Debra Kasowski

3 Powerful Strategies for Getting Accountability Right

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Finger-pointing and the “blame game” are not attributes of an individual who is accountable. They fail to remember that as their finger is pointing outward there are three fingers pointing back at them. The waving finger is often loaded with excuses or reasons why something didn’t work. It is time to disarm the excuses and reasons and to help individuals step into their accountability.

According to the Merriam-Webster online dictionary, accountability is “the quality or state of being accountable. especially an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions.” You may find people use the words accountability and responsibility interchangeably. There is a difference: responsibility is task-oriented whereas accountability has more to do with answerability for one’s behavior or actions. For example, when individuals on a team are each given a task toward a project, each person is responsible for their task of contribution. Now at the deadline of a project, everyone is accountable for the task they were assigned to. They must answer whether they have completed their task.

 There are also times when individuals misunderstand that they’re being held accountable versus being micromanaged. Accountability revolves around meeting expectations whereas micromanagement tends to be a hovering over or meddling in one’s role by taking over tasks. It is important to ensure that your team understands what accountability is and what taking ownership of their own behaviors and actions means. The best way to do this is to involve individuals or your team in creating a plan of accountability.

The late Stephen Covey said, “Accountability breeds response-ability.” You can respond to a situation instead of reacting to it. It starts with acknowledging what is and then owning or taking responsibility for the same. When someone takes responsibility for a situation, they have the ability course correct or come up with a solution.

“Accountability is the glue that ties commitment to the result.”

Bob Proctor

Get the Perspective of Others To make accountability right, you need to let go of the need to be right. The need to be right can prevent you from getting clarity about the situation.  Each person looks at a situation from their own vantage point. This is why several individuals witnessing a car accident will all have a different narrative of what happened. Some people will zoom into a situation and see all the details whereas others will zoom out to see the bigger picture. All perspectives have value. By being curious and taking the time to listen to the perspective of others, you can establish a better understanding of the situation at hand. The other perspectives create a visual –  setting the stage and helping you understand what is happening in the situation. When you take time to gather this information from others, you also demonstrate that you value and appreciate their insight.

Ask for Feedback from Others   It can take courage for you to ask for the feedback that you need. Many people believe feedback is something that they receive when they need to correct a behavior or action because something went wrong. Asking for feedback from others can be a game changer in bringing a different perspective to how you do your work or how you are showing up. Is it aligned with who you want to be and how you want to show up? You receive feedback from the world around us all the time through our results, experiences, and how we feel about how situations went. It is important the test our reality and perceptions and to challenge our assumptions. Receiving feedback that is constructive is valuable in building your character and demonstrating that you are open to continuous growth.

Collaboration over Competition   Success is not a one-man or woman show. When you collaborate with others you can often come up with more creative and innovative solutions. Sometimes people are afraid to collaborate because they’re focused on competing with one another versus leveraging the opportunity to pull the right skill sets and minds into the right space at the right time. Brainstorming and creative solution finding comes from tapping into the rich resource of the knowledgeable people around you.

When you engage others and create accountability, individuals get invested in seeing the results. People like to contribute by offering ideas and solutions and knowing that they’re contributing that makes a difference. Let’s get accountable and get it right! Fingers down!

What Leadership Legacy Do You Want to Leave?

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Sometimes it takes a thought-provoking question to make us stop and reflect on what we want. One question I love and enjoy asking leaders of all stages of their leadership journey, whether they have been in a leadership role for a long time or are evolving in their leadership, is “What legacy do you want to leave as a leader?”

The leader often pauses and says, “That’s a great question. I do not think I have stopped to think about this.” I reassure them that this response is quite normal.

Leaders have been focused on achieving results, performance, and productivity. Achieving results is what many leaders get promoted for not usually the leaders they develop within the organization.

Imagine if leaders started their careers thinking about the legacy they would like to be remembered for. Leaders are acquired for their knowledge, talents, skills, and abilities with a history of achieving results. Do we think that future leaders are developed through osmosis or solely based on observation? No, not likely.

As leaders reflect on this question, I often see a concentrated look turn into a big white wide smile as they describe the difference they want to make in the lives of the people they serve and the mark they want to leave in the organization. They start speaking passionately about building capacity, innovation, and creativity in overcoming perceived, potential, and real barriers standing in their way on the road to success. They talk about a collective and collaborative approach to achieving results while leveraging each other’s strengths. I cannot help but smile back as I get caught up in their enthusiasm for their leadership legacy.

If you are reading this and thinking to yourself, “I don’t know what legacy I want to leave as a leader.”

Consider the following questions:

What values are most important to me?

What qualities and characteristics do I want to role model?

In what ways, would I prepare a future leader while leveraging their unique gifts?

What stories and lessons do I want to impart to others to save them time, money, or resources?

Using my gifts, what difference would I like to make in the world?

