Debra Kasowski

Why Your Attitude Matters

by Leave a Comment

Although skill, ability, and having the right opportunity seem to be stepping stones to success, the one game-changing quality that makes the biggest difference is a person’s attitude. A person’s attitude will determine their altitude in achieving success. If someone needed a tiebreaker in determining the best-qualified candidate for the position, the selection would come down to a person’s attitude. Your attitude is how you approach life.

“Life is 10 percent what you make it
and 90 percent how you take it.”
― Irving Berlin

Attitude Awareness

Attitude is one of the most important predictors of your success. Your perspective on life will determine how you cope with trials and triumphs of life. Your attitude awareness impacts your thoughts and how you feel. How you feel you translate into your actions. If you are feeling positive and upbeat, you are more likely to greet people with a compliment or a simple, “Good Day!” instead of responding negatively, “What makes it a good day?” People are attracted to positive energy; they want to be around people who uplift them and make them feel good about themselves and the world around them.

When you recognize the attitude that you are portraying, you can adjust it accordingly when you notice that it’s tending to the negative. Negativity as well is positivity can permeate the environment around you. As a leader, you want to ensure that you bring forth a positive attitude so that the people who follow you do so in turn. This impacts the people that you serve not only each other but who you’re ultimately there for.

Attitude Determines Your Resiliency

Your attitude is a foundation to your success. Although we would love for life to stay at the all-time high, we know that everyone in life faces challenges. It is how we move through that challenge that makes the difference. Attitude is a choice. Sometimes you may forget that you have a choice as to what attitude you wish to have. When you realize that you have a choice, you can then get on the right track. You become more resilient when you choose a positive outlook because you will be open to possibility and opportunity. If you choose to have a negative outlook on life you will be inclined to focus on problems, not solutions. Seeing the possibilities encourages creativity and innovation and allows you to move through challenges more quickly.

Attitude Conquers Fear

Developing a positive attitude means that you are developing an attitude that is stronger in faith than the fear. When people make decisions or take actions based on fear, they often make the wrong choices and do not get the results or outcomes that they hoped for. When you are able to maintain a positive attitude, you are not driven solely on the emotion you are able to look at facts, and you’re able to think clearly about what direction you want to take. Your attitude will determine how persistent you will be in the face of obstacles and you will be able to trust yourself and your ability to move through them. You have faced obstacles before. Think about the patterns and your approach to how you face those obstacles in the past. They will help you determine some of the actions that you need to do moving forward when making decisions or taking the next steps. Be open to new information that will support you in reaching the outcomes you want to achieve. Let your faith in yourself and your people be stronger than the fear of uncertainty or failure.

“We cannot change our past… we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you… we are in charge of our Attitudes.”
― Charles R. Swindoll

The attitude that you choose to have can take you on the ascent of new heights or can pull the rug from under you and descend you to the beginning. Your attitude is a choice. A choice to rise above any challenges you face and to persevere knowing that you will achieve what you go after.

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Debra is the host of The Millionaire Woman Show podcast focusing on helping people live rich from the inside out through leadership, business, and human potential. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

How to Become an Effective Leader by Building Resiliency

by Leave a Comment

You don’t have to go far to learn about some of the challenges people are facing in their businesses and organizations. You just have to turn on the news or look around you. There appears to be a great strain on society today being so busy that they are unable to find equilibrium. People are asked to do more with less. People look busy running from one activity to the next but are they productive? Are they meeting their deadlines or quotas?

The one constant in everyone’s life is change. We are all faced with changes and challenges on a day-to-day basis. One of the greatest challenges that leaders within organizations face is being able to keep up with their workloads while putting out fires that seem to arise. They are taken away from some of their critical work to focus intently on performance issues. Managing people and working with people can sometimes be draining especially when you’re faced with resistance and lack of awareness. Sometimes it feels like no matter how much effort you put into something that you are unable to achieve what you hope to. At times this can be disheartening for a leader to lead because they may lose sight of their focus and the meaning of the work that they were driven to do. Don’t give in and don’t give up! Adapt!

“Life doesn’t get easier or more forgiving, we get stronger and more resilient.”
― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

Effective leaders become resilient through self-reflection and an increased self-awareness. Not only are the intellectual but they are emotionally intelligent. Resilience is the characteristic of being able to bounce back in the face of loss or failure. A resilient leader does not play victim to their circumstance. They shift into the mindset of a learner and so can you.

