Debra Kasowski

EPISODE 181 – Know Yourself Know Your Worth

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Over the years, I’ve interviewed thousands of people, most of them women, and I would say that the root of every dysfunction I’ve ever encountered, every problem, has been some sense of a lacking of self-value or of self-worth. – Oprah Winfrey

The results you are getting in your personal and professional life are a direct reflection of how you feel about yourself and treat yourself. The reality you have created is all around you. We all face challenges. Some people move through challenges better than others. The people who are most successful and happiest are the ones who know their worth and value themselves. You need to know your worth before anyone else is going to value it.

We have all had people and circumstances that have come into our lives at one time or another where we have felt wronged by – making ourselves a “victim”. Yet at the same time, we teach others how to treat us. Yes, the statement hurts. If you are not self-aware of the power and control you have, you cannot change anything.  When you realize you are responsible for the results and outcomes you create. You can make a choice to do things differently.

I have witnessed too many men and women who are letting other people and outside circumstances determine their worth. They change themselves for others until they no longer recognize themselves. They are criticizing themselves and making themselves lesser than others so other people will feel better about themselves. Dimming your light serves no one. It takes away permission from others to share themselves fully. They start to lessen themselves too. It is time for a change. It is time for you to take back your control and love yourself for what you bring to the table. Know your yourself, know your worth.

There is no room for you to play the victim game! No excuses. No complaining. No blaming others for your results. Take 100% responsibility for your life as it is right now. It is time for you to run your own race.

Your empowerment starts with knowing what to stop doing and start doing.

STOP DOING

Stop looking for someone to discover your self-worth.

Stop chasing a love that isn’t yours.

Stop settling for less than you deserve.

Stop putting yourself down for who you are, your mistakes, and failures.

Stop being afraid to speak up for what you believe in.

Stop making others a priority when they make you their option.

Stop comparing yourself to others.

Stop focusing on your weaknesses and what you don’t have.

Stop holding back from offering suggestions or sharing your ideas.

Stop looking to others to make decisions for you.

START DOING

Believe in yourself. You need to have confidence in what you do and the work you deliver.

BE yourself.

Don’t worry about what others will say or do.

Explore your potential to inspire yourself.

Acknowledge your strengths, talents, skills, and abilities. You will attract the right person and opportunity when you focus on your strengths.

Sharing your accomplishments. If your boss or client does not know what you are capable of, how would they know if you may be suited to an opportunity?

Speak impeccably about yourself and others.

Be Kind to Yourself.

Praise Yourself.

Trust yourself – you know more than you give yourself credit for.

Compare yourself to who you were yesterday and be a better version of yourself today.

Be gracious with yourself when things do not go as planned. Look for the lesson you need to take away from mistakes and failures.

Make yourself a priority – take care of your health, eat and sleep well, and keep hydrated.

Compliment yourself – if this means giving yourself a selfie high-five so be it!

Keep your standards, there is no reason to lower them.

Self-reflect on your days – asking yourself how you can improve.

Gather your facts, seek counsel from trusted sources, and make your own decisions.

Knowing yourself and knowing your worth add many bonuses to creating the life you desire. The best part of all is you have the freedom to be you! You can fully express yourself without the fear and worry of what others are thinking. You will be resistant to social pressure and say “no” to what you do not want to do and say “yes” to what you do want to do. You will have clarity, therefore, be a better decision maker. You will have more confidence to express your ideas and ask for what you want and go after it. Getting to know yourself is a lifelong journey as you get exposed to new life experiences you continue to get to know your likes, dislikes, wants, and needs. Knowing yourself and knowing your worth leads to happiness and joy!

“Today is the day to break free from the prison of the person you know yourself to be and step into a self you have yet to know. Will it be comfortable? No, but do it anyway.”

– Debbie Ford

Who do you know who needs to know their worth? Please share this post so others can get to know themselves and know they are worth whatever their heart desires.

Life goals and accomplishments spill over to our professional growth and accomplishments. Our character becomes more defined and our personality comes alive.

We would love to have you subscribe to the Success Secrets newsletter on my website at www.debrakasowski.com where you’re going to get my just release FREE e-book about the 21 Habits High Achievers Kick to Achieve Success. I would love to hear about this podcast has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Share it with Your Friends. Give us a 5-star rating!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has the heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free e-book download today! www.debrakasowski.com

 

EPISODE 24 – Know Your Worth

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Episode 24 – Know Your Worth

“I’ve learned that fear limits you and your vision. It serves as blinders to what may be just a few steps down the road for you. The journey is valuable, but believing in your talents, your abilities, and your self-worth can empower you to walk down an even brighter path. Transforming fear into freedom – how great is that?” Soledad O’Brien

48130021 - annoyed upset angry woman plugging her ears with fingers doesn't want to listen
48130021 – annoyed upset angry woman plugging her ears with fingers doesn’t want to listen

There are way too many people walking around in the world who do not know their worth. They have been hanging on to the message that says “I am not enough.” They may have heard it from their parents, peers, bosses, teachers, or colleagues that they weren’t measuring up but they didn’t have what it took to reach the next level. They may have even been told that their dreams were too big and that they shouldn’t stretch that far. When you listen to those messages or replay them in their mind over and over, you start to believe it the message. You become the story that you tell yourself. You integrate it into who you are. You become afraid to stretch out of your comfort zone and really step into the person that you’re meant to be.

