Over Thinking in Relationships Archives

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“The only people who see the whole picture are the ones who step outside the frame.”
― Salman Rushdie

Do you spend a lot of time in your own head? Are you replaying every situation over and over reliving every moment? Do you regret not taking action? If you answered yes to any of these questions you’re probably someone who analyzes every situation and you are an over thinker.

How do I know? I know because I used to be that person. About 8 or 9 years ago, I was sitting in the audience of a real estate seminar and I heard the speaker talking about online marketing and the potential of sharing information and educating people to help them make decisions and take actions that would transform their lives. As I was sitting there, all I could tell myself if I could do that. I went up to speak with the speaker after the event sharing my ideas as well as my thought process. He looked at me and said, “You don’t have to overthink things; it’s a lot simpler than you think.” He became my mentor. He challenged me to think differently than I ever had for this I am grateful because now I can see opportunities and possibilities.

Whenever I would start overthinking, I started to feel stressed out and even get anxious about the “how” of getting things done. I waffled when it came to making some key decisions. Sometimes I would even wake up at night wondering how will I ever get through this…make the money I want or even pay my assistant. You may have even caught yourself in the negative spiral thinking getting ready to believe the worst case scenario. All of this drains your energy. Thinking about a decision and making the decision are two different things. Decisive action is important if you are not going to miss out on opportunities. I know there were opportunities that passed by. My overthinking held me back from taking the action I needed.

How do you know if you are overthinking? You can’t stop thinking about anything else. It feels like the movie, Ground Hog Day, where the day gets played over and over. One of the most common thoughts is wondering what others think of you. You may have heard the saying, “What others think of you is none of your business.” It’s true. If you have not read, The Four Agreements by Don Miguel de Ruiz, I highly recommend it.

One of the agreements is not to take things personally. No matter if someone compliments – saying something great about you or criticizes you, saying something negative about you, it is their perception of their reality. I happen to want to take the compliments personally. We can definitely learn from and choose whether or not we with accept the latter. It does not need to define you. What matters is your perspective. Replaying what you could have done is sheer punishment, quit doing this to yourself.

What can you do about the “overthinking” or analyzing? You can start by taking action and doing more instead of learning more. You cannot start getting things into motion if you are hiding behind your computer or a book continuously working at learning more without taking action steps to move forward.

“We cannot solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them” – Albert Einstein

Here are some actions you can start taking:

Quiet your mind: meditation, prayer, or even sit in silence
Research new information
Make a to-do list
Journal out your thoughts in an objective way
Create an actionable plan
Set goals
Lay out a timeline with milestones
Ask questions: “If I could stop thinking about it, I would…” OR “Will what I am thinking about matter 1 year from now? 3 years from now? 5 years from now?
Listen to your advice. What would you tell a friend in a similar situation?
Distract yourself and put your attention elsewhere
Stop talking about the situation with others. Continuing to talk about it and ask advice from everyone we know we are continually thinking about the situation.

Action starts with making a deliberate proactive choice to get a different outcome. Put your energy on where you want your results to come from. I know it may feel like it is easier said than done. I challenge you to try it. Action is the cure for overthinking.

We would love to have you subscribed to the Success Secrets newsletter on my website at www.debrakasowski.com where you’re going to get us free MP3 download 10 Surefire Strategies to Power Up Your Productivity and Performance. I would love to hear about this podcast has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Share it with Your Friends. Give us a 5-star rating!

DEBRA KASOWSKI, BScN CEC is an award-winning best-selling author, transformational speaker, blogger, and Certified Executive Coach. She has a heart of a teacher and is certified in Appreciative Inquiry and Emotional Intelligence. Her writing has been published in a variety of print and online magazines. Debra Kasowski International helps executives, entrepreneurs, and organizations boost their productivity, performance, and profits. It all starts with people and passion. Sign up the Success Secrets Newsletter and get your free mp3 download today! www.debrakasowski.com

Time: 8:43 min

Keywords: What Causes Overthinking, Why Do I Overthink Everything, How to Stop Over-Analyzing, Over Thinking in Relationships, How to Stop Thinking, Overthinking Definition, Overthinking Quotes, How to Stop Overthinking Things, Stop Overthinking

where you’re going to get us free MP3 download 10 Surefire Strategies to Power Up Your Productivity and Performance. I would love to hear about this podcast has impacted your life. E-mail me at Debra@DebraKasowski.com. Thank you for listening to The Millionaire Woman Show where we talk about leadership, business, and human potential to help you live rich from the inside out. Subscribe to The Millionaire Woman Show. Share it with Your Friends. Give us a 5-star rating!

Time: 8:43 min