Everything is not in your control so don’t take things personally. Sometimes things in life occur that we do not expect and planning and preparation could not prevent them from occurring. Know that many things occur that are not in your control and it’s not your fault. You can only take ownership of things that you can do something about.

Resilient leaders know that it’s important to continue developing personally and professionally in order to embrace change and challenges. When people face a crisis or cutbacks, one of the first areas that seem to be eliminated is that of personal and professional development. This is a grave mistake as when people are learning and growing they are inspired and can cultivate new ideas and solutions to the challenges that they face. Never stop learning!

A resilient leader knows that it’s imperative to celebrate success even in the midst of a challenge. There is an opportunity to learn from success just as much as failure. Examine steps, processes, and strategies that help you develop success; they can be your greatest tools in helping you navigate some of your roadblocks.

Many of the greatest leaders have demonstrated that it’s important to take the time to recharge and rejuvenate in order to become a resilient leader in bounce back from trying situations. Meditation, prayer, and journaling are just some of the rituals that some of these leaders use to gain clarity on some of the significant situations that they face and eliminate the distractions from seeing clearly. Other leaders enjoy going for a walk in nature or a run to clear their mind.

Resilient leaders know that it is important to focus on the type of climate they want to create. They imagine the possibilities and articulate a new vision for the future. They pay attention to the words they use and ensure that they are creating a positive future – a future that taps into the strengths of the people who follow them. They know that open communication is the key to leading the way.

An effective leader knows that they do not have all the answers to every situation that they have the ability to tap into the strengths, opinions, and best experiences of their people. They draw on these perspectives and engage their people in coming up with new ideas in helping provide a solution to the challenges they face. By engaging their people, they know that the people will be intrinsically motivated to move toward a shared vision.

The resilient leader is someone who has been able to develop the skill of managing their own emotions and recover quickly. There are many characteristics and styles of leadership; however, emotional intelligence is a skill that is a must in building resilience.

“Shift your attention, and your emotion shifts. Shift your emotion, and your attention shifts.”
― Frederick Dodson

Optimism helps effective leaders maintain focus on their vision even when faced with setbacks. They choose to look for “what is good or right” about a situation. They know that wherever your intention goes your attention follows. They look on the bright side of every situation looking for the opportunity to learn and grow so that they may become more effective.

Leaders know that it’s important to build and nurture a network of relationships before you need them. When you are in crisis or faced with the challenge, you need to have that support immediately and if you don’t have it is more challenging to get through the tough times. When you build relationships, people are quick to reciprocate and support each other lessening the challenges.

Bouncing back to become the leader you want to be involves remembering your “WHY”. Why do you do the work that you do? Rediscover and connect with what she once was passionate about. See the importance in the work that you do. Your efforts do not go unnoticed although at the time it sometimes feels like it. Know that you are making an impact in this world even if you don’t receive immediate feedback. There will be a tipping point in which your efforts will have compounded and made the biggest difference. Bounce back and be strong – people are looking for a leader like you.

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Why Optimism Beats Pessimism

by Leave a Comment

You are faced with a variety of life events and circumstances every day. Each event or situation can be viewed in a positive or negative way. Your perspective is your outlook on the world around you. According to psychologists, you are either an optimist viewing the world from the viewpoint of a glass “half-full” or a pessimist viewing the world as a glass “half-empty”. For the most part, you are not happy or sad 100% of the time but you will lean more to one or the other disposition predominantly. Which one are you?

“Optimism is a strategy for making a better future. Because unless you believe that the future can be better, you are unlikely to step up and take responsibility for making it so.”
― Noam Chomsky

The Optimist

Optimism is defined as taking on a favorable view of events or circumstances and to expect positive outcomes. Optimistic character symbols are the fish Dory from the Disney Film Finding Nemo with her positive attitude and phrase, “Just Keep Swimming” demonstrating persistence. The Donkey from the movie Shrek does not seem to let anything bother him – everything just rolls off his back. The Disney character Goofy seems to do things without doubting of things with work out; he just does. You may see these characters as overly optimistic but it helps them face any adversity that comes their way.

Optimistic people look for the good in situations and believe that most people’s actions are filled with good intentions. They have a “can-do” attitude and see negative events as a temporary setback and see these hardships as learning opportunities for growth. They persist when faced with adversity. An optimistic person practices gratitude and acknowledges what is going well. They are positive and are confident in their abilities. When optimistic people share the events of their day, they tend to focus on sharing good events over negative ones. Uncertainty does not throw optimists off track; they see unscheduled or unplanned events as an opportunity and adventure to be seized.

