I was walking briskly by the magazine rack at the gym and one of the headlines on a magazine caught my eye. The title read, “Lose weight without trying.” I began to wonder how was that done. A magic pill, the cure all for cellulite. Perhaps, positive thinking will melt away the pounds of Christmas sweets and baking. I am afraid not. I did not open the magazine to read the article but it got me thinking. Can you achieve your goals without trying too?

Goal setting is an exercise of your mind. You must get clear on what it is you want so you can start moving toward achieving it. Keeping track of your goals in your mind is not very effective. You must write them down, hence the phrase, “Think it and ink it.” By doing this, you make your goals more tangible and real. You also bring your goals to a greater awareness; they are not something you tuck in the back of your mind and only retrieve when the time feels right. If you want something bad enough, the time should be right now. If not, when?

Goals have parameters that need to be considered when writing them out. You need to be specific with what it is you wish to achieve. Maybe you do want to lose weight. If so, much? Once you are sure on what it is you want to achieve, what will demonstrate to you that you have achieved it? For weight loss, it could be the scale, how you feel in your clothes, or the measurements you read as you use a tape measure on different circumferences of your body.

You need to be able to measure your results. In what time frame do you wish to achieve your goal? Now with that being said, goal setting is specific to individuals. Your goal is set and completed by you, no one else can achieve your goal for you as it is your vision for vision for yourself. You have to be invested in yourself. Are the goals you have set achieveable and realistic for you and the time frame you set to accomplish ? Setting a goal to lose 20 pounds in one week is not realistic nor healthy for you. Do you see what I mean? How does someone achieve a goal without trying?

A person needs to take action steps to create a momentum toward achieving their goals. Goal setting is the “magic pill” of achievement. Consistent action and cultivation of healthy goal setting or habits will take a lot further than “without trying”. As Dr. Phil would say, “How is that working for you?”

I have been listening to an audio book entitled “The Likeability Factor” by Tim Sanders. This is an excellent content rich book about what characteristics make people more likeable and how these qualities make them more successful. Sanders states that a person’s “L” factor or “likeability factor” has to do with four key concepts.

3. Relevance. How does another person connect to your life? Find out what another person’s passions are; this can include their hobbies or interests and remember to also share your passions with them. He recommends that we seek to understand how the person we have met has significance in in our own lives. When someone fulifills our needs they have satisfied a “sweet spot”, therefore they become more relevant to us. We can also seek what significance we have to the other person in return.

4. Empathy. Ask about another person’s feelings or think about what you would feel like if you were in their situation. Form an emotional connection and show that you really care. By being empathetic versus simply sympathetic makes you become more likeable. He uses the movie “Groundhog Day” as an example of how a character who insults others can learn how to become empathetic and thus more likeable.

People who are likeable get better treatment and also get their needs met. Sanders elaborates on how the reader can become more likeable with fabulous tips and techniques. Great book for all areas of your life!

One exercise that I enjoyed was…

Think about the qualities that you most often get complemented on. These are some of the “likeability” qualities that people receive from you. Often the qualities you like in others are qualities you also possess. Insightful!

This is definitely a book you need to read or listen to more than once. Better yet add it to your library collection. There is so much great content to apply to your life right now.

Be Likeable from the Inside and Out!

Debra