boss for their position in life or their lack of resources for not being further ahead. You are in charge of you and the decisions that you make.
Who you are… is directly related to the life you have led and the choices you have made. As a child, your parents may have taught you a certain way of doing things. As you became your own person, you started to make your own decisions and choices. You could believe old patterns and beliefs or you could choose your own story of how things played out and how things have yet to be. Others have made choices and passed on their beliefs based on what they believe to be true. Do not be afraid to question, challenge assumptions, or offer a new perspective. You may have heard the story about a young adult preparing a roast after they were newly married. They cut off each end of the roast and placed in the roasting pan. When questioned and the person asked, “Why did you cut the ends off?” They replied that is how we have always done it – my mother did it that way and her mother did it that way.
What are you doing just because others do it that way?
Start viewing your challenges as blessings or opportunities. Write in a journal and start coming up with solutions to your challenges. Choose the story you want to hear and live. Remember your perception and what you believe is your reality. Is it the right belief? Is that what you want to believe?
Stay focused on the positive aspects of what you are trying to achieve. Be a “positive Choose to approach each day – “Today is going to be a great day!” – Speak it into existence. Connect with others and build relationships now – before you need them. If you do not have a support system, start creating one – people you know, like, and trust and who challenge you to become a better version of yourself.
“Handicaps often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny.”
C.S. Lewis
DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com
Time: 19:34 min