Debra Kasowski

EPISODE 139 – The Art of Allowing NOT Resisting

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Have you ever look around your world only to be frustrated that things are not turning out how you wanted them to? Everything around you is a product of your choices. Poor choices result from negative thinking. People often take for granted how their thoughts and feelings impact their results. People tend to look at their current state instead of what is possible. Some people will look at the world with abundance and gratitude whereas others will look at the world from a place of scarcity and lack. You get more of what you are focused on so if you look at the world and you see abundance, there will always be more than enough. The more you are grateful for what you have the more you will have to be grateful for. The opposite is true. You can focus on the lack of and that you feel there is not enough and you will not be able to be satisfied as there will never be enough.

According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, the definition of allowing is “to permit or give consideration to” whereas, resistance is “an opposing of retarding force”. You can let things unfold once you have put in your efforts or you can force things to happen. When you force things to happen, it is like pushing a round peg into a square hole – the struggle becomes very real. You may become frustrated and give up when challenges come your way.

You get what you put into and expect in your life. If you are not expecting SUCCESS and events to go as you want, you will not get success and things will not go as planned. You are not ALLOWING opportunities and success to occur. You are putting up walls of resistance with your mind. Self-defeating thoughts are resistant thoughts. Negative thinking is problem focused, therefore, blocking any solutions from being available. When you are thinking positive you are open and receptive to new ideas and you are more likely to implement a new idea. To attract what you want in your life and business, you must be OPEN and RECEPTIVE. When people are in a place of lack and scarcity they are NOT OPEN, they resist allowing positive outcomes. They are focused on not having and not seeing the possibility for the future. This resistance can hold people back from what they really want.

A person who offers resistance is often close-minded and this prevents them from seizing new opportunities that come their way. A person who likes to be the devil’s advocate questioning and gaining different perspectives is doing so to seek information and not necessarily resisting. If you are a resistor, you tend to come up with excuses and reasons why you can’t do something. Your choices are based on fears and self-limiting beliefs. It is one thing to ask questions and learn more and another to come up with the rationale for why something is impossible. When you ask questions, you learn what is possible.

To receive, you need to start shifting your thoughts and feelings to positive ones in which you will feel when you receive it. Start anticipating your successes! When you prime your state of mind to be one of abundance and positivity, you will be more likely to take actions required to get the results you want. You will be open to exploring and seek abundance.

You have an opportunity to choose which thoughts you allow and which thoughts you reject. Those thoughts impact how you feel. The actions you take are impacted by your feelings and emotions. Your emotions are there to guide you. Align with how you wish to be and feel I the process.

Allowing is about being happy in the here and now! Allowing others to be who they are without you getting upset about it and letting it impact your happiness and desires. You cannot change other people you can only change your responses to them. Allow others to make their own choices as you are only responsible for your choices. You can educate and encourage but ultimately, they are in charge of themselves. Allow yourself to love others for who they are and not how you wish them to be. Meet them where they are at. You can plant the seed of what you see is possible for them. It has been my experience that people flourish when people see something in them that they cannot see.

Relieve yourself of the internal pressures and allow things to be as they need to be and trust the process and detach from outcomes. The more you relax and the less resistance you have the more you allow things to happen. When you push or force things to happen they do not happen.

To Allow –  knowing it is going to happen. Be OPEN and RECEPTIVE to the opportunities coming your way. Put in the work, plan for, and EXPECT success!

We would love to have you subscribe to the Success Secrets newsletter on my website at www.debrakasowski.com where you’re going to get my just release FREE e-book about the 21 Habits High Achievers Kick to Achieve Success. I would love to hear about this podcast has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Share it with Your Friends. Give us a 5-star rating!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free e-book download today! www.debrakasowski.com

EPISODE 129 – Give More and Receive More with Teresa Spinelli

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Meet Our Guest:

Teresa Spinelli wasn’t destined to lead her family’s grocery business. But life takes
many turns and the leader is what she became.

Born in Edmonton in 1961 Teresa grew up at the Italian Centre Shop, taking her first
steps in the pasta isle. By age 13 she was working in the store regularly as a cashier,
never dreaming she would one day ascend to the Presidency of the company. In 1983
after successfully graduating from the University of Alberta with a psychology degree
her plan was to pursue social work, though admittedly realized social work wasn’t for
her after completing a work term. “I realized I’d be a horrible social worker because I
wanted to take everybody home with me.”

