Photo Credit: Cherise Arcand

Endless possibilities begin with self-discovery.

Self-discovery is a process of deepening your understanding of yourself through self-reflection, exploration, and learning and growth. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Insist on yourself; never imitate.” Each of us has unique gifts to share with the world.

Have you ever been in a cycle of comparing yourself to others? It is human nature to compare yourself to others as a barometer of how you are showing up in the world. In fact, you may have experienced it with your parents or a teacher expressing, “Why aren’t you more like…?” Why? Because you are not! You are on your own journey just as they are on theirs. What you are good at may not be what another person is good at. We were not all meant to be the same. If you attempt to imitate someone, you can lose your own identity. This is why you must insist on being your authentic self!

Research shows that social media can be problematic as it can lead to social comparison that can be linked to negative psychological outcomes such as low self-esteem and depression. Ralph Waldo Emerson stated, “envy is ignorance, imitation is suicide.” When you start comparing yourself to others, you lose sight of your own uniqueness, talents, and gifts that are part of your own greatness. Jealousy is a call for action as it suggests that you want for yourself what another has. Envy is not healthy as it can be an obsession over wanting to be, do, or have what another has. Every time you imitate another person. you lose a piece of yourself and eventually, you may no longer know yourself to be you. It is important to acknowledge when you see social media posts of others that you are observing moments of time and not someone’s entire life journey.

Self-Reflection In a world where individuals can be quick to offer their opinions, you need to be able to use discernment. If you attempt to navigate your path based on other’s opinions, you can get to a point where you feel you have lost your way. One day, one person offers you one opinion. The next day someone else may offer theirs, and it can feel like there is a moving target. You may feel that you are getting caught up in societal expectations versus what may be best for you.

Self-reflection is truly about learning about yourself – your wants and desires, your likes, and dislikes, your strengths and weaknesses. who you are as a person, and what you want to be, do, or have. Discover what is working for you and what is not working for you. You may need to change patterns, habits, or routines. Journalling is one tool I recommend to my clients to help them to reflect and understand themselves better.

Exploration Nobody knows what your gifts are until you share them. You only know what you currently know. The more you expose yourself to new situations and experiences, the more you learn about yourself. Exploration requires that you step out of your comfort zone to try new things. How do you know what you like or dislike if you have never tried it? You might take a solo trip or go for dinner by yourself. You might take a pottery or painting class or even learn a new language. You might take a singing lesson or take on a leadership position. How do you know what you are capable of until you put yourself in the position to find out? People often underestimate themselves more than they over-estimate themselves.

Learning and Growth As you explore your opportunities, you will make mistakes along the way. Some people will see it as a failure. Failure is necessary for success. There are no true failures when you learn and grow from your experiences and circle back to discovering more about yourself and what to do and not to do. There is a richness of knowledge you can take away.

You can support your learning and growth in many ways: volunteering, reading books and industry articles, listening to podcasts or audiobooks, taking courses or workshops, attending conferences, networking with others, or participating in fitness or other group activities.

Your path is your path. Take time to reflect on what you want for yourself. Listen to other people’s opinions with discernment, curiosity, and caution. Explore what you are capable of, you may surprise yourself! Commit to continuous learning and keep a growth mindset.

Above all, insist on yourself! It takes courage to be who you are! You are braver than you think! Discover the best version of you!