The words we use to communicate carry so much power. There are some words that we just need to drop from our vocabulary for they carry nothing but a negative context.
I was speaking with a business owner whose focus was in real estate who needed someone to provide interior design and decor. I referred someone who is very professional and I respect. As you can appreciate, when you provide a referral you are providing someone that you know, like, and trust and who will do a good work. Right before their meeting, the business owner called me to let me know that they were about to meet. I wished them well and I had asked that this business owner treat my referral well. The business owner’s response was, “I will try.” To which my response was, “There is no try in how you treat people. You either choose to treat someone well or you choose not to.” The business owner became flustered and stated “What do you mean? I replied that how you treat someone is a choice.
“Do or do not do. There is no try.” Star Wars character Yoda
Yoda’s philosophy applies to all opportunities that are presented to you. You cannot just sit on the fence or put in partial effort. You’re either in or you’re out. Your results are in direct proportion to whether you’re willing to make a commitment to choose to do something versus not doing something.
By reflecting on this conversation, I have made it my mission to help you, my reader, eliminate the word “try” from your vocabulary. Try is a destructive word for two main reasons: (1) it’s a cop-out or way to get you off the hook; you really don’t have to put the effort and (2) it points to self-doubt – doubt and fear that you are able to turn out the results you have been asked to deliver or hope to deliver. There is no real firm commitment to say, “Yes, I can do this!”
There is a distinct difference between “trying” and “doing”. I had read a story in which Tony Robbins was speaking to a woman in one of his audiences about her marriage. She told him that she had tried everything to save their marriage and that her husband had done nothing. So in hearing this, Tony Robbins had asked her to try to pick up a chair. The woman obliged and picked up the chair. He stated that he told her to “try to pick up the chair”. The woman was confused; she did not understand. He went on to explain that if you tried to pick up the chair you would not actually pick it up because you are making an attempt you weren’t doing. If I said pick up the chair to you, you could physically pick up the chair but if I ask you to try you will not succeed.
Really listen to the power of the word “try” and how it sabotages your efforts-it all starts in your mind. It’s time to shift to making a commitment. 100% all in where failure is not an option.
The words or phrases you should be using instead include:
I will…
I can…
Let’s get to it…
Can you hear the difference in the power of those phrases? How much stronger is your belief in yourself? How much more will you be able to accomplish or achieve?
Be aware of the words that you use. Make a commitment to yourself and to others when you say you will do things. Give it your best! Remember when you offer a referral you were hoping that they will treat your referral with the same respect and appreciation as the relationship they have formed with you.
What are some words you have eliminated from your vocabulary?
Please share this article with others who need to eliminate the word TRY!
DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. She is a contributing writer for Diversity Magazine and Fabulous at 50 magazine. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. www.debrakasowski.com
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