The Pessimist

Pessimists are in the state of mind of expecting only the worst outcomes. These people have similar characteristics to the characters of Chicken Little who created a widespread panic that the sky was falling when it was only an acorn that fell, Charlie Brown was full of dread, negativity and worry, and Eeyore who was full of doom and gloom. People with these pessimistic characteristics can wear on the patience of others and suck the energy out of a room.

Pessimistic people believe that negative events were caused by them. What power they have! They believe that one mistake leads to a Domino Effect of mistakes. If something positive was to occur to them like a promotion or winning a prize, they would attribute these successes to luck, chance, or a fluke accident and the likelihood of it ever happening again was nearly impossible.

A pessimist can cause habit in the marketplace, business, or organization. They can negatively influence their employees, colleagues, and co-workers. I have watched this happen and it can move like wildfire. They start demonstrating poor work habits, carelessness, and lack of motivation. They become distracted and disengaged with the people who they are serving. Stress increase as these individuals gossip and complain. Others start to dread coming to work. They see setbacks as permanent and they are less flexible in challenging their perspective. There is increased fear, worry, and anxiety about the future which in turn impacts productivity and performance and thus the bottom line – profits.

Ultimately, optimism beats pessimism. Optimists live longer healthier lives. They have lower stress levels because they do not allow situations and life circumstances to dictate their happiness. They tend to be more successful and have increased productivity. Optimism impacts your overall well-being – it “feels good” to be positive and uplifting.

“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.”
― Mahatma Gandhi

Way to Beat the Doom and Gloom of Pessimism

  • Challenging assumptions by questioning your thoughts (Is your thought true?)
  • Reframe negative thoughts into positive thoughts
  • Learn from mistakes and adjust your course by doing it again until you get it
  • “Act as if”; be who you need to be now to achieve what you are trying to succeed at. Do not wait to be in the leadership role to become a leader.
  • Look for the good and what you have to be grateful for. The more you are grateful for, the more that will show up in your life to be grateful for.

Each day we have a choice. Which perspective will you choose – the optimist or the pessimist? At the end of the day, optimism beats pessimism. You cannot help wanting to be a part of the positive energy; it contagious. What attitude do you want to spread? How full or empty is your glass?

I believe it is not how full or empty your glass is what determines the quality of your life; it is about the people you meet, the places you travel to, and choices you choose to fill it with. Seize the opportunities live life to its fullest and drink up!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

How to Shift Out of Negative Thinking to Positive Thinking

by Leave a Comment

Everyone has their own story of how their day went. What you see and how you think all depends on what you focus on. A positive thinker, the optimist, will share their story with excitement ensuring they don’t miss out on the details. They are hopeful and anticipate that good things will happen in the future. Whereas the negative thinker, the pessimist has a tendency to see the worst aspects of things and believe that the worst will happen. They lack hope and confidence in the future. They see positive results a just flukes. Do you know anyone with these qualities? Which one are you?

Knowing the Difference

The negative thinker is often exhausted, depressed, moody, irritable, and easily frustrated. Little things increase their stress level. Some negative thinkers are prone to overeating as they use food to comfort them. Positive thinkers tend to be healthier, more successful, and happy and fulfilled.

What is your reaction when an unexpected event occurs? Do you focus on the negative ignoring the positive? Do you look for the imperfections? Are you jumping to conclusions or trying to read someone’s mind? Do you take things personally regardless if it’s one person’s opinion? Chances are you are a pessimist or negative thinker if you have said yes to these questions.

Your self-talk is that internal dialogue that runs through your head that continuously interprets, judging, analyzes, and explains situations. This self-talk has a tendency to make negative statements, judgments, and assumptions. Often what is believed can be completely off track and easily blown out of proportion. When you are stressed out, you cannot think rationally and make good decisions. Your thoughts and feelings impact your behaviors and actions. Negative thoughts lead to negative outcomes. Positive thoughts lead to positive outcomes.

In order to start getting the outcomes that you want, you need to shift your thinking to a more positive outlook. By doing so, you will decrease your stress level and you will be able to handle such a situation objectively and with ease. You can feel energized and hopeful for your future. Remember your thoughts are just thoughts they are not facts. 13038476_l

Let’s say you made a mistake. A pessimist is quick to look for fault or blame themselves for any shortcomings. They see situations as permanent and almost impossible to get out of. The optimist believes that they are responsible for their results and view as a mistake as a learning opportunity to move forward. They see setbacks as temporary and with this new knowledge they will advance further. Optimists are better at finding solutions to problems that arise.