As a leader and a coach, I feel a sense of obligation to ensure that people not only share their unique gifts; I want to ensure they do not hold themselves back from stepping into their potential and making the difference they have been called to make. I believe it is a privilege to be a leader, I have the opportunity to walk in front and walk from behind. Most of the time, I am walking alongside the people I lead. We learn from each other. We learn by doing and reflecting. We create a safe space to open up conversations and brainstorm ideas. Together we achieve results.

The most important aspect of defining your leadership legacy is knowing that as a leader YOU matter. Your legacy matters. It will live on for generations to come in the leaders you lead and those who lead after them in the stories, lessons, and the impact you make.

Stop, pause, and take a moment to think about the leadership legacy you want to leave. Where is your focus, attention, and intention to achieve this outcome?

3 Ways to Prime Your Day for Success

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Beginning your day with intention can help you make fewer decisions and save your energy for when it’s most important. Studies have shown that having structure and routine benefits children, but adults can also benefit from having routines to thrive.

How to get started

Preparation

“There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure.”

– Colin Powell

Preparing for your day begins the night before. Your mornings can be disrupted if you can’t locate your car keys, or if you’re unsure of what to wear. You may also discover that you don’t have enough gas in your car to reach your destination.

Before you start your day, it’s important to plan ahead. Check your calendar to see what you have planned and consider what you’ll need for each activity. Set your alarm for the appropriate time and set a backup, just in case you hit snooze. If you plan on going to the gym, pack your gym bag with everything you need and lay out your clothes for the next day. Make sure to pack a healthy lunch and ensure your car has enough gas to get you where you need to go. By preparing ahead of time, you can start your day feeling confident and ready to tackle anything that comes your way.

What’s Next?

Master Your Morning

Sometimes it can be overwhelming to see what lies in the day before you. Priming is a way to get into a state of mind that prepares you to take on the day in a more positive way. We have 50,000 to 70, 000 thoughts in a day with the majority of them being negative. Why not create the shift to focus on positive outcomes from the start?

“Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.”

Lao Tzu

Starting your day can vary greatly depending on personal preference and there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Numerous personal development experts have shared various methods such as journaling, meditation or prayer, exercise or fitness, silence, reading, and visualization, all of which have their own benefits. It’s common to experience some resistance when setting up your morning routine, as your brain likes to keep you safe and may be fearful of change. Don’t hesitate to experiment with different methods to find what works best for you. I recommend waking up at least 1-2 hours before you need to start your day’s activities.

Then What?

Focus and Reflect

“Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun’s rays do not burn until brought to a focus.”

– Alexander Graham Bell

Starting your day on purpose begins with intention, breathing through the tough parts, and critically thinking through scenarios as they arise. Focus on how you want to feel – it is easy to get caught up in analyzing situations. Stay curious at all times. Individuals who have established routines are disciplined and have built resilience.

Dealing with inconvenience in life is a true test of character. It’s important to keep the promises you make to yourself and learn from your experiences. Take some time to reflect during the day and at the end of the day by asking yourself these questions:

How would I rate my day on a scale of 0 to 10? What can I do to improve it? How can I set myself up for success tomorrow?

What were the positive outcomes of today? How can I replicate or surpass them tomorrow?

Which part of my morning routine energizes me the most? What can I add to it tomorrow?

Get ready for a successful day tomorrow by preparing and taking control of your day. Embrace your success by starting off on the right foot.

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC PCC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up for the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free 10-page PDF of Reset Your Mindset download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Count Your Blessings

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More blessings to count than the number of things we own. A simple acknowledgment and a grateful heart can change your life.

Sitting at the table reciting a prayer of thanks, you could sense the excitement amongst the family for the starting flag to be waved and notifying everyone it is time to dig in. It is interrupted by the request to go around the room one by one sharing what each person is grateful for. The list starts with family, good health, a great school year, and food…can we dig in now?

Thanksgiving in Canada is the second Monday in October and in the United States it is the fourth Thursday in November. It is recognized as a day to give thanks for all we have. You don’t have to wait for the one day of the year to come around to practice being grateful. Being grateful for the abundance in your life can be a daily practice and set the tone for your day.

Write down 3 things you are grateful for daily.

In a YouTube Video posted by the Greater Good Science Center called “The Power of Gratitude”, Dr. Robert Emmons, Professor of Psychology at UC Davis, explains how gratitude has the ability to heal, energize, and change our lives. It can help heal past hurts and give hope and inspiration for the future. Gratitude has the power to shift the focus of your mind to what you currently have and not on what you are lacking.

Focus on what you currently have.

Gratitude can ignite awareness. In John Kralik’s book, 365 Thank Yous: The Year a Simple Act of Daily Gratitude Changed My Life, he shares a story of his first written thank you note to his son. He was thanking his son for his Christmas present of single-cup coffeemaker. In writing out specifically what he was grateful for he came to the realization of how he had closed himself off from his son and how little he knew about his life. He knew that his relationship with his son needed to change, and he took intentional action moving forward. Kralik states “I will say that writing thank-you notes is a good thing to do and it makes me a better man. More than success or material achievement, this is what I sought.”