Family misfortune changed the course of Teresa’s life with the loss of her brother,
followed by the passing of her father, Frank Spinelli three years later. “We were a
traditional Italian family, and I had a brother, so automatically, because he was the boy,
he was going to take the business.” In 2000 Teresa stepped in as the president of the
company temporarily; the company having 30 employees and a net worth of 9 million.
Teresa believed the Italian Centre had the potential to be bigger and better.
With her vision of changing the business from a local grocery store to a major importer
and distributor, within a year, she grew the business to 12 million in sales. Today, the
Company has grown 8 times with 4 stores (located in Edmonton and Calgary), 509
employees and sales of 64 million.

Married to Mike Newberry in 1999, and blessed with son Massimo in 2007 Teresa’s
business philosophy comes from her dad, “The more you give, the more you get.” Her
passion is revitalizing the McCauley community around Little Italy in Edmonton’s
downtown and volunteering with such organizations as the Italian Chamber of
Commerce; Mayor’s Task Force on Sustainable Communities, and Edmonton City
Manager’s Advisory Committee. For Teresa, it’s all about people and showing them you
love them with a hearty, bountiful meal.

“For me, it’s not about selling salami. For me, it’s about people. The reason I get up in
the morning is because I want to grow people.” – Teresa Spinelli

Among her notable awards for 10-years running, Teresa has been one of Canada’s Top
100 Women Entrepreneurs as ranked by Profit Magazine; the People’s Choice
Businesswoman of the Year; and has received the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee Medal in
recognition of contributions to Canada.

Episode 93 – Silence Your Inner Critic

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Each of us has an inner voice. Some people refer to it as the inner voice of knowing- but does it really know, especially when the negative thoughts rear their ugly heads. Isn’t bad enough you wonder what other people are saying about you or the efforts you put out? You don’t need any extra judgment as you already are your own worst critic. There are times you say things to yourself that you would not voice out loud and direct at anyone else. Why? The inner critic is not compassionate, kind, or respectful. If you wouldn’t say it to anyone else, why say such mean things to yourself. It’s not that you are wanting to get rid of the inner voice, you are managing the negative thoughts.

When you are in a negative state of mind, you will take actions to support your thoughts and feelings, ultimately, impacting the results you are getting. You need to stop the critic because it crushes your self-confidence to take essential actions required to achieve results. Think of your radio dial; you can tune into music and messaging that you choose to listen to. Many of the messages in your mind have been forged from the past and no longer serve the current situation. It may have come from criticism or advice. You may hear the voice of your mother or father commenting on something and you have hung onto to it. Now in the present something comes up and you think it must be true because someone else has said it even it does not even fit the current situation.

You want to be able to silence the inner critic, the chatter, you hear in your head. Managing the thoughts, you are having is not as difficult as you think. Your mind is flooded with over 50,000-70,000 thoughts in a day with many of them being negativity. Most of these thoughts are unconscious until you bring them into your awareness. As soon as you bring a thought into your awareness, you can make a conscious choice whether you want to keep the thought or reject it. Unfortunately, you may grab a single negative thought and play it in your head like a broken record. It does not serve you – it is time to manage your thoughts and toss those negative ones away altogether.

“If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month.”
― Theodore Roosevelt

It all begins with…self-awareness.

What thoughts are you thinking? Once you can notice your thoughts in the moment, now you can change them but before you do, why are you having them, to begin with? Is your self-confidence low? Is fear coming up? Even though negative thoughts come up and their many have been moments that you tell yourself, “I am stupid.”, you need to stop and remember there also have been a time you have shined and felt on top of the world. You are not stupid – your behavior or action you took was not the right one now.

When you catch yourself saying a negative thought, STOP and take notice of it. You can say, “Cancel, cancel, cancel”. Your thoughts are powerful. Your thoughts influence the actions you are going to take. If you are in a bad mood, you may react to a situation or say things you would later regret.

REFRAME the thought into a positive thought. Positive thoughts lead to positive actions. Positive actions will get you closer to the success you are looking for. The reason people do not achieve the success they are looking for is often because the get caught up in the stories they tell themselves.