A Choice

At one time or another, you may have caught yourself thinking negatively. Most people are able to shift their thinking to a more positive outlook without blanketing one situation as impacting the rest of their lives. Some people feel that their childhood upbringing is responsible for their outcomes of their adulthood. However, if you truly think about it, your youth could be considered as the age of less than 21 years. I’m not discounting that some people have led challenging lives with neglect, abandonment, anxiety, abuse, or depression. What I am saying is that: Each person has a choice each day to choose their thoughts and how they feel to direct their actions and behavior. This choice is power – the power to live a life that you choose to live.

What will you choose?

“Desires dictate our priorities, priorities shape our choices, and choices determine our actions.” – Dallin H. Oaks

Shift Your Thinking

What dialogue will are having right now about a situation or event? What emotions are coming up for you?

Ask yourself questions to challenge your thoughts because you could be wrong:

Is the thought that you’re having helpful or unhelpful?

What do you believe to be true?

Is there any evidence to disprove your thought?

What would you say to a friend or colleague in a similar situation?

What are the costs and benefits of you thinking in this way?

What other ways to look at this situation?

What thoughts do you wish to have instead?

What action(s)will you take to support your positive outlook?

Your thoughts are like magnets. If you are thinking positively, you will look for evidence that positively supports your belief. If you are thinking negatively, you will look for the negative that supports that belief. Start looking for the good – build on the small success. Every situation can be seen from a positive or negative perspective. You have the opportunity to make a choice that could change her life. How will you describe your story or your day?

You get what you focus on. – Anthony Robbins

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has the heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. She is a contributing writer for Diversity Magazine and Fabulous at 50 Magazine. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. www.debrakasowski.com

The Hidden Truth behind Not Good Enough and Good Enough

by Leave a Comment

Have you, a friend, or colleague ever made a proclamation “I am not good enough”? This self-sabotaging belief is a common roadblock or obstacle hindering a person’s success.

If you catch yourself saying this, I am guessing that you heard this message growing up or you are a perfectionist. Often, perfectionists fail to execute or take action because they believe they do not measure up – everything needs to be perfect.

Perfection paralyzes taking action. Striving for perfection can be exhausting. This belief of not being good enough is just a thought. What matters is the meaning and the power you give to the thought of “not being good enough” is where the problem lies.

You could create a long laundry list of areas that you are not good enough: you’re not slim enough, you’re not tall enough, your teeth not white enough, you’re not pretty or handsome enough to get the man or woman of your dreams or you’re not smart enough to get the promotion or land the big contract and the list goes on. What is good enough?

SONY DSC
SONY DSC

Not good enough… By whose definition? Whose terms?

“Being not good enough” is a harsh judgment you put on yourself. Would you place the same judgment on your family member or best friend? You are comparing yourself to people who are also comparing themselves to others. With each comparison, you those sight of what makes you unique and valuable. Their measurements for themselves are not the same as how you measure yourself. We do not all use the same yardstick.

You are good enough.

Focus on making progress not making perfect. Let go of perfection for it is an illusion. You may still attend to the details as long as you take action steps to move forward.

The person who sees themselves with humility knows that there may be someone better than they are or someone just beginning their journey. Good for them-they are on their journey and you and yours.

Use the phrase “not good enough” to fuel you becoming better than you were yesterday-skills and abilities can be developed.

Don’t let it stop you from taking action.

I’d rather work with someone who will put in the effort than someone who says that’s “good enough” to get by. You cannot be an Olympic athlete, real estate mogul, bestselling author, or top 100 best businesses to work for by just getting by.

Raise the bar. Just good enough is often not enough.

Give 100% of your best effort into all that you do on any given day.

Live, work, and play with no regrets.

Progress ignites belief in oneself to take more inspired action. The mindset of only putting enough effort to get by has poor results to show for it.

Do you want to just get by or do you want more for yourself?

By putting in your best effort into your work, relationships, and your life, you will achieve greater happiness and fulfillment.

The hidden truth is your personal best is enough. You more than enough – get started and adjust your course along the way. You are further ahead than those who have yet to get started.

You are enough now in this moment.

Now go out and start taking action!