Be specific about what you are grateful for and how it has made your life better.

Gratitude can transform relationships and build people up to the way you see them and not necessarily how they see themselves. After all, we can be our own worst critics. Dr. Martin Seligman, author of Authentic Happiness: Using the New Positive Psychology to Realize Your Potential for Lasting Fulfillment, talks about how one of his students suggested having a “Gratitude Night” where a part of the class brought a guest who had never properly been thanked a wine and cheese function. The guest did not know the purpose of the gathering until each student took time to specifically thank the guest, they had brought to the function with a one-page testimonial. Guess what happened? Givers, receivers, and bystanders were all crying – they were touched by humanity. Seligman suggests that the reader select someone in their lives to thank by writing up a testimonial and having a face-to-face eye-to-eye sharing of what that individual has brought to their lives. If you take up the challenge, take time to reminisce about specific events – what did you notice about how this person showed up? How did you feel around them? How did that event impact you?

It is never too late to thank someone; it could change their lives and most importantly yours.

We tend to live our lives like we are going to live forever yet we all know that our forever is a variable. You may be waiting for the right time to thank someone, or you wished you could thank someone for the impact they had on you. Waiting is a fleeting game. As the saying goes, “There is no time like the present.”

“The things we do when we expect our lives to continue are naturally and properly different than the things we might do if we expected them to end abruptly.”

– Daniel Gilbert, Stumbling on Happiness

As you head to your Thanksgiving festivities, take time to reflect on the richness in your life, count your blessings, and focus on those who have impacted your life and deserve your thanks.

By Debra Kasowski – a speaker, writer, and author who is passionate about gratitude, happiness, and helping others live meaningful and fulfilling lives.

5 Reasons You Struggle to Achieve Your Goals

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Sitting at the table you drop your pen, crumple up a piece of paper, and toss it for a 3-point shot into the wastepaper basket. You were attempting to write down a goal that you would like to achieve in the next 6 months. Your inner critic piped up saying, “You have attempted this goal before. What makes you think you can achieve it this time?”

It’s true. You may have attempted the goal 2-3 times and not succeeded. It doesn’t mean you should give up.

Photo Credit melpomen

Achieving your goals can be overwhelming when you have competing demands that require your attention. You may feel you are in a mental tug-of-war with other goals that are equally as important to you. Having a split focus does not help you achieve either one or you may abandon them altogether.

It is time to dig deeper into the “why” of your struggle.

You are casting your net too wide. Your goals are too broad and there is no way to measure them. You may even have several goals tangled up in one. You need to tease them out to pick one specific goal – choose the one goal that if you achieve it will help achieve some of the smaller goals. Use the S.M.A.R.T. goal method where goals are specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and timely.

You lack the willpower to make necessary changes. The goals you set are things you have not yet achieved or conquered. To achieve your goals, you will have to potentially do things that you have never done before. You will have to make a change to your regular routine or discipline yourself. Change makes people uncomfortable. Change is growth; it is progress. You will have to ask yourself the ultimate question – Am I willing to make the changes necessary to achieve my goals?

You are not setting the “REAL” goal. You may not be setting goals that stretch you and promote the growth of your knowledge, skills, or experiences. You are playing it safe. Fear has crept in and you have decided to play small. Set a goal that is meaningful to you and that you are emotionally connected to. This goal will help you stay motivated and drive you toward achieving it when challenges or obstacles arise. You may have heard of this type of goal being called the “BHAG – Big Hairy Audacious Goal”. Go for it!

You lack belief in yourself. You cannot visualize seeing yourself achieve your goals. You find ways to self-sabotage your progress by missing deadlines, avoiding putting in the effort, or failing to contribute to a conversation. Sabotage usually surfaces when you do not believe you are “enough”, “worthy”, or “deserving”. Take time to understand where those beliefs came from – chances are they are a narrative from the past and that is not who you are today. Stop comparing yourself to your yesterday.

You do not ink the goals you think about. You have many thoughts in a day. 50, 000 – 70, 000 to be exact. These thoughts can be fleeting and unless you capture your goals on paper they can disappear into thin air. Inking out your goals makes your goals tangible and gives them substance in which you can build your plan of action and timelines.

Your goals do not have to be only things you long for. You can end the struggle by developing clarity of your most important goal. You can commit to the change or changes required to achieve your goal. You can go for the real goal that makes you anticipate life’s upcoming events. You can believe you are enough, worthy, and deserving of your desired outcomes. Why? Because your goals mean something to you and that is all that matters. You can start inking your goals and reviewing them a few times a day to keep them top of mind.

Wouldn’t it feel great to stand in a victory pose and say, “I did it!”