I believe that one time or another we have all had instances where we felt that someone has put us in our place. Sometimes it doesn’t matter how much experience you have in a certain area, knowledge or expertise, there may be someone who doesn’t see what you bring to the table. I’ve had an experience like this personally. When I learned that the person did not see my value, I looked inside myself to see how I may be reflecting that and in a conversation with this person I shared my value because I believe in my capabilities and I also know that I can step into any situation learn and grow as long as I’ve learned to work with my people. Processes can be learned and taught in relationships with people have to be built and nurtured over time. We teach people how to treat us and this is why it was so important for me to express myself when I saw someone didn’t see the worth I saw it myself. Don’t let others define your worth. Ask for feedback on how you need to show up and put the effort in. At the end of the day, I am glad that circumstance didn’t turn out the way I originally hoped because other opportunities were standing bright in my future. Sometimes you have to say no to good in order to experience great.

Recognize Your Strengths

You need to take the time to recognize what your strengths are to help understand your worth. It is about knowing your value and what you bring forth to the world and your leadership style. Do not dwell on your weaknesses, focus on your strengths.  It doesn’t matter whether you’re leading your household, community group, an organization, or running a business. If you don’t understand what you bring that increases the value you will not make an impact. What do you do that adds to your competitive advantage? What you offer that others do not? What makes you stand out from the crowd?

If you’re struggling to come up with your strengths, you may want to ask others around you to discover which are known for- your signature. What is it when a project or situation comes up the first person they think of is you?

Create Goals That Challenge You

When you create goals that challenge and stretch you, you realize that you are more than good enough. You are capable of so much more than you often give yourself credit for. When you are fearful or intimidated from trying new things or taking on challenges you are less likely to take any action. Yes, there will be a learning curve. Yes, it will be a challenge. These challenges are meant to help you learn and grow and become stronger and more resilient. The best way to face the challenge is to increase your efforts. The more inspired your action the greater results you will achieve. Those who are most resilient are people who see their current situation or setback as temporary and not a permanent state. They know that if they take action that their circumstance can change. If they do nothing, nothing changes.

Value Your Work

TMW_PDFclickhere.fwLou Tice stated,” No matter what you say you want to achieve or become – you aren’t going to do it unless you first believe you deserve it and can cause it to happen.” You need to believe that you deliver value and you deserve a positive outcome whether the monetary or in the form of relationship building. It doesn’t matter if you are putting together a proposal, asking for a raise, or deciding to charge what you’re worth for your product or service, you need to believe you are worth it and know your value. Arm yourself with facts. Keep track of your achievements and contributions and their impact no matter how big or small. Not only are these good for negotiating, they are also important for you to review when you may have a bad day. They act as reminders to let you know how far you’ve come.

You are not the same person from one year ago, three years ago, or five years ago. You have evolved into the person you are now and with that come knowledge, talents, skills, and abilities along with much experience. There is no one like you. Don’t sell yourself short. Demonstrate how you have exceeded expectations and why you are deserving of what you wish to achieve. When you believe it and speak with conviction, others will believe it too. Step into your power.

I would love to hear about how knowing your worth – knowing your value has changed the way you show up in life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Give us a 5-star rating! Sign up for our Newsletter www.debrakasowski.com

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Time: 10:49 min

 

Keywords: Self-esteem, self-worth, self-efficacy, believe in yourself, asking for a raise, making a proposal, set goals, goal setting, challenge yourself, resilience, resiliency, leadership, leader, define your worth, not good enough, achieve, achievement

 

Building Confidence

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Are there times that you wish you felt more confident when you walk a room? If you look around that room, do you think everyone is 100% all the time? Tell you what, everybody lacks confidence in one area in their life or another, especially when they are trying out new things. Instead of worrying about that someone is so much better than you and comparing yourself. Look at the areas in your life that you are confident in, you feel completely in control in. You already ARE and HAVE confidence in many areas of your life…maybe just not in the area you are hoping to right now.

Do you want to know the biggest secret?

“You increase your confidence every time you take action toward your goal that you are trying to reach. ” – Debra Kasowski

As you get practice, you might make mistakes, fall down, you get up, and you keep perserving – you reflect, and learn whatever lessons that that brought you. I guarantee you soon enough, you will also have confidence in those areas too. Then you will have a new area you will have to practice.

Get up and know that you have confidence in other areas of your life right now. You might just need to learn more lessons right now to make you more confident where you are right now and where you are heading.

 

 

Sometimes You Just Need to Put the Blinders On

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This post seems so appropriate since Rodeo Week is just around the corner. In a recent a late night phone conversation with a friend of mine,  I was asking her if she checked out some of the things that others were doing in her industry. She mentioned she did not. I am quite a curious cat so I asked “Why?” “Well” she said, ” If I look at what others are doing, I may have the tendency to compare what they are doing to what I am doing.” How many of you can relate? Sometimes this comparison can downright pull you down if you are coming from a place of “She is so much better than me.” or “I do not have what she has.: or even “She’s been a this longer than I have.”  I have also noticed that sometimes people can start copying the person they are comparing themselves to without even realizing it. Whoa there! 

 

First of all, if you are looking at the others in the industry, look for what appeals to you and what seems to be working for them. Huge warning…you do not want to adopt or align with beliefs or ideas that do not resonate with you. Be YOU! People want to work with people who are true to who they are. Secondly, you are already enough and you have what it takes. Do not downplay what you have accomplished. You need to do it your way! People are attracted to doing business and forming relationships with others based on synergy and a feeling of connection. Thirdly, do not forget – you are brilliant and you have tons of ideas that need to be put into action. You may feel uncomfortable when you put the ideas into action. I even get nervous when I am trying new things. No I am not kidding depending on what it is. It is a mix of nervousness and excitement and then a sense of, “I can do this. I have stretched before and I can do it again.” The results I have gotten better and better every time. As my motto goes, “Do not let your greatest regret in life be that you never took action.”

Be strategic. Learn from others but remember to value the talents and skills you bring forth. After all, there is only one you and no one can do things your way!

Put your blinders on. Focus on how your ideas are going to make a difference in the world and say, “Giddy Up! I am on the track. I am going to win this one!”