setting boundaries Archives - Page 2 of 2

Subscribe: RSS

When a person travels their view of the world expands. This past weekend I watched the movie “Sully” where Tom Hanks played the lead pilot. It was about the “Miracle on the Hudson” where a plane lands in the river versus heading back to it nearby airport runway.

44088939 - moscow - may 28, 2011: air hostess yulia of aeroflot shows how to use an oxygen mask on board. aeroflot operates the youngest fleet in the world among major airlines, numbering 150 airliners.

As I was watching the movie, I was reminded by the safety messages that many of us take for granted at the beginning of the flight. It is routine; however, these checklists are important in ensuring our safety. These routine checklists remind us that we need to put our own oxygen masks on first. We need to look after ourselves before we can serve others.

Are you looking after yourself first? It is so easy to over commit and put others’ needs above our own but at the end of the day who truly suffers? Who you want to show up as in the world? What do your actions say about who you are?

Helping yourself shows up in many ways.

1) Take 100% responsibility for your contribution in making a difference in the world around you.

All too often in businesses and in organizations people tend to think that someone owes them. They believe that others are responsible for the delivery of what they would want to happen. Businesses and organizations are only one piece of the puzzle. When you cast blame or complain than another person or group of people owes you, you give away your power. This power is yours. You have the ability to make a difference by contributing in your own way. Your contribution may be as simple as having a one-on-one conversation or more complex like creating a movement through social media.

How are you promoting your business, your organization, or even your profession? Why do others want to join you?

As my colleague, multi- Emmy Award Winner and Nobel Peace Prize nominee, Dr. Shawne Duperon, would say, “What are you broadcasting?”

2) Examine your habits.

35166340_s What habits are helping you move forward? What habits are holding you back?

Get at least eight hours of sleep a night.

Exercise 30 to 60 min. a day.

Eat healthy foods.

Drink at least 6 to 8 glasses of water a day.

Prepare in advance for your meetings.

Commit to reading 20 min. a day.

Plan out your week in advance with the flexibility to adjust where is needed.

Reward yourself for meeting your goals.

Follow-up with new prospects within 24 hours of meeting them.

Review your profit and losses weekly.

Balance your check book and review bank statements.

Avoid eating out too frequently.

All of these activities are ways in which you are helping yourself.

3) Learn To Say “No” To Others So You Can Take Care Of Yourself

It is way too easy to dismiss the commitment that we had with ourselves to go to the gym or spend time cleaning up the clutter in order to help another person. Over time you may see results from when you didn’t take care of yourself. These can show up in forms of being overweight, exhausted, illness, or even anxiety because you couldn’t find what you needed to.

Setting boundaries and understanding what you will tolerate and not tolerate is important. You must clearly communicate your wants and needs to others. If you spend more time pleasing others, you will neglect your own wants and needs. You may get frustrated or irritated.

By saying “no” to others, you are actually saying “yes” to yourself! By taking care of yourself first, you will then be replenished so that you can serve others in the way that you want and are able to do. Ensure that you’re taking time to reward yourself for your accomplishments and acknowledge how far you’ve come.

4) Invest in Your Personal Growth

Taking time and money to invest in yourself leads to an unlimited return on investment. You may advance academically or work with a personal trainer. Maybe you decided to learn from a Yogi in India or take a watercolours class. No matter what you choose to do in the process you learn more about yourself and how you interact in the world. You may get a job promotion, develop meaningful relationships, or become a famous artist. A world of possibilities opens up when you invest in yourself. Personal investment equals to personal fulfillment.

5) Allow for Another Person’s Growth

As someone who enjoys helping others, I sometimes forget that if I jump in and do for someone they are unable to learn and grow. You can’t help people by doing everything for people. Let them take responsibility for their actions and also learn from consequences – unless they are in danger of course. Instead, ask questions and be there for support when and as needed. Many learn from taking action and adjusting their course as they move forward.

By helping yourself first, you will be better able to help others when your needs are met first. Remember to put your oxygen mask on first. Live on purpose!