Get into a positive state of mind. When I studied the morning routines of successful people, I learned that they put themselves into a positive state. To get yourself into a positive state, you can pray or meditate, exercise, write in a gratitude journal, or read a book that gets your mind primed for the day. The morning is not the only time you can do this. You can change your state by simply thinking of a time where you felt unstoppable and you felt at the peak of success.

Your inner voice is not a bad thing…it can warn you or alert you to doing your due diligence. It is a bad thing when you allow thoughts to take root and sabotage your efforts. You need to remind yourself that you have greatness within you – everyone does. Holding back on your greatness serves no one – if you hold back – it is a tragedy. Everything in life is interconnected. If you do not fulfill your purpose, others are impeded from fulfilling theirs.

Make a choice. Your imagination can run wild if you let it. Telling you stories of disempowerment. You need to harness your thoughts and empower yourself. You can break down your stories and examine the words that you use. The word “Can’t” places limits on what you believe is possible and what you think you are capable of doing. Yes, there are somethings that you can’t do such as swim without oxygen in the depth of the sea or fly above the mountains like an eagle. There are things you can do and you are stopping yourself from doing them.

Can’t is a choice. You are choosing not to. Do you notice when you have a choice you suddenly have empowered yourself and taken control of the actions you are taking? What CAN you do? Stephen King said, “you can, you should, and if you’re brave enough to start, you will.” Focus on what you can do versus what you cannot.

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t—you’re right.”
― Henry Ford

You have more power than you give yourself credit for. When you pay attention to what you are saying and how those words make you feel and the thoughts you are having, you can start taking actions that support your success rather than sabotage it.

Be Aware -Notice and Understand It.

Stop – Cancel the thought.

Reframe It.

Get into a positive state.

CHOOSE – what you are going to say and do that will empower you!

We would love to have you subscribed to the Success Secrets newsletter on my website at www.debrakasowski.com where you’re going to get us free MP3 download 10 Surefire Strategies to Power Up Your Productivity and Performance. I would love to hear about this podcast has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Share it with Your Friends. Give us a 5-star rating!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

 

 

 

 

Episode 86: Never Make Quitting Your Option

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Meet our Guest:

Bean was paralyzed in 2012, by an autoimmune disorder called Transverse Myelitis. She has over 10 years experience as an X-ray technologist specializing in the Cardiac Catheterization Lab. She is also a certified Makeup Artist who has worked on numerous fashion shows and photo shoots.

Since being diagnosed and achieving milestones that seemed impossible, Bean is determined to make her experience a positive one. To help others affected by disability and vowing to Never Give Up.

She is the cofounder & administrator of ReYu, a local (Edmonton) non-profit Paralysis Recovery Centre. Bean was one of the featured models with disabilities in Western Canada Fashion Week. This part of fashion week was the first ever of its kind in Canada. www.reyu.com

Episode 54: Say Yes to Your Success

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Meet our Guest:

Debra began transforming lives in the 1970’s when she studied at the feet of the greatest spiritual masters of the east — often in deep meditation for 10 to 12 hours a day and complete silence for weeks at a time – and then taught meditation to thousands around the world.

In the 1980’s Debra immersed herself in the knowledge of the Masters of western metaphysical thought and founded Yes to Success Seminars bringing then radical ideas like “your thoughts create your reality” into the mainstream.

Within a few short years, Debra’s seminars were being taught in cities across the US and in seven countries on four continents – before the days of the Internet. Debra appeared regularly in publications as well as on radio and TV.

As a sought-after trainer, her clients included McDonnell Douglas, Mattel Toys, and the Xerox Management Group—at a time when it was practically unheard of for women to be doing trainings in corporate America.

Using the knowledge they learned from Debra, her students went on to become mega-successful entrepreneurs, NY Times bestselling authors, millionaires, billionaires—even household names.

In 1988, at the height of her success, on the verge of launching her own national TV talk-show, Debra walked away from her career and disappeared from the public eye for over 20 years when she chose to follow a different passion—to be a stay-at-home mom.

Now a best-selling author, world-renowned speaker, and the co-founder of Your Year of Miracles mentoring program for women, with thousands of students from over 50 countries around the world, Debra has taken the idea of success and abundance to a whole new level as she now teaches how to create a life filled with miracles.

She is also the proud mom of two amazing young adult children.