We would love to have you subscribed to the Success Secrets newsletter on my website at www.debrakasowski.com where you’re going to get us free MP3 download 10 Surefire Strategies to Power Up Your Productivity and Performance. I would love to hear about this podcast has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Share it with Your Friends. Give us a 5-star rating!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Time: 08:10 min

Keywords: help yourself first, setting boundaries, return on investment, invest in yourself, oxygen complex, put yourself first, help yourself before you help others, love yourself, start putting yourself first, put your oxygen on first, putting yourself first is not selfish, learn to say no

Sometimes the term “boundary” receives a negative connotation due to a meaning a limit and restriction. Boundaries are necessary in business in order to be more effective and productive with their time, money, and resources. Business owners often think that potential and current customers will be read held by a company or organization that has boundaries; however, this is not true.

“Time is the most valuable coin in your life. You and you alone will determine how that coin will be spent. Be careful that you do not let other people spend it for you.”
― Carl Sandburg

Here are three ways that you can get started by establishing boundaries in your business:

Set office hours. An open door policy is great but it can also take up a lot of time when conversations are more social rather than about business. Connecting with people is important however consider having a time limit on the social aspect and focus on the business at hand. For anyone working from home, boundaries are important because many people who see you working at home think that you are either not working or have the flexibility to change her schedule at a moment’s notice. Even though you may have the flexibility, you don’t want to fall into the habit of changing up your schedule. You need to stay committed to the time that you block off for yourself and the people you serve. This time blocking technique can also be used to the time set aside for spending time with family and friends and exercise.

Boundaries to consider:

Are there any days you block off as days of rest?
When do you check and respond to emails?
Do you check voicemail messages and answer them on the weekend?

Business is business. Friendship is friendship. You have grown your business to where it is now. You put in long hours may have spent a lot of money and time on training and suddenly people want to start picking your brain and they’re asking for extras. I learned a long time ago that this devalues a person’s worth. Even though you want to help a friend, you do need to set boundaries. You’re in business to make money and not to give away your content and knowledge for free. Chances are the other person will not be sharing or providing their service or product for free. There has to be a win-win otherwise people will take advantage of you. There are ways to create a win-win through volunteering or trading services. It is up to you what you want to share and help with. Remember your worth and value in the marketplace. Teach people how to treat you and when you’re in business you are there to serve but also to make money otherwise is just a hobby.

“The most important distinction anyone can ever make in their life is between who they are as an individual and their connection with others.”
― Anné Linden, Boundaries in Human Relationships: How to Be Separate and Connected

Boundaries to consider:

Is sharing your knowledge creating a win-win situation?
Are you in business to make money or is it a hobby?
Have you set clear expectations between friendship and business?

Learn to say no. You need to set clear expectations about what you are willing and able to do in your business versus what you can do. Just because you have a skill set that doesn’t mean you should be doing it all. Delegation is a key strength to increasing productivity and boosting performance in business. Not only are you saying no to things that you need to stop doing, you are also saying no to activities and tasks that do not utilize your strengths. Focusing on your strengths improve your business.

“if you want to live an authentic, meaningful life, you need to master the art of disappointing and upsetting others, hurting feelings, and living with the reality that some people just won’t like you. It may not be easy, but it’s essential if you want your life to reflect your deepest desires, values, and needs.”
― Cheryl Richardson, The Art of Extreme Self-Care: Transform Your Life One Month at a Time

Boundaries to consider:

Is there anything in your business you need to stop doing or delegate?
Are there any clients that are not the right fit for your business that you need to let go of?
What activities and have are you willing and able to do to best serve your customers or clients?

Setting boundaries not only teaches people how to treat you. Boundaries help you establish guidelines for yourself for what you are willing to do and what you’re not willing to do. Therefore you’re not compromising your core values. The clearer you are on who you are and what your company represents, the more respect you earn.

Although this seems a bit stringent, you will find that more people will actually be attracted to your business and find it more appealing because you offer structure, you have rules in which everyone will be treated the same, you abide by core values, and you are professional and respectful in your approach.

EPISODE 32: Help Yourself First

3 Ways to Establish Boundaries in Business